see spot stall

My menstral cycle isn’t cycling.  It feels like it’s stalling.  Spot ran (and was first seen on March 19).  The 19th was the 17th day of my cycle.  Which means my cycle stalled.  Now, it’s April 18, 31 days later and no spot.  No period.  So I ran into the pharmacy smiling.  "Excuse me Ma’am, but where can I find the pregnancy tests?"  Aisle 7.  First Response (the 5 day early test).  I bought the package of two instead of the one with five, certain I wouldn’t need the rest.  When we arrived home, I shouted from the bathroom, "Not pregnant.  Just fucked up."  Then I flushed.  What the hell is wrong with me?  Stress.  Does stress really do this?  No wonder I’m wearing black; I don’t know when spot will strike.  Typically my cycle is 27 days.  But nothing is typical anymore.  If I were in NY, I’d call my doctor, but now I’m in Texas, and I don’t have a doctor.  I called my New York doctor anyway with a "Help, is this normal?  Should I just wait it out?"  I was put on hold, flipped from one person to the next, worried they’d ask me to come in.  Then, I was told to wait it out a few more days, and to come in for some blood work to see what’s going on.  So I’ll play the waiting game.  It’s like I told my friend Dulce the other night (after she gave me a going away New York, NY departure gift of all things New York including cds, fulton fish market spices, and a "it’s a pleasure to serve you" blue and white cup), "if I don’t get pregnant, it just means more coffee, wine, and sushi for me."  Bring on the spicy tuna roll, yo.


  1. Moving is up there as one of the top three most stressful things in life. So it would be common that your cycle is off kilter. Just enjoy your new life and lifestyle and before you know it….a bun in the oven! (or maybe I should say a BBQ on the grill)

  2. When I moved, I went 42 days. 42!!! And I thought I was calm and handling it well.

    It's temporary. You'll be back to normal soon.

  3. Stress really messes up your schedule. And it takes ages for us to even notice. So most likely it was stress from a few weeks ago that is making you late now. No worries, all the happiness you are enjoying now will regulate you soon enough!

  4. For me, the second pink line wasn't detectable until I was already a week late. Five days early? Ha!

  5. Hey Steph,

    You may want to see if your hormone levels are out of balance. I spot in between my periods—and sometimes get that ‘fake period’. (Sorry to be so blunt here…) I also find that stress does cause ‘some women’ to spot. If I go running or lift weights—I spot. Even sex makes me spot!

    I found a solution that worked for me. Take a Centrum multivitamin every day. Don’t skip a day. Make sure that you take it around the same time, and this will help relieve the spotting and level out your hormones somewhat. I am just suggesting this because it helped me. So if it worked for me, it may help you.

    Now go get pregnant girl!!!

  6. Isn't it amazing the different ways we look at our period throughout our lives. When we're nearing puberty, we can't wait to see spot. Then once we have her, we can't wait for spot to go away. But then, when spot goes away, we panic and try to remember if we used protection. Then when we want spot to go away, spot stays. And then sometimes spot goes away when we need her to stay, only to make her go away again. And then when we're of a certain age, we lament the loss of spot and curse the arrival of hot flashes. If I was spot, I'd be pretty damn confused with this push/pull relationship.

  7. If GWB hasn't run Planned Parenthood out of Texas completely, they are an excellent and instant source for all of your questions. They don't just do abortions, you know.

  8. Easier said than done but stressing out over getting pregnant will *not* get you pregnant. As trite as it sounds, just relax. And give yourself a break, you just moved. It will happen.

  9. In case you dont know, spicy tuna is generally substandard, probably old(er) and you probably should stay away if you are trying (or are) pregnant. Hugs and kisses….

  10. that is so frustrating, playing the "when is too soon to take a test" game. You don't want to be too eager and waste all your money on tests but at the same time you are so excited at the possibility that waiting another day is agony. You start wondering if that is tenderness in your breasts or just being sore from testing if there is any tenderness. Do I feel nauseous or just telling myself I am feeling nauseous.. I am in the same boat and each month my period is off by a few days. Usually the reason I end up taking a test is to see if I can drink when my friends are in town, or when I am in LA, etc.

  11. I've had two friends whose cycles were completely off as a result of stress, I bet that's what it is. goodluck!

  12. I'm just commenting, because if I don't no guy will on this post. I say spot, check, hang, chill, f*ck. It'll all work out. It already is.

  13. Perhaps you should try some homeopathic remedies, like Bach flower essences. I would read through the descriptions carefully and order several which suit you and then mix them. Ideally ask an ayurvedic practitioner, but you can self diagnose. They don't interfere with any medication or anything like that.

  14. SK-I could've written this blog… I SWEAR I have been there, done that for the past year and a half. Am I pregnant,the test says no, but I feel pregnant, and what if the test isn't picking up the hormone levels yet, yada yada. In fact, in my desperation for medical advice, one night I was googling fertility words and your site showed up! How random, but meant to be… I wish you all the best of luck…. love reading your daily posts…. SMG

  15. I was going to try to say something witty, in the hopes that I could make you feel better – since I have been there soo many times .. but really all of these other bright and loving women sum it up .. our bodies are in control of us, we are not in control of them and it sucks!

  16. Mmmm, yum, SUSHI!

    Why can't you eat sushi if you're pregnant? Never knew, but then again, never been pregnant.

  17. Remember those turtles in Finding Nemo? Yeah, well you could probably take a lesson from them right about now. You've got plenty on your plate *and* you just moved. Go hang out at the pool or something and relax, Jelly Girl. You're going to be just fine.

  18. Stress is DEFINATELY a cause for spot delay. After a scary accident mine didn't show up for about 2 months. And after about 10 long distance moves in as many years I can say for sure that it would be abnormal if spot didn't do a circus trick or 2.
    Regardless, I'm now the mother of a toddler and the fabulous doctors & nurses always warned me about tuna during my pregnancy & during my beratfeeding days (not more than once a week…if!) because of the high mercury levels.
    It's never too early for a small sacrifice. Enjoy those famous Texas BBQs!!
    I'm very happy for you and the Suitor and send you both the best vibes.

  19. I think it's going to be really hard for me to give up sushi while pregnant…wait, vegetarian sushi is ok, right?

  20. in all seriousness, if a striped tee and white skirt make you feel "too married" how is pushing a stroller and lugging a diaper bag going to make you feel? because a crying baby with a shitty diaper is anything but chic, believe me.

    also, it's "menstrual"

  21. Hi there! I've been reading your blog for some time, although I have to say, its only been fairly recent. Just wanted to tell you that, you've got a great blog (millions of others would have said so I believe).

    I can connect to some of the things that you have blogged about, and there are some which I can't, which is what I love the most. I'm able to have an idea or should I say feel how you feel on things I haven't a clue about (sorry if you don't get what I'm talking about).

    Hope your book gets released in my country (Singapore) soon. Thanks for providing an picturestique view into your striking life. Take care and have fun in Texas! ;)

  22. if you are trying to get pregnant, you should start getting used to eating and drinking like you are pregnant. because whoops all of a sudden and you are. dont worry, it does not hurt as much as you think. and keeping track of the last day of your cycle is very helpful too.

  23. Evidently I'm really bad at being a woman because I couldn't even tell you any of that stuff (cycle, days, etc.) about myself.

  24. my primary concerns, with spicy tuna(besides mercury, which is a good point) are bacteria such as e.coli, V.Haemolyticus, staph, etc. The more you expose the fish to air and warm temperatures, and increase the surface area, the higher liklihood of having an issue.

  25. I've been off the cycle due to stress once. But I wasn't hoping I was pregnant, it was exactly the opposite when all you can think about is how having a baby would be the worst thing in the world, which of course stalls the spot even more! Relax and take a dip in the pool. It'll happen.

  26. Acupuncture always sorted my hormones and got me back into rhythm. Maybe you could try that when you have moved.

  27. With my first pregnancy, I should have known (and leading up to it … I tested for pregnancy EVERY month for about six months convinced I was pregnat) that I was prego because of breast soreness (unusually bad) and really really bad cramping that did not follow with spot. But I still didn't believe it. Five days late, I took the test and it BARELY showed two lines. When I went to the doctor, the urine test was questionable, so they did blood work. I was pregnant, but even five days late it wasn't registering. I did give birth five days early (imagine that) after a very normal pregnancy. So, you still have time before you'll know either way.

  28. Sorry, but I can't resist some unsolicited advice:
    First, don't worry. It really is normal, even if it's not "normal for you". If it's really upsetting, you could find a doctor and ask her for an FSH test. It will very likely be fine and you will feel better. I did when I was in this exact same place last fall. The normal FSH was a huge relief and in my case, things went back to normal on their own after about 3-4 months.

    Well, maybe not exactly on their own. Yay Deb for suggesting vitamins! I started taking Calcium and Magnesium, to be specific, and they TOTALLY helped regulate my hormones (and thus, my cycle and my mood swings). I can't recommend this enough, to all women. You don't need much – I take a multivitamin plus calcium daily, and add a magnesium every couple of days. Amazing difference.

    Caffeine can also be a huge culprit with lots of things.

    Finally, yay daver for mentioning the spicy tuna. Women who are pregnant (or trying) should not consume fish with high mercury, like salmon and tuna, especially when it's raw. The high levels of mercury are dangerous for a developing fetus (and they stay in your body, which is why you shouldn't eat the stuff prior to conceiving either), and the raw aspect is bad for potential bacteria. Sushi and buns (in the oven, that is) don't go well together.

    Good luck getting stuff straightened out. I'm jealous over Austin. Hope you love it there.

  29. Drinking green tea is supposed to make you more fertile so you might want to look into that. Otherwise, I would just take it easy if I were you and enjoy sex with the suitor for the time being. You will get pregnant soon. Keep in mind that Austin summers are HOT and HUMID, so hot and humid you might want to time first trimester morning sickness for the autumn when it gets a little cooler. That is just a thought though.

    Best of luck to you!

  30. I don't know about that, Mamma. Take a pair of gauchos in babyshit brown, add a puke green tissue Tshirt, grab the tyke with the overflowing Pampers, and you're stylin'!

  31. I'm sure you're already aware of this, but cutting back on the booze is probably a good idea, just in case one of the tests is wrong. You're going to freak out if you find out you're pregnant two days after really tying one on.

    And from what I've heard, caffeine is not your friend either, although I don't know what types of limits they set on it.

  32. You moved – you've been stressed and most of all – you miscarried – your body is reacclimating itself. My cycle has been up and down lately – very stressed out – ended up in the hospital b/c of my back last week (lovely…) and my constant every 6-8 week trips to the east coast screw with my cycle even more. The only thing that my gyno told me that gave me any comfort is that my inconsistency (it's Always been a little crazy – never ever ever was one of those 28 day girls) – is my consistency. So – my crazy cycle is the norm for me. Yours will be back to your normal in no time :)


  33. I usually skip the entire month when I am stressed. No point in going to the doctor for this–all they will do is put you on birth control.

  34. I took a test with my third child. Negative. Drank a shitload of wine that night. Took another test three days later. Positive. That kid was swimming in Chardonnay–no wonder he grabs at my glass anytime I'm pouring some.

    And, my daughter–well, she was conceived during a night of many bottles of wine… In fact, we almost named her Rosemount Shiraz!

    Keep on fucking! : ) And don't stop drinking… YET!

  35. Since when does my sister say "Yo"?! And to think that you make fun of me on my answering machine…please. No one even calls me and all of these people read your blog…and you are using words like "Yo". Glad I got the computer…now I can check up on what your are saying to the world…G!!! Love ya and miss ya…hope that Texas is nice. Maybe you'll shift back to the 12th. I always gravitate towards that date and so did Mommy. XOXOXOXO The Ball

  36. All those cycle numbers had my head spinning. When you categorized (is that even a word?) this post "being a girl," I should have been more prepared. Listen girl, me and ex tried and tried without success. She pulled these cycle moves and ate certain foods, and we had to fk a certain way…sheesh. Out of nowhere it just happened. And it will for you. I'd ordinarily tell you to "relax," but…well….YOU know….

  37. Lots of suggestions here, but I like Justin's best…"relax and you're gonna do fine!" Need to get those ciridian cycles adjusted, your routine somewhat established, and then Mother Nature may just decide to drop by and leave you a little something. Congrats on the move!!! Life is an adventure and you need to live it like it is one. Here's to you and The Suitor (katahdin raises a glass) and to the new, soon-to-be addition to your family.

  38. Wow – so many suggestions from all kinds of vitamins, herbs to 'just relax' and why don't you adopt – real cliche's. I wouldn't overdo it with the green tea cos it increases the bodys natural killer cells and you could end up with immune issues, just a thought. Helpful bunch we are aren't we – why, you don't need to go to a doctor!

  39. tranquilla! u're stressed, you 've just moved to TX therefore it sounds almost physiological for me (I am an OBGYN). don't think too much about it right now and everything will turn OK.
    best wishes and keep being like you are!

  40. Hey, fellow Austinite here, if you're on the North end of town (I think you are if my memory serves me right), you should go to Sherri James. She's AWESOME. Love her love her love her. She's up in Cedar Park, so you'll probably want to ask for directions, Did I mention that I love her. She's awesome.

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