sad day


I’m really sad today. I haven’t left my bedroom. I know I have deadlines approaching, but I’m sick of looking at it. I feel like I’m all stomach, like I can’t breathe, all anxiety, like when you wake up and realize something has to change but you’re scared to start. I feel terrible and sad and lonely, and really like just complaining and crying. I’m being dramatic. My stomach hurts. My clothes don’t fit. I know a lot has to change. I feel stale, like I’m surrounded by too much of the same and I’m not nourishing my soul. I feel deadened and dull, and frizzy, unglossed. Freckled with kinky hair, blond eyelashes, calloused feet, bad breath, gross. Just sad.