yabba dabba don’t: ugly houses

The Uncircumcised House or The Elephant Juggling Testicles
Featured above, the Elephant Who Forgot To Spit, or The House of Cock And Balls, or The Uncircumcised House of Pain. A night’s sleep in there is like napping inside a scrotum.

In search of ugly houses, I don’t know that you can beat this brand of hideous. Built in 1976 by architect William Nicholson, the “Flintstones House” of Hillsborough, California is the type of ugly house that demands a reaction. The most timid pipsqueak of a mole will find himself “OMFG”ing aloud. Touring the photos, it’s as if you’re winding your way through the small intestine. As a result, this is one of those rare moments in a writer’s life when words fail gloriously.

Here’s a real positive, though. This eyesore challenges your brain to imagine, imagine better. Raise the bar. Because I certainly never could’ve dreamed this up. It’s like nothing I’ve ever seen, except maybe once on Fraggle Rock beside the all-knowing Trash Heap.

The Ugliest House In America

Stage This House: Blowup Doll Edition
Stage This Ugly House: Blowup Doll Edition (How has this design tip escaped HGTV?)

You say Jacuzzi, I say Jurassic.
You say Jacuzzi, I say Jurassic

Global Cooking - Yabba Dabba Don't
“Global” Cooking – Yabba Dabba Don’t

Flintstones Fur Bath Towel
Don’t Forget To Wipe Your—Never mind (See fur towel)

Flintstones House Kitchen
Flintstones House Kitchen

Rock On? Rock way off.
Rock Garden Friends: Bocce balls, Dino Eggs, and Polished Turds

Side note: People with rock gardens only need that one descriptor, and in an instant, we get it.

45 Berryessa Way, Hillsborough, CA
For the bargain list price of $3,780,000.
MLS# ML81513899

Yabba Dabba Don't: Flintstone House


  1. you can see this house from the highway (280). i’ve always wondered what it looked like inside (ugh. awful.).

    1. Totally! I remember passing this house on the freeway as a kid, although at the time it was just beige (later painted the more colorful scheme it has today). Everyone who’s lived on the peninsula knows the Flintstone house.

  2. I am fascinated by this house! I see it every time I drive on 280. Apparently when the house was built, the neighbors were so angry they tried to pool their money to buy it and demolish it.

  3. Dick Clark also had a Flintstone-style house in Malibu – also fugly.

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