a year in review

This is the song I sing to the sprouts every night before bed. Listen for Abigail’s scream–one she absolutely got from me. As for the thumbnail of the two baby birds, they were in a nest in front of our house. Much more welcome than the tarantula.



  1. Beautiful video. Hope the new year brings you and yours peace, joy and many blessings.

  2. Beautiful. A little sentimental for me because these are the exact songs my sister used for my nephew's bar mitzvah montage 12 years ago.

  3. That was adorable Stephanie!!! Luv the music too!!
    Have a wonderful holiday & a Happy & Healthy New Year!!

  4. I am so sorry that you've had such an emotionally traumatic couple of days…especially right at Christmas. It gave me a stomach ache just to read the posts from you and phil. My parents argued like that when I was growing up, and the memories still make me anxious. I hope things are better today. I also hope you can find a good marriage counselor, if you haven't already. (Not that you need that advice from a complete stranger…)It just seems like a smart, unbiased third party could help resolve these conflicts without all of the 'shoot, duck, and cover' that goes on. I truly wish for your family the resolution and happiness you want and need in the new year.
    And, thank you for the video– A touching reminder of what a difference a year makes. Gorgeous!

  5. Nice Job! Abigail in that Red Hat outfit… What an image! She is a bit of a ham, huh?

  6. This was very sweet. Oh my god. That fuckin' scream! My boy had a "girlfriend" in daycare who would scream like that and all I could think was, 'thank god, I dont have a girl.'
    The pics of Phil with the babies are near perfect. And I love the ones of your dad eating a sandwich with Lucas, and the frames of your mom (she looks fantastic!).

    "Sad Day" made me cry because I completely identified with it especially today, and this video topped it. Well done, Stephanie.

  7. Beautiful!!! Absolutely inspiring. Made me tear up. Did you use a Mac to do this? If so, did you use IMovie or FinaCut?

  8. sorry, hate to say it, but if he's calling you a fcuking moron now, whats it going to be like in five, ten years? where do you go down from there?
    if you dont get out, no matter what you say or think to the contrary, you are accepting it. your actions, or lack thereof, show that you are consenting to it.
    you are accepting it, for yourself, and for your daughter, who will pick a husband based, in part, on these interactions, and for your son, who will treat a wife, based in part, on these interactions.
    take your kids and, not to sound like your husband, but stephanie, get the fcuk out.

  9. that post from you and phil was so depressing – especially the fact that he seemed to STILL have a positive view of your relationship, but that you "want to leave"??? the most negative posts on your relationship are always those for which you close the comments. i hope you work things out, but it sounds as though it's past that stage – have you sought out marriage counseling?

  10. So cute. My ovaries are on fire – I need ten of those pronto.
    Your family is positively gorgeous. Hope you are having a great holiday.

  11. That's the sweetest thing. I believe I had that scream down pat by the time I was Abigail's age. Come to think of it, I still feel the urge to just screech sometimes. I hope you feel a bit less "ick" in the next few days.

  12. Beautiful. I feel like I am you 4 years ago. Can't wait to be on your side. Happy holidays.

  13. Don't you love that they have EACH other. Wow. That was just completely totally awesome. ALthough two of my three kids are here tonight, MY Lukey is at his grandpareents for a special sleepover, and MAN I miss him!!! Beautiful Stephanie, thanks so much for sharing your gorgeous family!

  14. Greatest compilation video EVER!!! That was so beautiful and your pictures are incredible!!

    …and you deserve an award for the most stylish children EVER!! Great, great, great video, Stephanie! You are super mom!!

    Happy Holidays!


  15. Oh my gosh. What a wonderful documentary of the last year – I can't believe how grown up they are. Such beautiful babies.

    And now – a few things.

    1) I am so impressed with you – I admire you incredibly…documenting these changing times with your darlings, capturing those moments that are so fleeting…in such a beautiful, poetic, amazing way…astonishing.

    2) I'm worried. That interchange between you and Phil, and your sad post, make me ache.

    3) You'll be fine. Continue to build your inner strength – everyone wins when you're strong and happy.

    Thanks for sharing…be well. Reach out if you need help. Keep those babies safe and warm, right under your wings.

  16. The beans have blossomed! They are so gorgeous and I agree with the previous poster about how great it is that they have each other.
    Regarding the post from the previous day, you reflect what so many couples are going through. You mentioned that Phil works in the financial sector so I'm sure he's very stressed and you're working on deadline. This can only equate to combustible situations.
    Seeing Lucas running around with Abigail is so poignant considering all that he went through a while back and this year was filled with health challenges for Phil so perhaps it's good that he's expressing stuff rather than bottling it in.
    But both of you should try to step back and not let fights get nasty; sometimes it can go too far.
    Thanks for sharing.

  17. So Beautiful Stephanie!! Thank you for sharing so much of your life with us! The beans are growing up so fast. So cute! :) I teared up at the picture of them hugging.
    Great job! Perfect choice for the music!

    I also teared up reading your post "Sad Day". I could really identify with it. Your honesty continues to inspire me.

  18. One of my favorite parts of a Bar/Bat Mitzvah is the montage, and this was just as professional, if not more, than most I've seen! Perfect!! Thanks for sharing!

  19. I'm out of town for work right now and drinking a glass of vino and have a warning for everyone::: This is such an adorable video it will bring tears to long time readers!

    Your "beans" will love seeing this years from now

  20. wow…I'm speechless that's how beautiful that was. I got this weird feeling in my chest/gut….I think it's my clock ticking. Can't wait to have babies of my own.

    That being said….there's this Image of Lucas from June or July or something where he looks exactly like you….you must be so happy. He's so handsome and well little Abigail is just the sweetest thing with those huge blue eyes (God Bless the beans). I love the picture of her in her pigtails far out on the grass with her hand out. Just beautiful. I only wish to be half the photographer you are….i try and try but I need to learn a bit more.

    I'm sending you hugs from NY….I think a hug is in order.

  21. ok…..so maybe i'm an idiot but i cannot find any link or video or anything to let me see this wonderful, moving video everyone speaks of…..WAAAHHHH!!!! i want to see beautiful babies and loving photos and happy times so i can live vicariously too!!!!! :) little help?

  22. I found myself wanting to protect you and comfort you after reading the last couple of posts. I even imagined an invisible shield between you and Phil where none of the rage could get through to you.

    My dad, whom I love dearly, had issues with rage when I was growing up–and my sister is now married to a man who exhibits explosive rage…and they have two young girls. I have been avoiding family get-togethers for the past several years because I can't stand to be around her husband. And I confess I don't read your site nearly as much as I used to. It's painful to read about your experiences with your husband. I hate to think of how it felt to be you while it was happening, and afterward.

    Please trust yourself. You're not crazy, and you're not doing things "wrong."

    I hope I'm not being intrusive. I'm just well aware that you're not just a blog, you're a flesh-and-blood person. And I want you to know you're not alone. I sincerely wish you peace in the New Year.

  23. Love the video. The beans are so CUTE! And I like the way you did the she said/ he said of the argument with two sides. Having met Phil (and you!) several times, I've enjoyed talking with him. I expect it's harder to deal with many "smaller" things after some of the health issues of this year. Wishing you both a much better 2009 all around and keep those pics of the beans coming! They are just as adorable in person as they are in photos. Makes me regret missing out on having my own, but also makes me enjoy other's kids more. Happy New Year!

  24. I loved Lucas' taken aback expression during Abigail's scream. He looked startled that the screech got thaaat loud.

  25. Darling, darling, darling. And can I say, I love that your kids are always dressed like little catalog models. I would guess there's not a lot of Target and Old Navy in their wardrobes? (Of course, if I ever had kids, they'd probably be in rags…)

  26. 1. Lovely montage.

    2. I am sorry you are having such a shitty time lately. My husband has been listening to my occasional grumbling about wanting to get back into photography and got me a Nikkon and a lense for Xmas. So I went back to your archives about photography 101 and am taking your advice about learning about aperture, etc. Thank you for taking the time to write this stuff down.

  27. I have always been going through your blog. Your interests didn't capture my mind. But once I saw your kids, along with your voice (I think it is)it made me cry… to be really honest. Never have you had such capabilities of making a 13 year old cry…

  28. That was just beautiful and the children are growing up way too fast. It will be over in the twinkling of an eye, I'm 70 and I have no idea where the years went Stephanie.
    You almost sound depressed which is something I got from my Mom and passed on to my daughter.Don't let this sadness go on too long, take care of yourself and remember the best thing you can do for your "beans" is to love one another.

  29. Hey girl! Love this and all of your blogs…except when you are sad! Just wanted you to know I meantioned you on my website and would like to link your address so my readers (so many less than yours) can read you too. You have inspired me to reach for my goals! Thank you and stop by sometime and leave a note if you're bored!

  30. What is the name of that song? I want to start singing it to my son.

    FROM STEPHANIE: You're the love of my life
    By Carly Simon.

  31. wow, if someone spoke to me like that i'd feel pretty sad too. moron? seriously? please.

  32. i compared your "two sides" post to my own relationship – i have a similar habit, i repeat myself and say the same thing often more than twice…it does annoy my partner sometimes, and he lets me know; he tells me my repeating makes him feel as if i didn´t trust him to be smart enough to understand the first time around. and i assure him that, well, it´s just my little habit, that yes, i use too many words sometimes, and besides…many people indeed aren´t listening/don´t understand the first time. that it has nothing to do with him. calmly putting the little annoying mannerism into place, to end the conversation with a hug and kisses…i just can´t imagine calling my love a "moron", EVER.
    so yes, I do believe Phil´s outbursts point to bigger underlying issues. it may not issues related to you, Stephanie, but I would expect my partner, out of respect for me and for the sake of our relationship, to take the initiative and search for the roots of his anger, and to make sure he will not continue hurting you. it should be his very own interest to make sure it won´t happen again. I don´t usually comment on other people´s business, but as you put it out there, please know, this is not the way to treat you partner. you can either handle these things calm and with love and with respect, or angry and hurtful. it is a choice to let this happen, not a fixed trait of character. may you find your way to handle difference and conflict with love as your guide. i wish you guys the best.

  33. Stephanie,you have such a gorgeous family. It probably wasn't a good idea to watch this on the day my husband told me we had to postpone our plans to have a baby, due to the economic crisis… You are so lucky and deserve the best!

  34. Beautiful video. Your children are gorgeous. Lucas to me looks like an "old soul" and Abigail is such a cutie. Beautiful photos. Treasure these photos…My daughter is turning 13 in May and I'm not sure where the time has gone…I guess the New Year is making me nostalgic.

  35. I know this was over a week ago, but I'm just returning to work, which is where I read your blog.

    I just had to respond to the post about you and Phil, eventhough you did not open the comments on that post…and I totally understand why.

    I'm glad you wrote it because it made me understand my 4 yr old a bit more. He does that. He requests that you repeat responses more than once. He'll restate the question until he is satisfied that all parties understand.

    I know it's new age mumbo jumbo, but you may have been born during mercury retrograde. My son was and so was almost everyone else I know that does that. That's the meaning of that particular retrograde. communication: re-peat,re-think,re-word.

    I'm a practical gal, but sometimes drawn to mystical and unconventional subjects :-)

  36. My daughter Raven had a scream like that…as she got older we called it her "stranger" scream…rofl…it was so loud and high it would reverb off the walls! haha

  37. Great job, first 30 seconds. After that this 'piece' really doesn't mean anything to anyone other than you and your family.

    Why torture the complete strangers of The WWW w/ your 21st century version of the dreaded slide show? Did the neighbors decline your invitation despite the allure of free food?

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