cows, pigs, chicken, and things

At a certain point “just” just ain’t gonna fly.  “I just gave birth to twins” stops being just, just about when exactly?  When can it stop being an excuse for your weight or fatigue?  “We just moved in” isn’t really accurate, yet our walls are still expressionless. It takes a while to decorate a home.  People order things, things with delivery dates of six to eight weeks.  We are not those people.  I paw my way through catalogs, but it’s all a ruse.  I’m not going to do that, to buy new, a bright living room with layered patterns and lush fabrics.  I “just” had children and have enough new in my life.  Two little news, in fact, who’ll defile any new furniture purchased.  But there’s no excuse for the plain as Jane walls.

I haven’t been posting much because I’m in organize mode.  Phil scoured the Internet and just purchased a new digital die-cutting machine for me.  The QuicKutz Silhouette.  It plugs into your computer and will cut out any vector shape (so all of my fonts).  This is important because I will never have a need for a cartridge or particular punch.  I can create anything I want, and then simply “print it” only instead of printing, it will carve out my design.  I cannot wait for its arrival (ditto on the iPhone I’m picking up this Friday!).  In honor of The Silhouette, I’ve converted “the junk room” into a scrapbooking haven.  First, let me just say, in a past life, I got a junk drawer.  And in Straight Up and Dirty, I give Romina “Rome” Rosen a hint of shit over having an entire “junk room.”  Well, you’re allowed to have a junk room when you live in Texas because everything is bigger here.  Our once junk-room, now combo office scrapping space, is not close to complete, as the walls are desolate.  I want to frame three of my Hermes scarves without having to actually frame them.  Very cake eat it too.  I want the look of them because they inspire me, their colors, rich drape, playfulness and grace.  I need to put up some art, things that make the room inviting and warm.  Something over sized and statement-worthy.  Our walls throughout the house are still blink.  Yes, blink, not blank.  Because seeing it written there, blink should mean “missing something” as in, if you blink, you would miss it.  Anyway… the walls are blink because we cannot make up our minds.  I’d like to cover a wall in black and white photos of friends, of our favorite places, but it’s a project just choosing, and then add to that uploading for the printing.  Sorting, combing through archived photo cds and external hard drives.  And then the both of us agreeing.  The photos don’t belong in the scrappy office space where color needs to inspire. They belong stacked uniformly in a hallway, something near the living room, photos of lives being lived.

My Mac is back.  I had most of it backed up, but despite this, most of my programs no longer work, even the ones for which I actually paid money. So that has been a nightmare and a half.  Any nerds who have a demonoid invitation for me, I’d so so so appreciate it.  I need all the help I can get.  Mostly, my fonts have been a tangle.  I’ve spent the past two days–not joking–just cleaning up my fonts (and I just purchased the fling font, featured on the cover of Blueprint Magazine).  So the Mac is cleaner, which means I’m as dirty as my mouth.  I haven’t showered in days.  There’s too much to organize.

My vagina.  It needed organizing too.  The truth of it all is, since giving birth via c-section, I’ve been too embarrassed to get my lawn mowed.  It’s the scar I think; it’s dark pink and kind of gummy looking, raised.  And I cannot imagine someone putting wax on it.  So yesterday I used scissors.  I’m far too prone to razor burn, and I still haven’t found (and admittedly haven’t been looking for) a waxing place like the mid-town Russian place I loved in New York (Elite day spa near Lord & Tailor–ask for it “French,” but say it in English.  So fast and cheap and good).

It’s been storming here today; the perfect weather for writing, especially camp writing.  It reminds me of cabin days, of mud sliding down “Girls’ Hill.”  I’m still in my “pajamas.”  I love days like this, lazy like a Sunday, except Monday.   I put pajamas in quotes because I’ve never been a pajama girl.  My aunt used to give us these hideous over sized flannel-type jobs, with overzealous prints of cows or flying pigs or ice cream cones on them.  She purchased these beauties from Filene’s Basement and gave them to us for Christmas, where they were quickly relegated to our basement.  “You know,” she’d say after inspecting our feigned smiles, “for when no one’s around.”  Yeah, no kidding.  “They’re comfortable.”  So is being naked.  Be the cow; don’t wear the cow.

And with that, I’m going to continue to download footage from our homemade videotapes into iMovie.  Once I’ve compiled enough cute clips, I’ll stitch together a movie that I might just share.  Oooh, I wish a Muppet type movie were on right now.  So perfect for a day like today.  I wonder what Miss Piggy would put on the walls of her scrapping room.



  1. Have you tried Nair or something similar? It's much better than it used to be. Or you could buy your own Bliss wax kit – it's actually pretty bearable to do yourself.

    Check out the Container Store for a temporary framing solution for the scarves.

  2. I love your writing! Really, I do. I don't use exclamation points very much either. And I don't have a junk room. I rent. And move too often to hang to junk handed down from friends through all the moves. I live in Austin and found you, somehow, in the mess of this world about a year ago. I am 26 and have all my childhood friends married and beginning to have babies. I am the lone ranger still single, and loving it. You've helped me understand, on some level, what they have gone through in the last year, and I thank you. Thank you for providing insight and offering humor and a sense of realness to this thing we call life.

  3. I know, it does take forever to furnish a home, especially if you want it to be personal and mean something to you. You can do it! Your home will be beautiful.

    As for that bikini wax– Angie is the owner of Blush. She is really great. I found her when she was awarded "best brazilian wax" in Austin Monthly. And she's a very nice person to top it off, not some weirdo.

  4. Miss Piggy would put pictures of herself on her walls and of course, of Kermit too. :) How cute your post is today – except the waxing part – not so cute!

    Love to help you decorate your walls! It's my thing – like being a foodie but for decorating. Feel free to e-mail me for help! I'm in the hood.

  5. Sorry to hear about your Mac and the programs that now do not work… how frustrating!

    It's so hot in Cali today I wish it were storming.

  6. I have been wondering HOW do you get time to write blogs with not 1 but 2 babies???
    In fact i keep telling to all my friends about u and keep wondering…how do u manage???
    i don't have kids but few friends who do have kids….does not look like they have anytime left for themselves.
    Hats off to u. :)

    FROM STEPHANIE: Thank you. Phil and I both work from home, and in order to actually get work done, we do have some help. She is so wonderful and good with the beans. I don't write about her to protect her privacy, but she is so great and such a pleasure to be around. She works five days a week, when we work, during the day. It's so nice being able to write a chapter and hear her singing Annie songs to them. I of course, chime in for the chorus. We have so much fun. And the babies aren't nearly as difficult as they were as newborns. It does get so much easier. Not nearly as bad as everyone made it out to be. Though I think we lucked out with such good kids.

  7. This is a very weird tip, but I did get it from my best gay boyfriend – for the bush, use a mans electric beard trimmer. Does the trick, it's fast and painless. If a guy will let that near his junk, rest assured that t is safe – and much nicer than wax.

  8. mmmm, as overwhelming as it sounds to fill a house, I can't wait. I want a room to organize art and pictures and books and wrapping supplies and frames and magazines I save with little flags on the pages I want to go back to someday. I can't wait for the day that I can put together a scrap book with all the lovely things I walk by in Michaels but don't let myself buy- because really there's no room for it in an apartment. Have you stated scrapping anything yet? Hope you share when you do!

    FROM STEPHANIE: No, I haven't begun to scrap, mostly in fear that I'll look back and say, ugh, what was I thinking? I could have done so much better. So I'm waiting for my die-cut machine. My plan, as of now anyway, is to design something with Photoshop and Illustrator, then figure out what makes sense to print and what makes sense to add. Meaning, I might set up the design online, print the photos maybe with a word over it… then adhere that to patterned paper, adding ribbon and buttons, etc. Hybrid, I guess, but really, most of it I'd do with my hands, not my mouse.

  9. I remember photos from your NYC apartment and you had a lime wall- I love that idea. I just don't know how to do it (I think all four would be a little overwhelming) and what linens to use. I'm thinking black and white. What did you use?

  10. oh my gosh, what a delightful post today. I t made me think about when I first moved into my divorced house with 3 pre-teens – how I was maniacal about decorating – getting everything just right – making sure every room said the right thing about me and my new found self. I carefully selected each piece of art, each throw pillow, the right area rugs…

    And I swear to god – I haven't done one thing since. Almost 8 years.

    Now – my focus is keeping the darlings all in their respective one pieces. I'm listening to their poetry – their 'series of pleasing chords' compositions on the piano – their petty arguments, and working like hell to keep their psyches together. My artistic outlets are 'effective ways to hang up thousands of clothes once out of the dryer' and 'keeping food in the fridge with 3 teenagers home for the summer'. They are beautiful works of art.

    I bet once my babies have left the nest, I'll look around, assess the damage, and either a) move or b) become maniacal about decorating and defining exactly who I am at that point.

    Anyway – so glad to hear you have some help, that the babies are fine, that you have enough room to have your own space, and that it was a lovely stormy day.

    Your post made my day.

  11. Ditto on the man's clippers. Just got to be careful.

    And Miss Piggy is the best. Makes me sad that kids these days don't have the Muppets. Or the Electric Company, for that matter. Sigh.

  12. So jealous your getting the iphone. I am a Mac freak and would love to get one, however paying 200$ to drop Sprint isn't worth it right now. After reading about your Mac crash I need to back up my most recent pics and files… scary.

  13. S, here's a couple of thoughts on those scarves (a.k.a. have cake & eat it 2)…have them color scanned & frame or set them up & photograph, send off or take to a quality printer and frame.

    I do this all the time – evolving and revolving art all the time. Think about it.

  14. If you can handle the pain you could get electrolosis. I'm doing it on my underarms, legs and bits. It's not too expensive and only hurts during the visit and not after. It is so cool to watch it disapear and hopefully never come back!

    FROM STEPHANIE: I watched visit after visit as The Wasband returned from a hair laser removal session… and the hair kept growing back. I needed drugs. What was I thinking marrying a man who lasered his body hair! I have a feeling this red hair of mine will not take well to lasers or electrolysis. Just a wimpy guess.

  15. Ha! Bushy bush after the babies. I had that going on too.
    Waxing on a scar? I cant imagine that is going to be good for the scar. I wouldnt do it if I was you. Be careful with those scissors. I had a gf cut one of her pussy lips.
    *clenches her own cookie*
    Ive cut my asshole with the razor before but it was just a nic, my gf cut a chunk off and is lucky she still has two lips.

    It does get easier with the babies and thats awesome that they are "easy" babies, mine was too.
    However, just wait until they are mobile. Everything changes all over again. But it's the most exciting time and you cant help but love it, even if they do get into EVERYTHING.

    My little Pud is snoring right next to me in my bed as I type this. I cant believe he's going to be four in August. Time flies, man, I mean REALLY flies with children. Take a few moments out of your day to absorb and remember all the details of how they are now, so tiny and new.
    I wish I had done this more often with my Boogey.

    I know you probably thought this was one of your "boring" ones but these are the ones I love. Just what is going on in your life right now.

    And you have to share a snippet of the movie.
    The 10 seconds of you on 20/20 just didnt pacify my curiousity in how you are in rl. I even tried to find your past appearance on the Food Netwrok but to no avail. Sorry for the typos. New lapop.

  16. It's so refreshing to read your blog! I enjoy your comments on scrapbooking. I visit the TwoPeas In A Bucket message boards because they have tons of information, but many of those women seem to do little else but share information about what they just bought…and then everyone on the board exits and runs out to Target or their local craft store to purchase the same things. I'm also a Mac evangelist whose license plate reads "CME4AMAC". I am so envious of you for being able to get an iPhone this week. I already have a Cingular/ATT account, but it's more than a bit pricey for this teacher right now. If you still haven't replaced your font, I found a free one that looks very similar to "Fling" on It's called "acadian".

    FROM STEPHANIE: Thanks for that tip. I did buy the font, but I also found these very similar fonts that work really nicely with it (just google them): Wenceslas Font, FrenchScriptMT, FontleroyBrown, Bridgework.

  17. Love, love, LOVE my QK Silhouette. Make sure to go and get the free downloads and buy a download card (way cheaper than outright buying online) from a retailer.

    I love the mini-glimpses into your life with this type of post. Thanks!

    Best to you and the family!

    FROM STEPHANIE: Why would I buy a download card? I can't ever imagine needing anything more than my fonts (and since I work on a Mac, not a PC, I cannot use their software. Instead I use a plugin for Illustrator). And thanks.

  18. I love the fact that you have to organize your vagina!!!! HILARIOUS. My boyfriend has been away in Iraq for only 2 months and I have not "orgainzed" since he left. It should be interesting when I need to for his mid-tour….although it is a bit freeing to not be organized in that arena.

  19. I just had my first brazilian yesterday. A friend of mine who owns a salon did it for me. She didn't even tell me. I thought I was going in for a clean up on the sides of my bush and she just laid the wax on my lips no warning! haha "well there's only one way thats coming off." As for your scar I reckon Nair is the safest right now till it heals right up. For scars I recommend using Bio-oil. Its great for taming it down and it's a great all round massage oil.
    I've moved into my house over a year now and it's still a blank canvas I had all the energy to install the kitchen and get all the flooring done. The only decor are my paintings and fresh flowers. I'm working on my photographs to put up but haven't decided where to put them. I was thinking along the wall up the stairs.

  20. I would not call myself a scrapbooker, however it does really inspire me. I enjoy my photos and I want to display them nicely in an album that I can improve over time. You mentioned the fear of looking back and thinking that you could have done better. I feel the same way and need a book that I can constantly improve as I have the time and money.
    So I headed to Michael's to buy a album. I have organized all of my pictures and have them printed and ready to go. Well wouldn't you know, I can't find a single album that I LOVE. I did like the Martha Stewart albums, I think I may go back and get one. Any recommendations on other albums? Did you find one that has you really excited? I just can't get myself motivated until I find a book that I love. I have to be excited about the details! It's the inspiration that will get me to the final product, you know?

    FROM STEPHANIE: I haven't found an album I like yet. I do know that I'm going to begin with a 12 x 12 layout and can start working on those pages before having the actual album. I don't want hers to be pink and his to be blue (boring) and too expected. I will add elements to the outside of the book, too. I guess what I'm wondering is this: there are all these books I've seen people make where their pages have "folder tabs" to help tell the story, add fun to the album, etc. But that doesn't really work for an album whose pages are slipped into those silky clear pages for storage. I guess I'm wondering, right there along with you, where to go once I get there… if that makes sense.

    I know die-hard nuts create their own albums, decorating the outside, everything, then creating custom sized pages to slip in, on those rings. I am not doing that with their first albums. I will begin with a standard post-back album for each of them, that way I can always change the order of the pages by simply slipping the designed page into a new slot, and you needn't worry about what goes next in the lineup… just design all your pages and slip them in when you're done… always can rearrange.

  21. Know what you mean by 'just'. I 'just' relocated from Amsterdam to London 6 months ago today (big celebration tonight and yes, have trimmed :-) ) and am still trying to find my feet… Our walls are bare too. Some things cannot be rushed! Our guestroom does have miniature Crabtree and Evelyn shampoo/conditioner/showergel though (nicked from the 1 hotel he stayed at for a conference, no shame my guy has!)

    How do you frame scarves without framing them? have got 30 scarves and sounds like a good idea! Please post a pic of the result!

    Idea: friend of mine received her first bikini framed on her hen-night from her mom. When I have babies, I'll do the same but will probably hang that artwork in our room for a while.

  22. steph, i feel you re. the waxing. i'm about to move away from ny with my new hubby and don't know what i'll do without elite in midtown or dyanna in flatiron – those russian ladies are the best! "is okay baby, almost done."

  23. come on, it's much easier than everyone says because you have a NANNY. you can't say that you know how it is to take care of kids full time because you are not DOING IT.
    this is NOT a commentary on having a nanny. i say, do whatever works for you. but you can't try to tell people it's so much easier than everyone said it was, because those people are people who took care of the kids full time. and are you cleaning your house yourself? well, add that to the reasons you shouldnt be telling people it's so easy. it's not, if you have to do it all yourself. and you're not in a position to make that judgment.

    FROM STEPHANIE: Actually, I AM in a position to say so. I have NOT always had a nanny. I CAN say I know what it's like to take care of two babies full time because I HAVE done it. And yes, I also manage to clean, and eat, and sleep, and write a blog. AND I also have time to WRITE important words in ALL CAPS for crappy emphasis. AND, I have a full time job to attend to…

  24. You need Bliss Ingrown Hair Eliminating Peeling Pads! And the best girl in Austin (IMO) for waxing is Cathy at Salon 505 at the Arboretum. $40 and she goes to town!

  25. Re: empty walls.

    Check out They take your words (or other people's words, if you're a verbal kleptomaniac like me), and print them in your choice of font, color, and size on self-adhesive vinyl. You rub that on to your wall, or can even wrap a longer one around like crown molding or a chair rail. You can remove it whenever you want. Perfect for a lover of words like you.

    My 8 year old son has to eat his veggies while staring at Tom Robbins' "If God had a bumper sticker, it would probably say Shine, don't Whine."

    FROM STEPHANIE: ACTUALLY… I can "print" my own vinyl words with my die-cut machine. I thought of putting a quote about family behind a series of family photos, but Phil pointed out that it's pretty cheesy. However, I think all bets are off when it comes to the empty media room we have (think mini movie theater room).

  26. AH, I used to go to Elite!!! But then Natasha left and started her own place around the corner (J'Adore). I've been in LA for over a year now and haven't found anyone that holds a candle to the Russians… Gah, I miss NY a lot sometimes, reading your blog makes me miss it more but at the same time embrace why I moved to LA.

  27. Victoria, "the" waxing place in LA is a scene to be seen in– Pink Cheeks in Sherman Oaks. You can sit side by side with movie stars at 7am on a Saturday.

    Cindy is the owner and the best. She may have actually invented the "Playboy," given her/her husband's connections in the model & movie world.

    Be careful, tho. The Playboy (Brazilian with a landing strip) is the default. If that's not what you want, you have to speak up fast!

  28. I've never had a cesarean but in my experience, Nair HURTS LIKE HELL on new scars.. proceed with caution.

    I am thoroughly jealous of your impending IPhone. Thoroughly jealous. That little toy needs to be mine.

    My friend has the first season of "The Muppet Show" on DVD. I stole it this weekend and watched the whole thing while making kiefle cookies. The pure fun of it is somewhat lost on an adult; for example, I never realized what a total bitch Piggy was (I still love her, though, especially the various coiffures). Then there's Kermit.. I mean, what kind of guy puts up with that shit from his woman? and on and on and on.

    (psychoanalysis of The Muppets = evidence of a very small life)

    I think I might buy Season Two today.

  29. I'll come to Stephanie's defense- I have 1/2 the babies she's got, and I've got a nanny, and a husband who works from home- AND it's still DAMN hard. Wonderful, every moment with the kid, but hard. Because unless you've got a live-in, the nanny goes home. And you still don't get the sleep you used to. AND you're working- whether at home or office. And it's hard to get your head around your relationship with the nanny, and the baby's relationship, etc. And you miss your kid when you're not with him, but you barely have the energy to entertain him when you are. Sigh.
    I'm exhausted. I think I'll take a nap on my office floor.

    FROM STEPHANIE: I guess having twins, you hear all these nightmare stories from people of how hard it will be. So you ramp yourself up for the absolute worst, and it hasn't been that bad. I mean, if you're going to be sleep deprived anyway, you might as well get it over with all at once with twins, oppossed to having one then waiting a few years to do it again. I guess my point was, since we expected it to be awful, we've kind of got off easy since they're such good, sweet-tempered babies… well he is. She's kind of a mini-me in that she's a troublemaker and a screamer/squealer. But it makes me laugh. Even at 3 am. I just expected much worse… but I hear it all changes once they can crawl. I'll let you all know. Had their six month wellness exam today. She's 13.13 lbs. and he's 15.30 lbs. "Oh my God," I said to Phil, "five more pounds and he's going to need a new carseat." They change so fast.

  30. I will never understand why women in here and act rude on someone else's blog. Just like that chick from the other day trying to imply I was trying to come on to Phil.
    It's almost as if some women come in here looking to fight, or at least to be smacked down by SK.

    Dont pit Nair on your scar. Put not pit. And you said nuts earlier. *immature*

  31. I enjoy it when you repond to comments, ESPECIALLY to clarify/DEFEND yourself! There will always be the critics…parenting is a tough job and we all should be more supportive of that fact instead of jumping to critize how someone spends their time to make a full life for their family.

    I have been dreaming of how I will decorate and organize my future craft room. Hopefully I won't have to wait too long for it. I would love to see pictures of yours as it progresses!

  32. First off: Meeooww! I like, no, Love fiesty Stephanie. And I love it when you give it to the commenters who have it coming. Nanny schmanny. It would be the same thing aka Daycare if you didn't work from home so they can go suck on a pacifier.

    In other important news I am The Queen of using scissors. Otherwise I'd be paying 50+ for a crap one here in Providence RI. The only place in town closed down and now this very seedy "spa" and the Elizabeth Taylor Salon are the only 2 places in town. I can't get back to NYC fast enough. Use baby oil (which I'm sure you have plenty of anyway) the Lavendar kind smells amazing and soothes any "ruffage" growing back in. Julie's right be careful, but I go very, VERY far down and I have no problem. I also keep Sally Hensen's self waxing thingees on hand for those "hard to reach places" aka "spreading the crack" (I loved that post). They hurt like a bitch but they work. Have a few glasses of wine and just let 'er rip. (bad joke) Just don't forget to take out the tweezers when you're done ;-)

  33. to be clear, i am not criticizing the use of nannies. hardly. but to imply, as stephanie has here several times, that taking care of babies full time is not as hard as everyone says is unfair to people who are doing it with no help at all. first of all, stephanie's posts, during the time at which she apparently didn't have a nanny were grim at best and dire at worst. all of a sudden, the mood of these posts drastically improved. which probably was the result of having help and plenty of it. taking care of the babies full time for how long? 2 months at most? doesn't give someone the cred to say 'it's not as hard as everyone said.'

  34. hi stephanie,

    i picked up "straight up and dirty" at the bookstore and refused to put it down despite the bf's whines.. i just wanna say how u're very inspirational to women out there.. n congrats for u've come a long way since (pre-kids and phil)..

    i can assure u u'll hate my blog coz i'm an exclamation mark girl with lol all over the place.. still i can't help but love everything u have to say.. u're pretty much the woman i imagined myself growing up to be, thinking "wow wouldn't it be nice to be like that? to have the confidence to talk like that?" while i was sitting down to tea at home with my legs tightly crossed, pink ribbons in my hair..

    maybe if i moved to manhattan.. just maybe..

  35. Linda,

    The more you write the deeper you dig. Stephanie was speaking of her own situation. Her own feelings. Who are you to dispute that she's found it less horrifying than she expected because the beans have exhibited sweet tendencies rather than hellish screams, allergies, sicknesses, hungers. Are you in Stephanie's bedroom? Are you involved in her daily interaction with TWO babies? Do you clock in her nanny? Note the times she works and when she cares for her twins? Your own insecurities are amplified here.

  36. I saw the comment about what albums to buy. I love these:
    They can be customized and are D-ring, not post-bound. If you've ever tried to put a post bound album together, you'll know why D-ring is SO much better. American Crafts has both fabric and leather albums.

  37. Ditto kimmisee…instead of criticizing other mothers, women should stick together and be supportive. Nothing worse than sanctimommies.

  38. Seriously, the whole, "stephanie's posts, during the time at which she apparently didn't have a nanny were grim at best and dire at worst" is a big fucking ugly-ass pregnancy pants stretch. To call that shit dire or grim and assume it's because I'm sans nanny? Come now. I was sans nanny when I was single and obviously quite competent at expressing and experiencing feelings just as deeply. To analyze my life, in what I post, and to say life without a nanny was nightmarish is nightmarish in its own right. I never said "all mothers who raise their kids full time are complainers." I said, from what I've experienced with my own very unique babies, it wasn't nearly as bad as people warned it would be, and that I was surprised by how easy it has been in comparison to those frightening warnings. Reading into that, that I'm somehow knocking others' struggles deserves a good knock upside the head.

    My struggles are different, more about wanting to be a full-time mom but also wanting to write. I can't do them both simultaneously, not the way I need to write. And productive days of writing come kind of bittersweet, not because of a missing or a longing, really. Not because of fear of not savoring the moments. It's an inner struggle. Wanting to be a good role model, wanting to attend to the needs of my most authentic self and at the same time wanting so much to live in the moments with them, as their mother, their primary caregiver. I want so much both of these things, and I have them both, just not often at the same time. It is a nice compromise, however, when Lucas is just beginning to fall asleep, and I have Abigail on my lap as I read her bits of Moose aloud, as I correct and type with one finger.

  39. all i have to say in regards to these posts is stephanie, you cant please all the people all the time, so why not at least please yourself?

    what i came on to say is that i have a confession.
    i used to read your blog for the usual stuff that made it good.

    now i am a Lucas & Abigail junkie.

    i only come on to look for pictures of the babies :)

    regards from indiana

  40. As a SINGLE, stay at home mother of 5 month old twins, with no nanny around, only wonderful family who help me I totally concur with Stephanie on this one. I was petrified of having twins and heard/read so many horror stories of how hellish it was going to be. Guess what? I too "lucked out" and have two boys who are good as gold. Hey, Im not saying that there arent days when they drive me nuts and I'm totally ready to put them on Ebay, but all in all I think it's a question of proportion. Yes, sometimes I have to let them cry while I am in the shower or tending to the other, and 5 minutes later they are just fine. Everyone told me that the first 6 months would be a blur and I can honestly say that that has not been the case. I make time to do my own things and am not one of those hysterical, obsessive Mothers, and as a they and I, are happier for it.

  41. Am no Mom, but woo-woo!! for SK for combining writing and babies, nanny or no nanny. Stephanie, you can still ride on credit for the rest of your life for being in labour driving to that hospital on your own in a strange environment, having a C section on your own in a strange environment.
    So you all just remember THAT when you think of saying how 'easy' it must be with a nanny.

    V broody, 31.5yrs and allllll my friends and family and favorite bloggers 'have delivered', but younger bf won't put out yet… But I am ready for a little one too. Or so I thought…after last night don't think I want to.

    We have friends staying over from Joburg, their 14month old didnt sleep on the nightflight and his system is all messed up. He woke us at 04.12 and wouldnt stop screaming untill I left our appt. for work at 07.27 this morning.
    BF smiled sweetly at me in the elevator asking if I was still broody (he knows I need my 8hrs). I nearly killed him..

    So even MORE respect to all y'all Mums outthere!

  42. Dorit, you are hilarious!! Ready to put your twins on ebay… just great!!! You made my day… well, my coffe break at the very least!

  43. The issue isn't that Stephanie finds it easier than she thought it would be. It goes back further. Reread what she keeps saying.

    "Not nearly as bad as everyone made it out to be."

    "…I was surprised by how easy it has been in comparison to those frightening warnings."

    WHY DO WOMEN FEEL COMPELLED TO TRY TO SCARE OTHER WOMEN? I cannot tell you how many times when I was pregnant, STRANGERS would come up and share their delivery nightmares. OHMIGOD I DON"T KNOW YOU! WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME ABOUT THE TEAR INTO YOUR ANUS?

    And women do it for pregnancy, delivery, childrearing…

    I've been at baby showers where the gifts given are onesies that say crap like, "I'll be waking you up at 2 am." What the HELL?

    Of course it isn't as hard as Stephanie imagined, because she heard horror stories! And most of us mothers know that it isn't a horror story, with a few nighmarish lows but many soaring highs and a lot of mundane mixed in.

    Does Stephanie have it easier than some? Sure. But we all do.

    Another woman peeve: the outdoing thing. "I was in labor 26 hours." "Well, *I* was in labor 36 HOURS!" "My baby was 9 lbs deliveredd vaginally." "MINE WAS 9 lbs, 6 oz!" "I breastfed exclusively for 18 months." "I did that PLUS I made all my baby's food from scratch from organic foods only."

    None of that matters. It's so ridiculous and useless. Women need to relate to each other in ways other than scaring and comparing. We need to boost each other, cheer each other, not try to push other Moms down so we can stand on them to make ourtselves higher.

  44. SK and Nancy,
    Thanks so much for the help with the album. Nancy, I really liked the basic leather albums and will enjoy the d-ring feature!
    I just want something that will look classic on the outside and anything I want it to be on the inside.
    Stephanie, I bought some paper that I really like and I am going to start page by page…switching my inspiration to the actual pictures that I am working with.
    Speaking of pictures, I came across the morphing site that you shared in your archived blog and had a blast with it!
    Thanks to you and your fans for such awesome finds!

  45. Okay I have new found respect for you, Stephanie. I got my first rude comment on my silly myspace blog yesterday (it wasnt even that rude to be honest) and I wanted to unleash.
    I dont know how you let a lot of these just roll off your back but i guess over time you get used to it.

    I still like when you put the smack down :D

  46. I love your writing. Right now, I'm searching for posts when you found out you were pregnant. They exist right? I hope so.

  47. Linda. You have issues.

    As if you really have the right to judge the validity of someone's experiences IN THEIR OWN LIFE.

    IF Stephanie's earlier posts sounded "grim and dire," do you think it could have had anything to do with the fact that, post-birth hormone fluctuations aside, she was also recovering from major surgery and had simultaneously doubled the number of people living in her home? Nanny or not, that's enough to make anyone sound despondent in the moment.

    Was this really important enough for you to change the entire discussion on this thread? Nope.

    Why don't you try celebrating with Stephanie if her posts have seemed more chipper to you instead of invalidating her?

    I mean, damn.. don't come to my blog, or you'll be lecturing me for mood swings every other day. And I don't even have kids.

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