My menstral cycle isn’t cycling.  It feels like it’s stalling.  Spot ran (and was first seen on March 19).  The 19th was the 17th day of my cycle.  Which means my cycle stalled.  Now, it’s April 18, 31 days later and no spot.  No period.  So I ran into the pharmacy smiling.  "Excuse me Ma’am, but where can I find the pregnancy tests?"  Aisle 7.  First Response (the 5 day early test).  I bought the package of two instead of the one with five, certain I wouldn’t need the rest.  When we arrived home, I shouted from the bathroom, "Not pregnant.  Just fucked up."  Then I flushed.  What the hell is wrong with me?  Stress.  Does stress really do this?  No wonder I’m wearing black; I don’t know when spot will strike.  Typically my cycle is 27 days.  But nothing is typical anymore.  If I were in NY, I’d call my doctor, but now I’m in Texas, and I don’t have a doctor.  I called my New York doctor anyway with a "Help, is this normal?  Should I just wait it out?"  I was put on hold, flipped from one person to the next, worried they’d ask me to come in.  Then, I was told to wait it out a few more days, and to come in for some blood work to see what’s going on.  So I’ll play the waiting game.  It’s like I told my friend Dulce the other night (after she gave me a going away New York, NY departure gift of all things New York including cds, fulton fish market spices, and a "it’s a pleasure to serve you" blue and white cup), "if I don’t get pregnant, it just means more coffee, wine, and sushi for me."  Bring on the spicy tuna roll, yo.