Locks of Love is getting 10 inches of Little Miss’s lovely tresses. The sun kissed strands of summer are now locked away, at the ready for another child. There’s almost always a story involving a hair salon. Mine’s better and involves a mother in law, a spray bottle, and some scissors that some might characterize as “happy.” Or downright exultant. A joyous Monday to one and all. And now, the full story on shorty.
Abigail’s hair was arch your back long, and with long comes tangled. I was fine with it. And so was Little Miss until it was time to brush it. “Mama, I want short hair like Natalie’s.” Natalie is a girl in Lucas’s classroom with a blunt blond bob that suits her (think Vivian, as portrayed by Julia Roberts, sporting the glamorous Carol Channing look). “Are you sure?” I ask, shaking my head. “Yes, I’m sure.” Phil’s parents are in town, and Phil has asked how I’d feel about letting his parents take Abigail for a haircut. “Well, it’s silly for them to take her for a trim. I mean, last time we took her she left the place looking exactly the same. I can give her a trim.” Unless.
Abigail and I click through hairstyle sites for kids. Her hair looks stringy and limp and always manages to get in her eyes (because she yanks out ponytails and unravels her braids). So, what’s the best cut for a girl whose hair is fine and thin? All I know from fine and thin is the lines on my face. I’ve always had a thick mop of hair full of volume. Thin fine hair, when left long, doesn’t look healthy. It looks hanging and a bit sickly. According to hairstylists thin fine hair looks healthiest cut short with lots of layers to give the illusion of fullness. This sounds good… in theory. After combing through images, I pick my way through our family archive and land on these photos of Abigail’s hair once upon a time ago (shown below). And I love it.
Abigail’s Hair, 2008 (This Photo Is NOT Recent)
I hit PRINT. I sit down with my mother-in-law who agrees that the cut Abigail has in the photos suited her, looked healthy and precious. “She’s in good hands,” she tells me. “You’ll just have to trust me, Stephanie.” I’m unable to go to the salon because I have a Girl Scouts meeting. Abigail is excited to go with her grandparents. Though, in truth, I’m not sure she knows what she’s in for. I’m nervous. I continue to click through online images. “Will you stop?” My mother-in-law says. “Enough. She’s in good hands. Now stop already.” It’s only hair. It’s only hair. It will grow back. And if they cut it so it looks as it does in these photos, the photos they’re bringing to the salon, I will be thrilled.
When I return home from the Scouts meeting, I cover my eyes for the big reveal. In those moments I am imagining her as she was in her earlier photos and can’t wait to see her. “I’m ready!” Abigail sings. “Surprise!” When I open my eyes, my chest fills with a swollen feeling—a mix of nausea, grief, and a forced concealment. “Look how beautiful you are!” I say as she twirls. I mean this, of course, but that is some serious boy hair.
I want to cry, but there’s Abigail, truly happy. And, there’s my mother-in-law measuring my reaction. And, there’s Phil, avoiding eye contact altogether. “She has a boy haircut,” I tell my mother-in-law once the kids are asleep. “No, it’s not. Not at all. It’s a short cut for a girl.”
“No, I’m pretty sure if you came home with Lucas and had given him the same cut, it would look completely appropriate. For. A. Boy.” I want to ask how it ended up tapered to a point at the nape of her neck, like a boy’s cut. But, it’s really not her fault; it’s mine. If I was that fragile about it, I should’ve been there.
I can’t imagine how this will grow out. How long will it take? Most obvious to me now is how I’m the only one traumatized here. I prep Abigail for the worst, asking her how she’d respond if one of her classmates told her they didn’t like her hair. “I’ll say, ‘so?'” So? Because the only opinion that matters, when it comes to how she feels about herself, is hers. The hair will grow out, but this attitude, right here, is something I hope she fights to hold onto, something she never outgrows. ——————————————
As for me, I’ve got the Monday Mantra on repeat: It’s just hair. It will grow back. Deep breaths. One salve: Little Miss is upstairs wearing a tiara. At least the girl can accessorize.
COMMENTS:
Leave a Reply
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
The short hair is great on her. She’s a beauty.
Whyd you do that? I have to tell you, I think its really extreme for a child that age, from a mother so reluctant to cut her own hair. She does look like a boy and I cant imagine why you would make that decision when she likely had no say in it or true understanding of the consequences. This is a decision an older child or adult should make. Oh, and you should donate through the Pantene program if at all.
Why through Pantene and not Locks of Love? Is there something I don’t know about Locks of Love? I prefer it and have donated myself (along with my 5 yr old daughter, sister, sis in law) because it’s focused towards children.
how beautiful she looks! the sign of a beautiful face is being able to not hide behind the hair! and what a great lesson she’s learning :)
This makes me sad.
She’s still adorable. And at least it can all go to a good cause. It can grow out over the Texas summer when she’ll be glad to have short hair!
What a little beauty!!
I don’t think it is a boy cut and it is very evident that she is a girl. She’s very delicate and I think this cut shows that off. She looks gorgeous!! In fact, I like her new cute more than I like the old photos. There’s something spunky about it.
I wore my hair short from age 6 to 14 and you know what, it was tapered to a point at the neck a good deal of the time. As long as she’s happy, who cares? All this gender-specific bullshit is damaging to a kid.
I know why you feel sad. I have a little girl who is almost two. I cut her hair ONCE and my husband got upset! The good news is she looks like a little girl, is happy, well adjusted and confident.
I think it is precious and lovely. The best part is now you will get to enjoy a variety of different style-stages as it grows.
She looks absolutely adorable! Short hair looks best on a beautiful face, and Abigail can definitely carry it off. Not to mention that she loves it, and that is all that matters. I can only imagine how freeing this cut will be during a hot/humid TX summer. Lucky Little Miss.
I’m sorry, but I think she looks lovely with either long or short hair. I haven’t met Abigail yet, but everything I’ve heard you say about her suggests to me that *no one* is going to confuse her for a boy. (And no one is going to put Baby in the corner, either.)
I have a tip: Dont introduce concepts like “what if the kids dont like the haircut?” No reason to have her even consider this, its your own baggage.
And I agree with above – – there are ways to trim and layer a girl without hacking it all together. This whole saga is weird IMO.
Your daughter is stunningly beautiful. I think she looks like a pixie, not a little boy. Hair grows, and thankfully, she didn’t decide to cut it herself into the proverbial reverse mohawk that kids usually do around that age!
I think it is quite chic.
Your daughter looks absolutely precious with her short hair!
In what narrow world do we really still care about boy hair or girl hair – it’s 2011, you know? The most confident and gorgeous of women wear their short cuts proudly, or they have in the past.
I hope Abigail holds on to being so independent in spirit, and she will never let herself be forced into that dark, suffocating “appropriate for girls” box.
Maybe I’m fonfused, but didn’t you say the pics are of a haircut she had in the PAST?! You’ll have to post a pic of the new haircut. I think if she loves it, that’s what matters. And yes, its only hair.
Oh i see! The first pic is the new cut. It’s still only hair!
I think she looks absolutely adorable with her new cut.
When I was young (probably around 2.5?) my mom had my hair cut short. Only it was the 80s, so it looked like I had a fade in the back. My grandmother completely freaked out and told my mom I looked like a boy.
To this day my mom says it was her favorite haircut on me.
I hope you are not serious.
A kid’s mind is troubled enough without us parents trying to instill in them our own insecurities.
And, do you really think it is necessary for the little girl to use makeup? You, of all people, should know better than to mess with her body image.
Anyway, take a trip to Europe and you will see plenty of beautiful women with short hair – as someone has already noted, it is très chic.
Short tapered cuts are chic on WOMEN. It doesn’t look particularly age appropriate for a little girl, at least not in a traditional sense. And she is not wearing makeup. Must be the saturation of the photo. And, her hair might not grow in quickly, but it is growing on me. It’s almost a statement: I am pretty enough to pull off anything.
I did the same thing to my middle daughter’s hair last summer — stringy, thin, ick. So I took her to the kiddie salon and the stylist said if we wanted to get rid of the mullet, we had to bite the bullet. So we did. And I was horrified at how short it was and lamented so on my blog. But the funny part is, her very short, stacked bob suited her completely. It’s easy to style and looks great on her. She has the same face shape as your daughter, so maybe when it grows out a little, it will be super cute for her too. My stylist says it should take about three months to grow out again.
OMG! it’s byootiful! I dont know if it’s the angle of the photograph – but it’s awesome!
“Most obvious to me now is how I’m the only one traumatized here. I prep Abigail for the worst, asking her how she’d respond if one of her classmates told her they didn’t like her hair.”
Since you *are* then only on traumatized, maybe you should consider what’s going on with you. It might help if you adopt your daughter’s attitude and just say “so?” You’re doing her no favors by making a big deal of what others might think of her looks. She’s full of great beauty and always will be.
I totally hear where you’re coming from. And maybe you’re right. I don’t know. I said what I did to her as a passing question, grouped with a few others: “Do you want to wear a barrette to school to show off your new beautiful haircut?” “Are you super excited for everyone to see you?” I asked not to push thoughts on her but to gauge her preparedness. As a parent, I want to equip my children with good communication skills and to prepare them for things, when I can, so they have time to consider what an appropriate action might be. For example, I’ve brought up bullying, asking what she’ll do if she sees someone else being unkind to another person… or to her. I bring it up not to assume that she’ll be a witness or that she’ll be bullied, but to prep her and teach her. I asked her what she might say if anyone said they didn’t like her hair because I wanted her to feel confident and have the emotional vocabulary to handle the situation. I could be wrong, but I really don’t think I was making my issue hers. Last time I checked, I’m possibly the last person in the room who worries about what other people have to say about me… or any of my family for that matter. Just sayin’.
Ok, I apologize about the makeup comments (I thought you were freaking out and putting lipstick on her so that everybody could see she is a girl).
Glad to hear the cut is growing on you! She does look beautiful, and it is great that she is pulling off a “non-traditional” cut with such confidence.
I am sorry, I meant to reply below your comment.
reminds me of a funny memory of my little sister’s boy-cut style back when we were little. she must have been a tad younger than little miss, and i was almost 4 years older. our father took us to the thanksgiving day parade in houston very soon after my sister’s long thick ringlets had been chopped. the three of us were standing next to another family with two young girls. the other girls had cotton candy, and their parents encouraged them to share with my sister and me. one of the little girls defiantly said she would not share with a boy. from then on, my sister made sure to wear these tiny little barrettes until her hair grew-out.
I am a woman who wears her hair short, and has for many years because it simply suits my face. For the life of me, I cannot understand how people equate short hair with BOY. A short cut does not mean ANYTHING– it is a hairstyle FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
I think Abigail looks adorable, and the most important thing is that Abigail likes it and is happy. Let it go……
I think her haircut is adorable. She’s gorgeous.
I LOVE IT! I think it looks better than the older pictures you posted. The new picture is beautiful, both the photography and the subject
My daughters were blessed with hair the color of spun gold. Not kidding. Middle daughter has thinner hair, wispy and curly – ridiculous to brush. Oh – the tears we shared brushing those golden locks. Little one has thick, glorious tresses of golden locks. Impossible to get through.
About 7 years ago, my ex-husband’s 2nd ex-wife decided that a hair cut for my darlings was appropriate…called me from the ‘salon’ when she’d gotten them all prepped and excited. They each came home shorn…Locks of Love got two 14″ golden braids…and I bit through my tongue. Still bites.
I’m happy to report that as a junior in high school and a freshman in college, they have both regrown their stunningly beautiful long, golden locks. They look back and shake their heads that their heads were turned by her.
One more thing (sorry to go on and on)…when I was 10 and decided I should cut my hair to look like Farrah Fawcett (ahem…that was in 1976 and feathered was IN), I came home with a pom head and my dad shook his head slowly and said ‘I always liked long hair on little girls’. That was it. A thousand years later, I still have long hair. Suits me.
By the way – she’s beautiful.
She looks gorgeous in the picture, but I can see where you’re coming from. The good news is, you were prepared for short, just not THAT short. It would take ages to grow looooong again, but it shouldn’t take that long to grow to a length suitable for a style you both will love. I’ve seen some VERY unfortunate boy cuts on girls, and this is not one of them- she still looks like a girl, undeniably. Just realize she loves it, stock up on barrettes and headbands, and make her an appointment with someone you trust in a few months.
It IS short. I have two daughters and I would have freaking flipped out. BTW, I showed my husband and father and they thought it was SHORT too. It will grow out-I predict by the end of the summer it will be to her shoulders if you want it to be. Maybe grow out the really short layers in the back and add more to the top???? I cut my youngest’s pretty short when she was 2 and do you know what kind of comments I got? “Did she cut it herself?” :(
And I totally do the questioning, often negative things to my daughters. It is preparing them and I don’t see anything wrong with that. Kids suck. They say inappropriate things at times, and hurtful rude things at time as well. It’s role-playing. No different than practicing for being appreciative at a bday party.
I think it’s awesome that she loves it. Hopefully you can sculpt it into something a little softer that you both love.
Breathtaking, in the BEST possible way. I LOVE LOVE LOVE it. Before I read the post I assumed it would be all gushing about how great it was. So sorry you don’t think so! She looks amazing.
Your daughter is gorgeous, loves her new cut and doesn’t care what her classmates think about it. You’ve raised a confident, beautiful kid–obviously, you are a very good parent. I can absolutely understand your shock, but what’s important is how she feels AND that her hair has gone to a good cause. If she changes her mind over time, she can just grow it back.
The hair is elegant, suits her little face perfectly. She looks perfectly graceful, and yes, hair does grow back. Letting her make this decision for herself was an intelligent thing to do, developmentally and for her own sense of self worth. Great parenting and beautiful child!
Of course you care and want to prepare her as if she were you but honestly, she seems to love it! And if any kids her age say anything, they may be victims of their parents’ coaching. Kids are kids -and yours is gorgeous as she is! Hair does grow but hers is as cute as she is. Let her enjoy it and don’t worry a bit.
“I want to cry and scream.” Wow.
I feel that a lot of emotions and anxiety are being placed on this haircut, and it is upsetting to read. Her hair looks beautiful. She IS beautiful.
The cut is ADORABLE. I absolutely hate seeing young girls with messy, stringy, long hair. Growing up, I always had short hair. In all my photos, I look neat and presentable. She’s too cute! What a great attitude she has!
I agree that the cut is darling and the first thing you see when you look at her are her beautiful, huge eyes. I see so many little girls with messy, stringy, long hair and it looks so uncomfortable. She shines.
It IS short. Now that the obvious is out of the way…
She’s beautiful and can actually work it because she has a very delicate and feminine face. I suspect it will have grown out enough in a few short weeks that it will not appear to be TOO short. Right now, it seems too short. If she were older, I’d be in love with this look.
“It’s almost a statement: I am pretty enough to pull off anything.”
You’re sending the message that beauty is what counts, above everything else, and that’s a dangerous message to send to a little girl. That immediately opens to the door to What if she wasn’t “pretty enough”? Why not focus on something other than her appearance?
I think she looks adorable—but if you’re still bothered in a few weeks, why not schedule a trim for yourself and bring Abigail in with you. (call your stylist first and tell her/him that you think her current cut is too boy-ish, and you might want a touch up for her)When you’re there, ask your daughter if she’d like her hair trimmed, too —if she does, well, there you go. (and let her know that short hair has to be kept up regularly)
3 words: Emma Watson. Adorable!
I think Abigail looks adorable and thanks to you being a nurturing mom, she has a wonderful sense of self. Plus, donating the hair is another valuable life lesson. It’s all good, Stephanie.
It is really short. I would have possibly passed out if my daughter came home with such short hair, mostly bc I’m a long-hair person. I’m also a control freak and don’t allow anyone else to comb her hair…as in, I’ve hauled myself out of bed with a sinus infection, bronchitis, and strep throat simultaneously so I could fix her hair before my husband drove her to school.
that being said – she has such a lovely, delicate, fairy-like face I don’t see how anyone could see her short hair and think “boy”. She looks so precious and sweet and the haircut seems to accentuate the delicate quality of her face.
I hate the mindset about hair people like you have. Hair length should not be a gender or age thing. When I look around and see most girls basically wearing their hair the same length and the same way every day, long flowing locks going many inches over their shoulder it makes me upset. I’m a very big normal is boring person and seeing all these girls basically acting the same way and wearing the same styles is just boring. Now this person’s ass feels like screaming and crying over some f****** limp fluff when her girl is absolutely enjoying it. Why force the f****** girly stereotype on to every girl that gets born in this f****** country. I never liked girly hair and once my mom got it cut she said didn’t look good and my dad didn’t like it but I loved it. It was cut into a boy bun style. Eventually my hair grew to the point that it was going down my back when straightened(I’m black). I begged my f****** dump head mom to get it cut. A couple months ago I got my haircut to a girly short(mid neck when straightened. I wasn’t satisfied and snipped a couple inches off. my mom to decided to fix it but it still was too long(chin length). Yesterday I made the decision to cut my hair down to boys length (above my ears when not straightened and about mid ear when straightened). Today I sit here writing this with a short pixie cut. I’m still planning to get it shorter. My mom currently doesn’t show any signs of knowing that I cut it. I know eventually I’m going to have to reveal it to her hopefully I can end up getting a better haircut (I am a amateur hair cutting teenager). HAAAAAAHHHHH HHAAAAAHHHHAAAHHAHHAHAHAHHA dumbass! I know the way I’m typing makes me sound like a rebellious emo tomboy;). I also have an undercut by the way. I love my new haircut and I still have the femininity that I identify with and I have telltale signs that I’m a girl such as my very visible breasts and my higher-pitched voice. Stop holding on to your kids hair. Stop instilling gender stereotypes into your kids head. Of course I am a teenager and I’m only partially developed but we are not as dumb as you think we are ;).
Seriously? Her hair is cute. She’s four, right? Get it together, Stephanie. This isn’t about HER vanity, it’s about YOURS. I am pretty appalled that you would react to your gorgeous daughter’s new haircut with this amount of panicked insecurity. What’s the worst that can happen? Your daughter feels beautiful, why can’t you celebrate that?
This post turned my stomach. She’s a gorgeous girl who donated her hair to a child who can’t grow her own. THAT should have been the focus of your post. It’s a beautiful act and I’m willing to bet that half the girls in her class are sporting that cut by next June.
In any event, no one will mistake her for a boy, and who cares if they DO? A lot of boys have long hair now and are mistaken for girls. They get over it. Let her express her individuality and let her be free, at least for a while, from the horrible twin traps of vanity and insecurity.
And, by the way, that first cut wouldn’t have been repeatable, the texture of her hair at two was obviously completely different than it is now.
i’ve been a silent reader so far but i just have to say that i agree wholeheartedly with this comment. i honestly feel like you are pushing your own insecurities onto your daughter. but that being said, i love your honesty and i think Abigail looks gorgeous with short hair :)
it’s.just.hair.
When she’s 15, she’s going to come home on her own, with it dyed blonde, or jet black, or purple….just to see the look on your face and prove that she’s independant. Of all ways a child can have some control over their own environment and choices, hair seems a pretty easy one to give them for starters :)
The first thing I thought of is that you are just way more honest than most people. You are entitled to your feelings and your preferences for your daughter’s hair and it is nothing like the pictures of her when she was much younger. That being said, she is a beautiful little girl with breath-taking eyes and does look good because of that. That hair cut would be a disaster on most children. Love all the recent blogs and appreciate all the time you put into them.
I’m just so surprised she or Lucas hadn’t had a go at it thus far. My youngest, who was 2 at the time, came out of her room with a chunk, missing from the back of her head. I ran into the room to find her twin 4 year old sisters giggling away. “WHY did you cut your sister’s hair!?!?!” “She told us to!” “She can’t talk!”
After hyperventilating, I chanted as you have, it’s only hair, it will grow back. As I chanted when she was four and cut her own bangs into Cindylou Who bangs.
When she was 13 and dyed her blonde hair, pitch-black. It’s only hair, it will grow.
Sigh. See?. It could be worse.
Abigail is adorable. With her pierced ears & tiara, there’s no mistaking her for a boy.
We should all be so lucky to be able to pull off that look. It is gorgeous. I agree with the commenters who say you really need to do some serious thinking about your feelings on this. She is young enough now that she might not catch on to your feelings, but if you aren’t careful, you’re going to pass on some insecurities that I’m sure you don’t intend.
As someone else mentioned, when I saw the picture, I thought it was going to be a ‘look how beautiful my daughter’s new haircut makes her look’ type of post. It was disappointing to see it go the other way. I know we can’t completely control our gut reactions to things, so I don’t blame you for being shocked. But, now you have the opportunity to step back and consider some of the comments people are making in order to take a deeper look at your own feelings.
The other thing that struck me with the post is how you BLAME your mother-in-law so much for this. I know that she was the one there with her, but once the stylist starts, it is hard to know how far they are going to go or to interpret what the cut will look like AS they are cutting it. Heck – we’ve all had a bad haircut when we, OURSELVES, were watching it happen.
Truthfully: I like the old photos, but I LOVE the new cut. I think the stylist knew what she was doing and that your mother-in-law recognizes a fresh, fun haircut a little better that you are right now.
She is unique and loves it. ALL IS GOOD. Just have fun with cute little barretts and enjoy being able to see that beautiful face without all the extra hair to distract you from it :-).
Laura
Stephanie, I really, REALLY vehemently fucking hate short hair on girls. But Abigail looks totally adorable. She can absolutely pull it off! The shock from long to short can take time to adjust to. She looks great; she’s got the right kind of face for this type of haircut.
My husband just looked at Abigail’s picture with the new-do & proclaimed, “Oh, how cute!” Stephanie, she looks adorable and if you don’t like it, repeat after me, “hair grows. Hair grows. Hair grows.”
This post has been rolling through my thoughts for days now, and what I keep thinking is, ‘Almost our entire lives, as girls/women, our bodies are judged by others… it’s so sad that at four years old, Abigail’s appearance already has its critic.’ It makes me resent, so very much, all of those who have looked at me and judged (good or bad) over the years.
My niece goes to a private school here in Manhattan and a ton of the little girls have short hair. It’s super cute. What’s the big deal? I am baffled by all the “boy hair” comments from both you and other commenters. Really? That’s still a thing? That and all the “my hubby/Daddy/whoever likes long hair” shit? Makes my skin CRAWL.
She’s adorable (and what if she wasn’t…?), she’s healthy, she’s happy. And I hope she’s not picking up on your fixation with her physical appearance. A haircut like that lasts a couple weeks, but feeling like your mother is obsessed with your physical appearance is BAD NEWS!
Seriously? What makes you think I have a FIXATION with her physical appearance? Her hair is cut off. I’m going to notice. Is it the end of the world? Of course not. And did ya miss this part: “Because the only opinion that matters, when it comes to how she feels about herself, is hers. The hair will grow out, but this attitude, right here, is something I hope she fights to hold onto, something she never outgrows.” THAT is what matters.
@Alice, well that was quite the comment! I have read Stephanie for a few years now, and while I don’t always agree with her or see things as she does (I grew up in Texas and LOVE it there, and she grew up in New York and LOVEs it there), I would like to think that she would agree that as mothers to a girl, we want them to be the better versions of ourselves. My daughter is 15 and a freshman in highschool. She is not popular. She wears braces and glasses and has a touch of acne as I did. She has yet to have her first boyfriend (mine was in elementary). But she is beautiful and she is confident and she LOVES her life and is so completely loyal to her friends. She truly is the better version of me . . . . but not all kids are unfortunately. They are mean and critical so I read Stephanie’s blog with different eyes as you. First, whether you like it or not, we all have preconceived ideas. She left the house with a vision of the haircut in her hair. She is perfectly right to be caught off guard when she sees something completely different. It doesn’t mean she is shallow, isn’t in love with her little girl, or is a bad mother. Not one bit! Also, the fact that she had the conversation with Abby about how she would respond to the kids at school shows that she is fully aware that children can be cruel and wants to make sure her little girl is not only prepared for differences of opinions but also more confident than the beautiful chubby red headed girl that went Fat Camp. Alice be careful to judge other people before knowing their story. I had a mean old woman make a very ugly comment concerning my husband’s weight yesterday thinking he was overweight because he overeats when in fact, we almost lost him to kidney failure 3 years ago and the steriods he has been on for 2 1/2 of those years has taken a toll on his once trim athletic frame. Please don’t be mean
@Alice, well that was quite the comment! I have read Stephanie for a few years now, and while I don’t always agree with her or see things as she does (I grew up in Texas and LOVE it there, and she grew up in New York and LOVEs it there), I would like to think that she would agree that as mothers to girls, we want them to be the better versions of ourselves. My daughter is 15 and a freshman in highschool. She is not popular. She wears braces and glasses and has a touch of acne as I did. She has yet to have her first boyfriend (mine was in elementary). But she is absolutely beautiful and she is confident and she LOVES her life and is so completely loyal to her friends. She truly is the better version of me . . . . but not all kids are, unfortunately. They are mean and critical. So I read Stephanie’s blog through different eyes as you. First, whether you like it or not, we all have preconceived ideas. She left the house with a vision of the haircut in her mind. She is perfectly right to be caught off guard when she sees something completely different. It doesn’t mean she is shallow, isn’t in love with her little girl, or is a bad mother. Not one bit! Also, the fact that she had the conversation with Abby about how she would respond to the kids at school shows that she is fully aware that children can be cruel and wants to make sure her little girl is not only prepared for differences of opinions but also more confident than the beautiful chubby red headed girl that went Fat Camp years two decades plus earlier. Alice, be careful not to judge other people before knowing their story. I had a mean old woman make a very ugly comment concerning my husband’s weight yesterday thinking he was overweight because he overeats when in fact, we almost lost him to kidney failure 3 years ago and the steriods he has been on for 2 1/2 of those years has taken a toll on his once trim athletic frame. Please don’t judge.
I think it’s darling. I’d still be irritated with the mother-in-law though, because clearly, this isn’t what you authorized. Also, I completely understand your feelings… my twins were three when one of them climbed to the counter for a pair of scissors, held out the side of her long hair and clipped a giant chunk of it to the skin. I was changing the laundry over and had left them happily transfixed in front of Dora. I would love to say that I held it together but I sobbed like a FOOL. And took her for a pixie cut that still didn’t conceal the shearing. Her hair is full and gorgeous now at nine, and down to her waist… she won’t even entertain the thought of anything more than a trim. I ended up loving it short, ha.
Well, I have what I hope passes for good news. As a kid, I had exactly Abigail’s hair, except mine is jet black. Although my mother never made me wear it too short, she had the exact same opinion: thin and long is stringy and unhealthy looking. I’m not sure about the Little Miss, but one thing about my hair was that it grew like a weed. And, on the plus side: Layers can be done on longer hair and your hair changes texture when you get older. Honestly. I still have thin hair, but it no longer looks stringy when long. Something to do with growing older or not having baby hair any longer. Still thin, but fuller looking. I’d bet hers get less thin too.
The tangles stay forever though.
P.S. I think she looks adorable!
My daughter still brings up the fact that I had her in a “Prince Valiant” style haircut for two years when she was little! Seriously, your daughter is adorable and does NOT look like a boy. Let her enjoy it and you may even find that you like it. And, it will grow, too!
I’m just now catching up and seeing this!! Precious, precious, precious. She is such a beautiful child and that cut is perfect with her eyes. I love short hair on little girls.
Mainly because my little one is a nightmare when it comes to brushing hair in the morn.
Hope all is going well at sxsw!!
I think she looks absolutely adorable!
I had tears welling in my eyes while reading this post. I cried like a damn idiot when I walked into the bathroom to find my 3 yr old with a pair of scissors in one hand and a handful of her golden-blonde curls in the other.
While Abigail’s cut is very boy short, she has a such a feminine face and looks absolutely beautiful. Her picture immediately reminded me of Emma Watson and her new haircut. I’d give anything to be able to pull off a pixie cut.
When my sister was 2 or 3, I remember my Grandmother (my mother’s mother, who have never gotten along) chopping her (very curly) hair, just as short as your daughter’s is now. The only difference was, my sister loathed the cut. My mother was furious, naturally, and it was a war. But you have the right attitude, especially since your daughter loves it. My sister wasn’t scarred for life, and it’s a funny story now. You have the right attitude. How is she (and you) doing with it now?
If I saw her with you on the street wearing pants – or at least something not overtly feminine, I would’ve said “Hey what a cute looking kid. What’s his name?”
BUT hey it’s just hair. It will grow back. It’s not like the short haircut is gonna turn her into a lesbian butch or anything.
She looks amazing!! I am not just saying that – really, the haircut is absolutely adorable!! Your daughter is so precious that she would still look adorable with a shaved head or a mohawk.