I’m in The Hamptons for more poolside banter, more cocktails, and more freckles. Except this time, I’m sitting it out in the shade, working. Soon there will be poolside bbqs at friends of friends places. I’ll run into more people who at some point went to the same camp or school with me. Currently, I’m at Micheal Becker’s house, sitting in his shade, juicing up the laptop with his electricity. “Has he changed much since high school?” his girlfriend asks me.
“Nah, that’s the thing. We don’t really change all that much.” Any real changes we make feel enormous to us, but to an acquaintance, the change would go unnoticed. We spend our lives trying to hide the things we know we should change. The only people who really see it are the ones who are deeply involved in our lives, and who are usually the ones coaching us through it. “He’s the same.” I smile and have no idea. He was always nice to me. That’s all you really remember when someone asks, “what was he like in high school.” He was always nice, but so was my ex-boyfriend. Charming. Nice. Hid that nasty shite where no one else could really see it… until it was sleeping beside her. I don’t think you really know someone until:
You know what kind of drunk they are (I’m an emotional confrontational mess mostly)
You’ve been lost with them in car (I laugh and end up talking about the music. A map is nothing more than paper that’s hard to fold if I’m holding it.)
You’ve survived Blockbuster (I won’t rent anything frightening. I hate being scared.)
You’ve been sick in front of them (when I’m sick, I don’t want anyone to see me, worry my breath is a chronic case of horrible, and all I do is apologize.)
You’ve gone shopping for one person. (I rarely want any guy to go shopping with me. What? I want him to sit there miserable, text messaging, wishing he were somewhere else, anywhere else, while he blatantly checks out the other women as they check themselves out in three-way mirrors? I think not so much.)
You’ve had a big fight (I usually need time to cool off before I act like an insecure child anyway, and I love makeup seex).
You’ve seen them interact with friends and family
You’ve seen where they live
You attend an event where you know no one other than your date
What else?
