bedpans & broomsticks

In ALL, RAISING HOPS INTO BEERS by Stephanie Klein14 Comments

black apple doll
(Sneaky Trina)

Like many toddlers ours love animals. They love singing songs with animal sounds, love looking for the monkey, and showing me the embroidered zebra on their pillowcases, so when I came upon the Parents Animal Hospital, I added it to the cart, held out a few weeks, and finally revealed the sucker when I was about to drag a spork across my wrists.
A new toy will always hold them over. Especially when said toy has a BEDPAN included. Though try explaining that one to a child. Or an adult for that matter. I’m still not quite sure how a bedpan works. If it’s just some shallow bucket you grab when you feel the urge to pee, why not use a 7-11 Big Gulp cup? Why a bed pan? Do you know the way a massage chair has a hole for where your face rests? I know this isn’t right, but growing up I always imagined bedpans were similar to that hole, built into the beds. I also believed the pooping was done on the premises, so to speak.

Still, the wees love to make their animals go wee in the bedpan. We’re still working on the potty. Abigail’s almost fully potty trained, both at school and at home. Senor Beckett, on the other hand, has shown no interest, except for today, when I tried to entice him with TRAIN big boy pants. He lit up, and said, "No more diaper! Train pants, Mama, train pants!!!" I took flight, sprung into action, riffled through his sock/underwear drawer to discover fish underpants, dinosaurs, turtles. Diego.

That was it. The moment was gone. No train underwear. "No way," he told me. "Diaper, please." Sheesh.

As for the Animal Hospital, they’ve nearly outgrown it, and prefer the doll I made them (shown above). They named her Sneaky Trina. The only problem is, Sneaky Trina needs a bedpan now because Mr. Bikini smelled the uncooked rice in her weighted tush and decided to taste it. So our sneaky miss now has a bunghole. What’s not to love?


  1. I’m totally going to make a doll like yours next weekend! You’ve inspired me. Off now to buy the supplies. Love your crafty posts. They make me excited!

  2. I never would have imagined a doggy bieng attracted to uncooked rice. It will just give Trina a bit more personality. She seems like the kind of girl who might have a few interesting scars.

  3. Off topic, but I LOVED everything you had to say at your sxsw panel. Loved. So glad to now be catching up on your site! Just bought your books and am half way through Moose. Loving it. Thank you.

  4. i so love trina. you are super talented in every area it seems. i would love to see a week in the life of stephanie klein. you clock obviously has more hours on it than mine! keep up your crafts.

  5. Have the same animal hospital for my kids. Could’ve sworn you wrote about it before… because you’re the reason I remember buying it. I thought you’d mentioned the beans liking it. Good news: my Henry still loves his and walks around our house with his “master keys.”

  6. Okay, not fair. You have too much talent. Seriously? You designed this website, populate it with content, write books, speak at conferences (and you do it well!), your photography is inspiring, you made the doll above, and you draw?! And you have red curly hair! I just saw your featured “Monkey In The Middle” post, where you drew that monkey?! Please tell me you can’t add.

    1. I forgot whether ’twas on this blog or one of her books but Stephanie tutored calculus. Yes, she is superhuman!

      1. Author

        I know. I still kinda can’t believe that! Want another irony? My SAT math scores were waaaay better than my English. So, it makes total sense that I’m a writer. FAIL.
        See, those tests really only test how well you can take a test. They’re certainly not predictor kits.

  7. I just stalked you at Whole Foods. I felt like such an idiot. Eek. You were so gracious, and your beans are even more adorable in person. Hope I didn’t scare you. I promise I’m normal. Okay, will stop now.

  8. Love your craftiness, too. What’s your next project? I want to play along, virtually.

  9. Ugh, potty training! My son has no interest in getting out of diapers, either. Congrats on your daughter’s success! Boys can be more difficult, they say.

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