you make me wanna la la

I can’t orgasm or sleep unless I’m horizontal.  So I’ve never joined the mile high club or slept on an airplane.  Even with Benedryl or Ambien, I’m up, which leads to reading.  I’m always armed with a stack of my faves: In Style, Bon Appetit, O, Living, Photo Digital, and Vogue.  I could lie and add The New Yorker to the list to sound smart, but I won’t.  The iPod will be loaded with Rhett Miller, my lap with an opened hardcover of Prep (thanks skjess), and beside me, the women I love to love. Sweet chocolate covered Kimmy and pink in the night Jenny D’Light. We’re taking a leave of absence and heading to the left coast in a dozen days (we’re taking restaurant and bar recos).  L.A. brace yourself– apparently, many of the fabulous (including my editor) are seeking refuge in your nip and tucked land. Hmmm.  It’s food for thought… especially if the food is from In ‘N Out. 



  1. So does this mean you really are doing a 'carrie' and going to LA to discuss the movie version of your book? better watch out for those over zealous matthew mcconno-hey (er?) types tho.

  2. In 'N Out kicks butt. I miss it all the time since I live in St. Louis now, however, I'm going to Vegas soon so I'll be having some of that tasty delicious fare before I know it! Everyone needs to experience In 'N Out.

  3. I can't orgasm vertically either. And I've never tried to sleep vertically, definitely not on airplanes because they make my ears hurt too much for sleep.

    I find myself in your position all too many times.

  4. I can't sleep vertically either : actually I can't sleep in any vehicle – car, plane, train, it doesn't matter. And there is no In 'N Out in the UK. But we do have Cadburys chocolate, so it all balances out.

  5. I normally watch movies on planes when everybody else is sleeping. This is the reason I love Virgin Atlantic.

  6. Yeah baby – Animal Stylee…My friend was so adamant I have one before leaving CA that she drove through on the way to the airport. It has haunted my taste buds ever since…The Animal Style is a MUST.

  7. You have never been seated or above someone while oral sex is being performed on you?

  8. In N Out puts all other fast food to shame. I live in L.A. and eat there as often as possible. In additional to "Animal Style" you can also have it "Protein Style" with no bun…. but why would you do that?

    When you're here in L.A., be sure to try a restaraunt in the City called "Jar." in West L.A. Awesome food, very cool retro decor.

  9. I LOVE In-N-Out…eat it as many times as possible while in Cali…as for L.A fine eats and drinks- I always check out when I'm traveling. It's written for people who love restaurants/food by people who love restaurants/food. Have fun…

  10. Hi. I've never really commented on anyone's blog before, but I must say that In-N-Out is overrated, in my opinion. Good, but not awesome. I'd take a Carl's Jr. Bacon Western (they put onion rings IN THE BURGER) over it any day.

    Also, a restaurant suggestion: Get reservations (after 10 pm) to eat at Koi and have their spicy tuna on crispy rice roll (best item on the menu).

  11. It makes sense. Orgasms take total concentration and total abandon…if I tried to orgasm standing up I'd just fall over.

  12. If you do In & Out, make sure you get the curly fries, cause the others they hjust changed to are like cardboard. The burgers are great and they do "keep it simple."

    Hey, come by the O.C. Laguna is great.

  13. I can sleep vertically (pat on back), and horizontally and diagonally and every other which way. I once fell asleep on a bench at the Lenox Mall in Atlanta after a late night out partying. And although I have slept on planes normally it's horizontally when I hog all the middle seats and pull the armrests up.

    Ditto on "In 'N Out kicks butt."

  14. Ask for your In n' Out to be made "animal style." Do this. They grill onions and the sauce and slap it on the burger. Doesn't cost extra. Supposed to be sort of an LA-insider thing that everyone and their dog knows.

    I am an insomniac of the worst kind. I wake up with glasses askew, light on, magazine stuck to my sweaty forehead, and a pile of books with which I cuddle.

    XOXO, La Cabrita

    P.S. Go to Asia de Cuba and get the Bay of Pigs. It's a dessert, not pork.

  15. Your blog seems INCREDIBLY lame. The fact that you are getting a book deal is extremely funny.

    I guess it just proves the point that our country really is quite dumb.

    I can see why your husband divorced you… The picture w/ beyonce is pretty funny as well… nice one starf*cker!

  16. in and out rocks!!! Double Double please!! We just got one here in Bay Area

  17. I spent a summer in L.A. (I'm a New Yorker) and must say it is the cheesiest place on earth.

  18. Damn. Wished I had known about Animal Style when I lived in Phoenix. Love In N Out. Have a fab trip. Bringing any Plantation music?

    Pknut. She's not into the oral thing.

  19. Sunday nights at Guys. It's Jazz night and it's called "Guys with Ties." Dudes aren't allowed in without ties. It packed with the hot and not, celebs and wannabes. It's a great LA scene for vacation purposes. Enjoy.

  20. In & out rules. Wish they would expand.

    Check out Duke's in Malibu. Solid seafood and even better view. Check out the Border Grill for MExican. Rockenwagner in Santa Monica. Diaghilev is a neat upscale place serving Russian in West Hollywood.

  21. There's a restaurant on 3rd Street between Beverly Center and the Grove called Toast. It's a little outdoor cafe/bakery, and I go there at least once a week. Make sure to save room for dessert!

    And for the best outdoor ocean view restaurant, Geoffrey's in Malibu. A little expensive and a long drive up PCH, but totally worth it.

    Have fun! I love living out here (in Santa Monica) even though I truly am an east coast girl at heart.

  22. Just got back from LA two days ago – if you think the NYC to LA flight is rough, try flying LA to Melbourne. Argh! 15 hours in a plane is not a normal thing to do. *sobs*

    In & Out is fab. But to really cap off an LA experience, go to the Westside Pavillion mall and sit up on the railing like Tai does in Clueless!

    Have a wonderful trip! :)

    BTW I'm reading Prep at the moment. Not bad.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.