i don’t like Kiptyn: will Jillian marry Mr. Ed?

ed jillian
Jillian & Ed

Jillian, I love you. I do.

Whenever anyone begins with proclamations of love, they’re about to go somewhere ugly. And I am. I’m about to get ugly. But first, I’m going to be pretty: I love neurotic men. Love. I want to marry them and have their babies. Except, oddly enough, I married a man who’s not the slightest bit neurotic… and therein lies my lesson: sometimes what we think we want and what we actually want are different things.

The Ugly: Jillian, you are a horrendous judge of character. And maybe all of us are when we’re that invested, when we want something so much we can’t see anything that might be in the way of what we want. But I’m here to say, you’re in it too deep, and you need some perspective, some distance, and some blog. You need to sneak away from the flamenco lessons with Kipton and read a blog or two. Because really–and you’d know this if you’d read Straight Up And Dirty–the man needs to love the woman a little bit more than she loves him. It’s just the way it is. Period.

This goes for all of you. Anyone who’s with anyone where she might just find herself saying, "Maybe he’s just out of my league" needs to do some growing up. It’s like the Little Engine That Could. You can make it wherever you want, but you’re not getting there without local stops and painfully long delays if your attitude is can’t.

I liked Kipton, but now I don’t. Yes, I’m speaking about a man I’ve never met. I’m speaking about a nice guy. But there are nice guys all over the place. Let him go be nice someplace else. If the man isn’t willing to risk it all for you, he can’t be your all.

Yes, there’s something about being real. About being honest. Absolutely. But at the beginning you need someone who’s willing to play out a Percy Sledge song– a man who’s willing to sleep out in the rain if she says that’s the way it ought to be. Pick the safe bet. Pick the guy who makes it clear that you light up his world. Don’t pick the cynic. Don’t pick the realist. Don’t even pick the dreamer. Pick the guy who chooses you no matter what. Then… learn to love him back.

I didn’t pick the safe bet. Because I wouldn’t want to spend time with him on a deserted island, but that’s all you need… someone you can exist with. There might be fights, there might be ugly, but at the end of the day, there’s trust, there’s the deep knowing that he’ll always be there, adoring you first, knowing that you’ve got a partner through it all.

All that said, I like Ed.

Here’s the thing. If any of us were dating Ed, and he left, only to return later, with the, "I didn’t realize what I had until it was gone" excuse, would we fall for it? Hell to the es-yay! But is that the thing to do? Don’t so many of us sit around thinking, "I want a man who wants me when he has me, not one who has to lose me & miss me to realize he’s lost a good thing." We’re all kinda cheering for a situation we’d never want to trust if it happened in our own lives.

3 YEARS AGO: Grinch
4 YEARS AGO: Cookie Puss
5 YEARS AGO: Little Miss Independence



  1. I just want her body. Yeah, if I could look like that in a tube top bikini, I would have (had)all the confidence and patience to play all the stupid mind games and BS that go along with dating and trying to find “the one.” I don’t care what anyone says about inner beauty, great personality, intelligence, blah, blah, blah at the end of the day, it’s how thin you are. period. (sorry, got off subject. kinda)

  2. I’m goingot have to agree-she has shown to have a little bit of skewed judgment i.e. wes mothereffer. I can see what you’re saying about Kiptyn totally….and I didnt really dig his family too much. ED, ED IT PERFECT.

  3. Not a single mention of Wes? Even from a fellow Austinite? Or are you just taking the high road??

  4. I agree with missnlove. Thank the LORD Wes is finally gone. I was a fan of Kiptyn until tonight, now I’m pulling for Reid…a man I hardly noticed until this episode.

    Agreed though, Jillian IS a terrible judge of character. And Ed…talk dark and handsome. De-lish.

  5. Yes! Man…I was trying to put my finger on it, but really, you voice it perfectly. I don’t like how Kiptyn is always maybe-ing his love with Jillian. He’s toeing the line, and it’s something she likes! I feel like this season of The Bachelorette needs to dive more into Jillian’s psyche and figure out what is causing her to make these weird decisions. Wes should have been gone years ago. Ed is so sweet with those doe eyes and boyish hair. I’m going to be biting my nails when she makes her final decision–I don’t want to be shaking my fist at my television screen, damning Jillian for the decisions that may haunt her for the rest of her life.

  6. Didn’t it bother anyone else that Ed didn’t look at her the entire time he was talking to her at dinner? He seems like a great guy, but can he be that sincere if he can’t look her in the eye?

    Congrats to Wes for being a huge ass on National TV. Love how he accepted the room key after admitting he did have a girlfriend. Classy.

    1. Yes!! I noticed that too, and it made him seem insincere, especially when combined with the fact that he left only to return (drama). I’m pulling for Reid at this point.

  7. I have to agree. Jillian is AWFUL at judging character, simply pathetic at it really. I think she needs some time on a couch. That said, I really like both Reid and Ed. Kiptyn’s family was….interesting, but I don’t think she would really fit in with their cookie cutter life. There is something about Reid that’s adorable. Maybe because he’s ok with making himself a little vulnerable with all his neuroses. Ed is just damn handsome and I like the grand gesture, but is that enough?

    I have to comment about Wes. What an a**hole? He believes any publicity is good publicity but he certainly turned off a segment of his audience who may have otherwise purchased his dopey album.

  8. I haven’t been watching but my mom says what about Reed and Jake?
    and Yes, I agree with the man loving the lady a tiny bit more.

  9. I love Ed. I think that whole thing about him leaving “for his job,” only to return later, was created by the producers for extra drama. As was Jake’s return and “warning.” Give me a break. I also think the show was edited to make Wes look even worse than he actually is.

    Jillian is so likable and seems so “real.” But I think she is a fool to be so invested in a proposal by the end of the show. And I think any guy who would propose is nuts too – unless he doesn’t place much value on engagement. The history of the show clearly demonstrates that the process of meeting someone on this show is steeped in fantasy and once these “couples” enter the real world, they find each other less than enthralling.

    But anyway, Ed is totally my type, especially due to his resemblance to Jeffrey Dean Morgan. Reid is cute and funny. Kiptyn is a bit vanilla and I did not like his parents (or how they were portrayed). That “taste test” was ridiculous.

    1. I think they did heavily edit Wes to show him as an undercover cad, but they didn’t put the words in his mouth.

  10. If the man isn’t willing to risk it all for you, he can’t be your all.

    Too true and yet so hard to swallow. Your paragraph following that is precisely what I needed to hear today and every day. Thank you!

  11. The obvious bottom line is that nobody can or should fall in love to the point of a proposal in a matter of weeks. It is impossible to know someone well enough in that amount of time to make a lifelong commitment. The whole premise is ridiculous. It’s junk tv, for entertainment purposes only. That said, Jillian is indeed a horrible judge of character. She has said numerous times that she loves a ‘bad boy’. That may explain why she is in the desperate situation that she claims to be in. I must give her kudos, though, for not sleeping with all of the candidates in the ‘fantasy suite’. She’s the first contestant that hasn’t lowered herself to slut level at this stage of the game. Now, Wes….he is a whole case study in himself. This greasy cowboy is a narcissistic liar. I truly hope that he cannot find a buyer for what he is selling. I can’t believe that he thinks the negative publicity he gained fom this show will help him sell his mediocre music. He is repulsive. I would pity his girlfriend, but she is obviously in on the scam. That goes for his family, as well. They were also willing to lie in order for Wes to gain notoriety. Yuck.

  12. Agreed with you 100% until you mentioned Ed. He doesn’t love her just a little more than she loves him. He probably went home only to realize he was fired and then thought “shit…let me see if Jilly will take me back.”

  13. i love you! everyone needs to hear this: ‘pick the one who chooses you no matter what’

  14. None of the remaining guys would like Jillian outside of this competitive setting. Sorry to say but true. No way she gets married out of this. She needs self-esteem therapy. Pronto.

    1. why? i think she’s great! all women have some insecurities. scratch that…*everyone* has at least some insecurities some of the time. she hasn’t seemed overly so to me!

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