all I wanna do…


Look what L.A. has done to Mr. Rooney!  (Sitting beside us at lunch–thank you cell phone camera).  I keep repeating that name.  Roooooooney.  See, now that’s fun in L.A.  But I can only do fun in doses.

All I wanna do…is not have to have fun.  I don’t care what Sheryl Crow croons about.

"I don’t know if I could live here; I wouldn’t be able to be depressed with all these peppy people in their pastels." 
"Why do you want to be depressed?"

It’s not a matter of want.  I like RPM; I’m not talking meds or extremes here.  I just appreciate a gloomy day in a city, sitting in a cafe with a book, watching the rain fall in runnels down the glass.  I like slow days when everything is dark, and you stay inside and watch The Goonies or movie hop at Loews.  I also worry L.A. would make me too obsessed with keeping up.  In New York, you can be bohemian, dress in black and not give a shite, but in L.A., I fear I’d always want more.  I worry it would be in my face so much, I’d grow a sense of entitlement along with more blond streaks.  I’m happy in Manhattan where I can wear glasses, be flat-chested, and have attitude.  I can frown, and you know what?  That makes me smile.



  1. I woke up yesterday morning to rain and it TOTALLY suited the mood I was in. If I had to go to Starbucks and see cheery L.A. people, I might have killed someone. I agree, my solitute is sometimes more comforting.

  2. Flat Chested? Wow. Yes, I love those dark rainy mornings too. They definitely usually fit my mood which is great when it happens. Spooky how we think alike…(especially after the alone post)

  3. When you say "flat-chested", did you really mean "natural chested"?

    Cuz, if women like you start calling themselves flat-chested, your going to steal my A-cup glory. And then where will I be?

  4. Yes, Jeff Jones was (and will always be) Mr. Rooney, but let us not forget he is now a player on Deadwood! Did you ask him if he wanted a Gummy Bear?

    Good to hear that LA would not keep you happy as New York would not be the same without you…..especially for me.

  5. Yes.

    I lived in California for 6 years. I'll sum up my agreement in one sentence: absent angst, people are driven by materialism and celebrity to the exclusion of anyhing even remotely interesting.

  6. I've tried to explain to people why I would never want to live in LA but no one understood what I was talking about. You've nailed it though.

  7. even though i live in LA, i'm the last one to defend it, especially if it's going head to head with the marvelous manhattan isle. i will, however, chime in to say that it's VERY easy to be depressed here, because when you stare all that prettiness (which is just altered ugliness, right?) in the face day after day, you start to find your own rainy days, no matter how sunny it is. and, on a technical level, it's been really nice here lately weather wise, but when it rains, it pours, and no one knows how to deal with it, so the whole city goes into this shock trauma frantic mode. it's unreal. but give me new york any day over this plastic place.

  8. You are not happy here, so why does the comparison matter? LA is better than Manhattan on some levels, as are Rome, Paris and London. Overall though, LA has too many people that have never been to the big time, but they think they have. That's the issue. They think Vegas is "travel" and chain-owned entities for dinner is fine dining. Just not worldly enough, but you do have the beach and weather.

  9. Oh PLEASE let's not have the "NY vs. LA" argument. If you're a wanna-be, and keeping up is all you care about, you'll do that no matter what city you live in. Believe it or not, it is possible to live in Los Angeles and NOT work in the entertainment industry (shocker!). It's also possible to NOT have fake boobs, drive an SUV with chrome wheels or have any other kind of plastic surgery.

    L.A. has a lot more to offer than Beverly Hills and eating at The Ivy.

    I have family in NY and have been there many times. It astounds me the amount of money you have to make to even FUNCTION in New York. You couldn't convince me for one minute that there isn't pressure to make money and look beautiful. I think NY may have allowed a more bohemian attitude at one time, but now it just looks like one big shopping mall.

    Off my soapbox now…

  10. My bank account is the perfect example of wanting more. However, that leaves reason to be depressed.

  11. Having grown up all over the west and lived in various places on the east coast since 1991, currently Boston, there is ONE thing I have noticed that is different about the people between the two places. Huge generalization coming: People in California are less reliable than people in New York and Massachusetts. Maybe I should specify – well-educated liberals. Very liberals. I didn't know any Republicans in Cali, except for the parents of my friends.

  12. P.S. I get you on the frown thing – and the superficiality of the west. Even if there is a materialism present in both places, those in the east seem much less interested in creating a healthy and peaceful facade.

    Recently I've decided to move back to California (northern), mostly because I am healthier when I can wander outside at will. This happens more often when it is gorgeous outside and I can go anywhere, on foot or bike – or in a canoe or my subaru.

  13. Delurking to comment on this…I flew from NY to LA for a few days last summer because I was sick of New York. But, three days in that sunny hell hole and I was ready to get back :). I missed the things you mentioned in your post–the freedom to be gloomy, or to enjoy an overcast day, the ability to find happiness in NOT being falsely blonde/big chested/connected. When the plane landed at LGA, needless to say, I was ecstatic. And, I immediately felt the veil of affluenza lift. Enjoy the rest of your trip! NY will be happy to have you home.

  14. "In New York, you can be bohemian, dress in black and not give a shit…wear glasses, be flat-chested, and have attitude…"

    If you ever tire of New York – Seattle welcomes you.

  15. The exaggerated state of consciousness in LA is indeed a bit daunting. However, NY seems infinitely more threatening to me.

    This is probably because I lived in LA (and Newport Bleach) for a long time and got used to it and was comfortable. And I never have lived in NY. It has always seemed to me to be what you describe: hard to keep up.

    It's like the devil we know isn't as scary as the one we don't know.

    For excellent desserts, try Sweet Lady Jane on Melrose. Famous cake-maker. Like Sylvia Weinstock of LA. Melrose and La Cienega. You guys could walk (it's downhill there, uphill back) from Le Mondrian and not feel guilty about the 1500 calories you've consumed.

  16. I usually like your writings but not today. You write about LA being obsessed with keeping up, breast implants and being pretty – things you can also get in New York.

    Look where you went, Dolce, the Ivy and the Mondrian. You chose celebrity hot spots that we read about in the National Enquirer and are on every Hottest 10 list about LA.

    I agree with you that LA has a horrible problem with the sense of entitlement but there is something oddly cliché about not liking LA if your from NY. I would have thought better of you.

    I agree with you that LA has a horrible problem with the sense of entitlement but there is something oddly cliche about not liking LA if your from NY. I would have thought better of you.

  17. I thought L.A. was kind of tacky.

    At Star Shoes one night there were some B-listers out– everyone else was pretending to be too cool to care while at the same time primping and strutting and trying to be seen. Lame!

    A guy was hitting on me – then he started berating me b/c he thought I was holding out on him as to who does my eyebrows. I was like – dude I am not ever from here.

    Then a boy asked me to buy him a drink.

    I was like – La-La land indeed!!

  18. I've been to NY and I've been to L.A. I have to say I like the food (other than pizza) better in L.A. (Claim Jumper's and In-n-Out Burger and the like). NY was awesome for shows and bars as I recall.

    I always felt Miami was much more pretentious than either. I mean Miami does have the most plastic surgery, per capita. However, I think it's just one of those things – you go to a big city and you can find all of it if you look for it – the good, the bad, and the ugly.

    As much as I love NY, I still prefer the warmth over the snow and ice.

  19. I am a long time reader, and this is the first comment I have ever posted. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to agree with Jennifer's comment. Your review of L.A. is disappointing and short-sighted. If you went to places like Dolce, The Ivy and the Mondrian you were absolutely asking to be assaulted with celebrities and wannabes and a peppy sense of entitlement. I am an L.A. native and I don't go near those place because there are way too many other places to go and people to hang out with in L.A. that are not shallow and image obsessed. If you feel like wearing black here, go right ahead. If you let others dictate what you wear, then that's not an issue with L.A., that's an issue with your own personal security and self-esteem. People do and can wear whatever they want in L.A., whenever they want to because the weather is that great all the time (unlike NYC) so they go for it year round. Don't criticize people for taking advantage of that. Don't get me wrong, I love NYC too. I go to Manhattan every year for weeks at a time and I appreciate the differences between the 2 cities and what they have to offer. But, NYC has it's own "hot spots" that attract the superficial celebrity types-so I'm sure if those were all the places I visited when I went to NYC, I might have a negative opinion of the city. It's way to easy to criticize L.A. if the "Hollywood" ritzy portion is all you surrounded yourself with when there are soooo many other areas in L.A. to visit and explore. I mean, at the very least, rent a car and drive down PCH and stop somewhere for some good Mexican food, if you want only 2 reasons why many people prefer living along the Pacific rather than the Atlantic Ocean.

  20. la is definitely a "want more" city. but so is ny, it's just different wants. i think every major city is- disparities are so vast between the haves and have-nots.

    i suggest san francisco if you want to wear black and have attitude. but i am biased.

  21. first off… I love LA… just don't think I could live here year round… though I would consider living the bi lifestyle… bi-coastal, that is. Yesterday we drove to malibu on pch, though we did not exactly stop in the bario… shutters and the viceroy got our business… I loved marina del ray. geoffrey's was on PCH and glorious. I just like the change of seasons… the drastic change of seasons… the smell of fireplaces outdoors on ny streets. I just don't want to be around so many shiny happy people all the time… all yoga healthy. I love New Yorkers for their cynicism. okay, I am now off to eat a double double animal style on mulholland dr.

  22. I had the same feeling about L.A.; How could anyone be depressed in a place like this? I loved it though because I spent a lot of time in Hermosa Beach. Redondo, Hermosa and Manhattan Beaches seem to be filled less with the materialistic aspect. I could be wrong. It's hard to get an absolute feel for a place simply from vacation.

  23. I totally agree.

    Some days you just need to be sad. I love sitting down when it's raining, drinking a glass of wine and listening to blues. Sometimes I cry and sometimes I don't, but it feels fabulous.

  24. Ditto!!….to ~jess~

    I used to PRAY for rain in LA….so I felt justified in stayin IN….drinking coffee all day, reading trash, & enjoying melancholia!!

  25. san francisco is the place. you can be whoever you want and wear whatever you want. no one gives a shit.

    if you want pretentious, try the south. we still have debutante balls down here.

  26. if this book and picture deal doesnt work out, you could be a papparazzi in LA. the only celeb i saw in person there was don knotts. i think i called him Mr Furley. haha

  27. Have to agree about how it might be difficult to live out there…just got back from a week in various locales including Los Angeles, Compton, City of Commerce, Manhattan Beach, Hermosa Beach, Torrance, Seal Beach, Newport Beach, Laguna Beach, and Laguna Hills. All nice places…except Compton. I think it is that we are so used to our home environment and often grow comfortable in those environments. The one thing that I have to say is that Californians can't drive worth shit. They are way too unpredictable…especially on 405.

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