He’s in the hospital again. 

Wednesday we had the 20 minute EEG, then the neurologist came to give Lucas a physical exam.  I had to remind myself to breathe.  Phil and I were terrified, basically wondering if we even wanted to know the results.  What if they’re really bad?  Maybe ignorance is bliss, right?  And to be quite frank, we left knowing nothing.  Just as clueless.  "Well, I saw some irregular things, I guess."  What?  You guess?  I don’t understand.  What does this mean?  What do you mean?  "Well, these kinds of tests aren’t very accurate.  It could have just been his head moving."  What?  If it’s not accurate then why do it?  Here’s what we did learn: he’s not having seizures.  We already knew that!  I never said they were seizures, what I’ve said all along is that they’re jerks, the kind we get when we’re falling asleep, but he has them when he’s awake.  He did this before the shunt, I explain.  I get no damn answers.  No "what caused this?" or "what can we do about it?" answers.  No "what the hell is it even?" answers.  Phil and I left annoyed. 

He’s projectile vomiting everything and now also has diarrhea.  I do not believe this has anything to do with his shunt.  I think it’s a teething thing.  We take him the next day to his pediatrician, in whom we have total confidence.  Lucas has no fever, no appetite, maybe a cold.  We’re most concerned about dehydration since he’s keeping nothing down.  The doc tells us he suspects the little man’s got a stomach virus that’s going around.  I wonder why Abigail hasn’t caught it.  Maybe there’s something else going on.  This morning Lucas was still unable to keep anything down, and still has the ‘rhea.  The 1 tsp./4x day of Mylanta ain’t workin’.  So now, Lucas is in the hospital again.  Hooked up to an IV so he doesn’t get dehydrated.  They did another cat scan: all was fine.  Did a shunt x-ray: all was fine.  Blood work: waiting to get it back, but think it’s fine.  They’re doing a special x-ray for his upper GI, to see if some hole might be too small or something.  I don’t really know.  And he’s getting another EEG, this time a 24-hour one to see if there’s any kind of pattern or problem.  The EEG is a crap test.  The 24-hour one is a less crap test than the 20-minute one, but just the same might not tell us all that much.  Mostly, we’ve just been told he’s got slight myoclonic jerks, not myoclonic seizures.  Big difference. And we’re thankful for this news, if one can call it that.  I suppose we’ll learn more in the coming days, but we might not.  I just want the little guy to feel better, to be able to enjoy himself, and for us to be able to enjoy him right back.  At least the kid is in good company; now his stressed out mama’s got the ‘rhea, too.