on the hunt

I’m actively looking.  There.  Big shock.  I need to meet a man.

… who works in real estate who won’t charge me a broker fee.  Come on, someone who reads this has to know one.  Don’t tell me to go on craigslist or buy a no-fee apartment book.  Don’t tell me to call management companies and start asking.  I want names.  Give me the name of a broker who won’t charge me a broker fee, and I’ll date him if he finds me an apartment.  Shit, I’ll even pay for dinner.

I’m looking for a 1 bedroom apartment (no, I said 1 bedroom, not alcove studio) in the West Village or Union Square area only.  No, I won’t live in the Financial District or Chelsea.  They must take dogs (Linus is 16 lbs.).  The apartment must have a dishwasher, laundry in the building, and have a living room big enough to accommodate both a living room set up and a dining room table.  I love to cook and need space to entertain.  The bedroom must accommodate a queen sized bed and an office area.   I will not spend more than $2600 per month. 

Like a whore, I’m one owner away from the streets.  Whatevs.



  1. wow, and i thought i was the only one willing to whore myself out for real estate. how is it that i have friends in every random profession and NONE in real estate…

  2. WOW! That really makes Houston Rental Rates look cheap. But I have a car and car insurance so I suppose it's a draw

  3. Unfortunately, NCTRNL, $2600 is on the low side for a 1 bedroom in those neighborhoods. Any chance of buying, Stephanie, or is it better to pay rent? I've heard that renting is better in NYC, but wasn't sure if that only applied to those wacky-low rent controls that probably no longer exist.

  4. Jesus, there are kids starving in third world countries and you will ONLY pay 2600 a month. Rock on sweetie, glad to see a woman bringing in some cash. Perhaps a man needs to find you!

  5. Tell me about it…been looking to buy for too long. I hate to tell you, but you should bite the bullet and buy. With the tax deduction on interest and r/e taxes, you likely will be even on the total cost. For those out of state, the prices are rising to almost a $1000 per sq. ft. to buy.

    If you can't or won't buy, try http://www.eberhartbros.com All no fee apartments. A friend of mine lived in their apartments for about 5 years on the UES. It was a very nice place. They also have other buildings throughout Manhattan.

    Also try http://www.citihabitats.com, although I'm not sure if they charge a fee.

  6. I wish I could help. Good luck to you. I just paid a broker's fee…and that was for Queens.

    Houston is more expensive than NYC? thats news to me.

  7. $2600 for a one-bed!!! Does the apartment clean itself? $2600 gets you 3-4 beds and probably a garage, on Lake Shore Drive in Chicago. Remind me to get the cocaine business up and running before I move to NYC. However, more power to you.

  8. $2600 for 3 bedrooms on lake shore drive, does that mean a one bedroom is $1500 . . . where on lake shore?

    it would be cheaper than the 6 nights a month i spend at the hyatt

  9. I hear you, Stephanie. It sucks.

    You non-New Yorkers blathering on and on about rent prices in your town — just shut it. When we want to live in Podunk, we'll ask you for rental referrals. Until then, let us NYers pay our inflated rents.

  10. Does HE HAVE to be in real estate, or does the dinner offer still stand for THE guy that gets you what you want (in an apartment, that is)?

    Agreed, buying is a better option…..even if it takes a month or two more to find what you want (in an apartment, that is).

  11. You just described my flat, even down to the rent AND i'm moving soon. Unfortunately, though, it's in London…
    I have a request from you..as someone who is New York bound in the near future, what do you think are the best parts of manhattan to live in and why? DISCUSS

  12. Get out of the City (and the NY Metro area). For less that $1,400 a month I get 3 bedrooms, 1 1/2 baths, and 2/10ths of an acre. Contrary to popular belief, NY is not worth it.

  13. Yes Ella – just because we don't all in NYC, we MUST live in Podunk towns.

  14. Houston is not expensive. I live there. I moved from Hoboken after getting transferred. Its not even close.

    I'll never understand the obsession with NYC. Hoboken or Brooklyn is just a train ride away from everything…..

  15. Ella, comments like yours are why some people have such a bad impression of New Yorkers. Luckily I've met and know enough cool New Yorkers to be able to cancel your comment out without a thought. I guess we're all entitled to our own opinions though- I just don't agree with yours.

  16. I live in NYC and I don't think its worth it but I know I probably wouldnt like a place where the rent is cheap because there's a reason for that and its because nobody wants to live there…and also a lot of people aren't crazy about living in the middle of nowhere.

    I also think its crazy that people have a bad impression of NEw Yorkers because a huge percentage of them are not born and raised New Yorkers, they come from all over the country. If you lived in a city like this every single day you start to get a little crazy too.

  17. Do you remember the movie "My Dinner With Andre"? There is a line in there something to the effect of "New York is a prison built by the inmates who reside in it." That pretty much sums up why we all stay here. It's an addition. It's the heroin of urban living.

    1. The kicker is that the sick ones are those who don’t have the addiction.

      I left NY 2 years ago. I don’t miss it, I don’t long for it, but I still have the nagging guilt that the only way out of NY is down.

  18. what was that Sex & the City comment – "when you're living in NYC you're always either looking for a job, boyfriend or an apartment" ?? couldn't say it better!!!!!!!

  19. stephanie,

    you asked for it…seems like the inmates are your readers and the asylum is your blog. good luck in your search.

  20. Here is my conspiration theory:

    There are lots of cheap apartments in new york, especially in the village. You could actually get a two bedroom apartment for under $300.

    Alas, the big corporations, desparate to sell expensive pills to the unerected masses, take over all those cheap apartments. Consequently, talented artists eager to find a place to sleep, have to enslave their talent and help brainwashing the masses.

    The solution? artist uprising, taking over the central park zoo. But this belong to a different post.

  21. If you let me j-off on that pretty face, I'll give you a penthouse at the top of one my many buildings in NYC. Lemme know.

  22. Observer…isn't it conspiracy theory?

    Yes, there are a lot of cheap apartments in NY, but none are available because people do not move out of rent control or rent stabilized apartments.

    If you want to make money in NY real estate, you must move to where the artists are living right now. They live in areas that they can afford and usually they are not the best areas at that time. Within 10 years, the values will be through the roof. Case in point…Tribeca…now Williamsburg…what area is next???? If you know, please tell me because I might want to make that investment.

  23. To the Brit (or anyone) who is considering moving to NYC…I would say to look into Brooklyn…it's somewhat more affordable and a haven for all hipster wannabe's…Park Slope and Cobble Hill are two of my fave neighborhoods…

  24. H – that is great.

    I miss not thinking 2x about shelling out three figures a month for a hole that I used mostly to keep shoes and changes of clothes in the greatest neighborhood ever.

  25. Ella,
    I live in Boston, definitely NOT a podunk town. Rents here are a bit less than New York, but expensive just the same. A one bedroom can run you anywhere from $1000 to $2000 a month depending on where you live. The closer to downtown, South End, Copley or even Brighton, the higher the rent. $2600 for New York is about right. It's all about location. The cost of living in NY is higher. I own a 3 bedroom in a shithole town 3 miles from the ocean and 3 miles from downtown, and despite this, my property is now worth 4 1/2 times more than what I paid for it, and I hope to sell it this year.

    Good luck Stephanie, I wish I knew someone who could help you out. My relatives live in Brooklyn and they're into everything BUT real estate!

  26. I live in Belgium (Europe), and pay (with my boyfriend) 550 € (is not such a big difference from $) for an new appartment with a new kitchen, oven, microwave, everything in it, one bedroom, a bathroom with bath , a big living room and a garage. A lot of people here already think that's expensive for a small appartment. For 1000$ you can rent a very big house of loft here. Nobody can pay 2500 dollars here or they would have to be very rich, so i guess your wages are also much higher in the Statesthen in Europe,and everything is very expensive there, or you all have great jobs.

  27. I think it's time that we hit Grandpa up for some cash so we can buy a place together…and we can even say that Vernell will live there too! Wouldn't that be so much fun? I can see it now…a lovely home burned down due to a chicken roasting in a plastic tupperware container on the stove…so we'll go to Roy Rogers…again. Ha. Do you remember that?! The house smelled for a year!

  28. DUDE,
    Steph, please let me know what you come up with. I'm looking for the same: W village, lots of light, 1 bedroom… everything minus the dog requirement. If you find anything cool that isn't quite you, then please SHARE! (and as for that broker, … just tell him we'll make it DOUBLY worth his while!) ;-p

    xxx tali

  29. What’s up?, just browsing around and dropping you a note to say that I enjoyed your Blog. Keep up with the good work!

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