In ALL, LIFE OBSERVATIONS by Stephanie Klein50 Comments

I’ve already told you I’m lazy; I let my dog shite on the floor.  So let’s start here today.  For starters, I’d like to know who actually takes the time to write suggestions and fold them into squares.  Then feed them into a box with a slit.  Who reads them?  Well you’ll all be happy to know that I’ve got a box and a slit.  How anatomical.  And today, it’s my turn to feed on suggestions.  I’m reading them, and I’m taking them–but just to be clear, they’re suggestions, not advice.  Unwarranted advice makes me gag.  Poems make me flinch.  Don’t do that.

I’ve been hard at work on writing a book, so now it’s up to you.  Tell me things about which you’d like me to write here.  Now’s your chance.


  1. You say you don't diet any longer, which is great. And you look incredible. What is your food philosophy (do you have one)?

  2. I've been enjoying your entries for a while now, just haven't made any comments yet. But here are my suggestions for some things to write about:

    Pull a Beastie Boys and give us your impressions on Queens, Brooklyn, the Bronx, Manhatten, etc. You've been in NYC a while, and I'd like to hear an insider's point of view about those areas.

    Your photography. Do you take a certain approach to it, look for something in particular, or just go around snapping pictures?

    Along the lines of "100 things from my dad" and "100 things about me," how about a "100 worst dates" to give us a snapshot of your dating scene.

    I'm sure I could come up with more, but I have to give other people a chance, too.

  3. I've got a suggestion. No more tart vagina references. ;| Actually, I really enjoy your posts and would not even attempt to suggest subject matter or critique your current postings. I do enjoy when you go off on sissy, carb counting metrosexuals though. Where is the slit located to slide this through?

  4. Well, is it truly a suggestion if I say that I love what you have done thus far and that you should just keep it coming? I envy your photographs and aspire to take pictures half as lovely. Look at me, I'm gushing. I've been reading for about a month and think your writing is exceptional and I enjoy it every day. Don't know if that was helpful or not, but wasn't it nice to hear? :)

  5. Well, is it truly a suggestion if I say that I love what you have done thus far and that you should just keep it coming? I envy your photographs and aspire to take pictures half as lovely. Look at me, I'm gushing. I've been reading for about a month and think your writing is exceptional and I enjoy it every day. Don't know if that was helpful or not, but wasn't it nice to hear? :)

  6. Holy cow, that suggestion box metaphor is hilarious. As far as suggestions go for writing, you do quite well on your own. No tainting from us needed!

  7. i personally enjoy reading about your thoughts, ideas and musings, rather than the accounts of the sceney glam parties. that being said, keep doing what you are doing. it's great so far.

  8. Hmmm. I loved that Barbie post from a while back. I like it a lot when you go all metaphorical on us. And the "sex of a city"– that one was great. So really, things like that are my favorites. But I like everything you write.

    OOOOOH OOOOH (she says, like Horshack from Welcome Back Kotter)….. How about a few stories that tell details of how you got some of those cool Paris shots? Or Italy ones? More! More! I love the ones you always get of old men….

  9. More Linus! damn is that dog cute…maybe i missed the entries, but how did you come into ownership of your little man?

    no other suggestions, you always have a diverse array of stories to tell, I glad to have happened across your blog, its great reading.

  10. Anything that helps us to better understand the moments in your life that have truly shaped you. You already give us these teasing little glimpses and I think its great. In a world that is so consumed with falseness, your brutal honesty is refreshing.

  11. More about the stupid things that we (guys) do…whether it be trying to pick you up or something done when out on a date. I guess this so we learn what not to do.

    More about what you are feeling and why. Don't leave us hanging as to why you are feeling a certain way. Plus guys need to know how women's minds work.

    More about your past and what has shaped you as a person. Your past provides a significant amount of information that tells us who you are and what you have gone through.

    Less about your ex-husband. We know that you were hurt and probably still are. I think that you think about the situation you were in a lot and it continues to fester all of the hurt. Maybe you just need a distraction (someone new), but I think the constant reminder of him just makes things worse for you. Plus, I hate to read about you crying and it makes me mad that someone treated you the way that he did.

    More pictures and drawings!!!! Your talent should be out here for all of us to enjoy.

  12. You relay stories of angst very well, and have a rare ability to expose raw emotion in a unique way.

    I haven't encountered many writers who can make me "taste" the atmosphere they're painting like you can. I've never skipped an entry because of disinterest, so it's difficult to offer any suggestions.

    I wish you luck, though I don't think you need it. I'll definitely be adding your book to my collection.

  13. I wouldn't dare suggest anything, because the best writing seems to come out of almost nowhere, and why try to stick to a "format" when you're already such an entertaining read?

    My suggestion? Don't take suggestions and continue to be yourself- staying "on topic" is for people who color inside the lines and take the same route to work every day.

  14. 1) More skin, less pretense.
    2) More pics of your behind and less lament about what should be behind you.

  15. You know, I don't know if anyone else has a problem with it, but since this is a suggestion box, I thought I would mention….. your font is kind of small and makes me squinty eyed. I always have to go to the "View" bar and make it "larger" or else I just can't read it. I know small fonts are popular… but is it possible to pop it up from 10 point to 12 point? I am lazy, too, and hate having to reset my "view" menu. :)

  16. I love your site, keep up the good work!! But I must admit that after reading your 'indepth' article about going 'brazilian' I think I may give it a miss??

  17. -more lists– they are the best
    -more stories about your childhood– the honesty kills me
    -more about your daily life in nyc– love that
    -dish about your ex
    -more linus– so cute
    -your favorite things in ny– that would make a good list!
    -really anything– keep it up & don't change a thing. i love everything you write!

  18. Use your humor! Most of the stuff you write is incredibly funny! I think I'd like more lists… it's inspired me to do my own. What the hell, I'm out of work and it keeps me busy! Writing about events from your past is always good. When I write, I usually laugh at myself. I once wrote about ages in my life. You know.. life at 5, 10, 12, etc. If you want, I'll send it to you. It's not funny, it's rather sad and serious in a lot of ways, but it shows how much I've grown through the years.

  19. go on stephanie,
    write the goddam book please.i am doing my eyes in looking at the screen,and you know that zillions would read it.
    take a chance honey,little less socializing and your pooch would love your company anyway
    stay as sweet as you are
    matt in the desert…….
    matt haywood that is!!!

  20. hey, Stephanie… write about how much you love…


    No, just kidding. You don't need a fucking suggestion box. The stuff you come up with on your own is better than good enough.

    Take care of yourself.

  21. Can you tell us about your beauty regimen? Make up, hair products,eyebrow waxer, favorite clothing stores? Do you straighten your hair yourself or have it blown out?

  22. Don't be afraid to post of picture of yourself that is less-than-flattering.

  23. Stephanie, post about the J.A.P. Chronicles. I'd be interested in hearing what you have to say about it.

  24. JDate

    I hear every Jewish single person in NYC is on it. True? Are you?

  25. Who are your role models? Who did you look up to as a child? Do you think any specifc person has influenced the person you are today?

    I only ask this because in a way, you are an influence on me. I stumbled upon your blog recently (completely by accident) and you seem to be such a terrific, funny, intelligent, well-rounded woman. You are the kind of woman I strive to be.

  26. How does it feel to enter history. In one moment you are not a part of this river without any form other than your private progress, as in a very unroyal progress. In the following motion, you are linked to the New York Times in this historical fabric. Do you realize you are hypertruth as compared to hyperfiction? I have written hyperfiction for ten years and poetry for thirty. You in the act of this blog created your own dimension. When does fiction and friction stop? What is the boundary between virtual and actual sexual tension? How are the motions of the erotic song different from the motion of the pen dipped into ink as in some Victorian journal? How do we separate ourselves from the observations that multiply without limit? How do we cut through the bullshit to some more elaborate and unanticipated fantasy?

  27. Hi Stephanie,

    This morning, after completing my weekly ritual of voraciously poring over the Sunday Styles section of the NY Times, I immediately ran to my room, grabbed my laptop, and went to your blog. I needed something to fill the void the season finale of Sex & the City had left… and watching the DVD episodes straight through, season by season just wasn't going to cut it… besides, I did that last week- for about the 5th time since the show ended.
    Anyway, I've only read a few of your blog entries so far but I can't get enough!
    And I was wondering… I just finished my freshman year at Barnard and I was curious if the Barnard vs. Columbia "rivalry" existed when you went there? Did Columbia girls ever try to make you feel inferior (when clearly Barnard girls are infinitely more attractive, mature, and often times more intelligent)? Did you ever tell strangers "I go to Columbia", just to avoid the blank stares and the dreaded response: "oh, Barnard… I've never heard of that one. Where is it?" Did you ever get that popular, snide comment from the jealous Columbia girl: "oh, you go to the Barnyard… the backdoor to the Ivies".
    Maybe you didn't… or maybe you did and just didn't give a damn what anyone thought. I was just curious.

    Keep up the fantastic work. I can't wait for your memoir to be published.

    Kathryn McGinnis

    P.S: I'm sure you get this at least a 100 times a week, but your hair is GORGEOUS! Lucky girl.

  28. I can really relate to your thoughts and actions about being a single woman in NYC. Now imagine that you have a seven year old girl. Whoops! It happens and all of a sudden you are dating again and trying to be normal in this normal city we love so much. It is as if you are a parent and a teenager at the same time. Sneeking around. Taking phone calls in the bathroon. Trying to have sex without making any noise so that the little princess will not catch her mom naked in her bed with some man. She will call out, "I'm telling grandma!"It can be funny if it was not pathetic at the same time.Keep making me laugh!

  29. Try eating a lot of sunflower seeds. For some reason, for a few days after eating them, you lose the urge to snack on your fingers

  30. Briefly read some of your stuff. Your an alcoholic. When your life gets sufficiently out of control, skip the therapists, transendental meditation, or whatever else is trendy this week and seek help for that. Your life will get better, I promise.

  31. I havent any suggetions right now. I just want to tell you that you are damn beautiful, both in your presence and your writeups.

  32. I stumbled upon your blog and have been reading it for the past two days. I love your honestly, creativity and energy. Thanks for sharing and keep writing!

  33. I found you today. I went to Greek Tragedy. Sorry, it's Geek Tragedy. The internet has the potential to amplify intelligence, or nonsence.
    One guess where your blogging fits.

    That does not mean I don't smile at what you do.

    Wanna write? Get all Philip Roth's novels. Copy each; in longhand. Then write. That's the only way to become a writer.

    You're welcome!

  34. Hi, I am a newbie to your blog, via the NYTimes. In fact, I am a newbie to cyberspace in general–I am 50, and am learning, perforce. I just started a blog of my own, last night, because I found yours to be so cool. (Do the kids still say cool?)Will you look at mine? It's very brief, so far.

    A lot of it will probably be about the fact that my husband left me for another woman when my breast cancer metastasized to Stage IV. That blew snot rockets, as I imagine your husband-leaving experience did for you.

    I have always kept a journal–a high school teacher once told me "You're a writer; you must keep a journal." I guess blogging will be the same as writng in a journal. Anyway, the whole blog thing is to help me "get over" what happened. Writing has always been, as they tritely say, part of my process, but I've always been afraid of people reading my writing.

    I'm not afraid of anything anymore.

    Something Happened–is that the book that talks about men leaving their wives before their insides go bad and rot?

    My insides are bad now–it's in my bones. Worse is the damage to me, myself.

  35. Sometimes I read your posts and see myself before my marriage, kids, and weight gain. Othertimes I read your posts and wonder how I came to be so unwound. I was coiled right up. before. Before bedtimes, and curfews and the thoughts of the men you didn't have the heart to marry. Now I am unwound. As twenty six year olds on the verge of their third pregnancy can tend to be. Mindless. Without my mind leaking verbal rhetoric on my laptop. Now I am who I never was before. I am open for all to see. Who cares if "all" is just my husbands sarcastic glare- someone sees me! If seeing is believing, then I believe he has come to hate me. The me who no longer can write, wail, or slur my sentences in the drama of singlehood. I know my husband cared for me more when I was someone more similar to you. Someone who cared more and wondered why- and took the time to stay wound up. Ready to pounce, push, and f'ing coil back up.
    I read your writings about how life will be when you are married and with a child? Can I tease you for only a moment? Can I possibly tell you how I relive every choice I made that got me to where I stand now? I will miss my past forever- I will tell no one. I will read your writings and marvel at your brilliance- and I will pretend I have none of my own. I will care for my children that I love and pretend I feel some sort of compassion for my husband. I will live one lie out for the rest of my life- because that will always be easier then the truth.
    And what it my truth?
    That sometimes when my kids are asleep and my husband is immersed in studying, I write fragmented thoughts on my computer and then I erase them. So that no one will know I ever wrote them, or felt them.
    Or needed them.

  36. Remember you used to have links somewhere–either on the blog or your website–to some clothing stores, etc? I think you had them listed as favorites or something like that. I don't know if you know what I'm talking about. Anyway, I was looking for them again & can't seem to find them. Did you remove them?

  37. Lolita is a fabulous book- the writing is amazing, the story sick as hell. great stuff.
    Have you read Cheri by Colette?
    A Heartbreaker. Keep up the good work.
    Love, Rentamother

  38. what to write about-about what you know-you
    the inner santum of your world
    i would be interested in it
    from your personal perspective

  39. How to cope with being an entrepreneur and being a woman dealing with all the responsibilities of running a house hold

    I am in South Africa and I am going through tough challanges, how do the women in the United States cope with the work load.

    Looking forward to your feedback

  40. How about a list of the things that you are scared to write about? I know you seem very open and honest, but if you are anything like the rest of us, my guess is we are seeing the tip of a beautiful iceberg. What do you still hide from your best friends? What do you hide from yourself?

  41. how about not trying to proft from the tragedy in New Orleans! Give because yo want to give.


  42. Profit? She posted for people to click ads(can't say that or the contract is void) if they don't have $$ and she'll donate ALL her $$ from it. I'm sure she does a lot more but if she told you, you'd say she was bragging. Look, she even didn't allow comments on the post to not take away from it. You're an idiot.

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