Ink Bleed Crazy

The other week I ate handfuls of Belgium chocolate almost without noticing. It wasn’t mindless or accidental. It was deliberate and avoidable, but I chose to do it. And then I paid for the choice in pounds. I’m now making the choice to paint my feelings instead of eating them. I’ve got 9 lbs. to release now. It all starts with the commitment to disrupt the routine that’s not working with a new one that does. So far, what’s been working is painting and sketching at night instead of eating. I love it. It brings me so much joy.
I wish I could do nothing all day except paint and drink tea and snuggle my beans and reprimand Abigail about brushing her knotted homeless hair. I feel like hair is just a thing between mothers and daughters. I get frustrated when she leaves the shower with knots still in her hair. And she’s rightly very private about her time in the shower. She doesn’t let me come in and remind her to use the conditioner, and she yells at the top of her lungs when I try to bring it up before or afterward. Then there’s the inevitable sit down, where I’m pulling matted knots from her hair with a Wet Brush. Holy hell why?
I think next I’ll paint a photo of Abby with unknotted hair.
Watercolor Dumon Belgium


  1. Feel your pain Stephanie – my daughter is the same… She wants long hair but doesn’t want to maintain it… 8 going on 18..

    In other news I joined Slimming World a few weeks ago and am 10lb down, I am not sure if the programmes are the same in the USA as they are in UK however I am finding it very very easy.

    I would love to see a messy watercolour of tangled unbrushed hair :-)

  2. Do you think there’s a pattern where you post more when you feel good about yourself and less (a lot less) when don’t feel good about yourself? Maybe your mental energy is somewhere else. Anyway, 9 pounds is just weight. Don’t be too hard on yourself.

    1. Author

      Ha, I think it’s the opposite. When things are falling apart and BAD, that’s when I feel like I need to write! I need to slow things down and examine them, to pick life apart, pick up behaviors, hold them up to the light and inspect their undersides. When everything is good, when I’m in the flow and don’t have much to contemplate, I’m in the flow, in the living, and I feel less of a need to document any of it. I post most often when I don’t feel good! Does that make sense?

  3. I agree, those 9 lbs are just weight. Don’t let it weigh you down mentally.
    Your paintings are awesome. Sounds like the creative process is brewing regardless if its via writing or painting. just keep going. :) and posting!

  4. I think you’re awesome…i need to spend more time around your energy. I knew there was ‘something’ about you i loved. Your energy shines through in everything you say and from what I’ve read so far, i believe you are amazing and we should get together, not in a meeting perhaps for some tea. I need more of Stephanie in my life. You are a true motivator. Life has been crazy lately for me and i don’t stay at meetings because of outside influences but come Monday im sitting my butt in the chair and staying NO MATTER WHAT!

    Christine Monday WW

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