surgery scheduled


Phil’s mother is flying in tomorrow morning. She’ll be picked up at the airport, then dropped off at the hospital. To wait with me. "No one should have to wait alone in a waiting room," she said. Dr. Natale said he could do another ablation, but really, he said, "It won’t help all that much at this point. With heart function that has deteriorated as rapidly as yours has, it’s unlikely the drugs causing that. And an ablation won’t make that much more of a difference now that that your EF is so low. When you were in the 30s, I thought maybe an ablation could get you back to the 40s, but now that it’s so low, an ablation at this point won’t do too much to help with that." Phil could have another ablation, then go in again, a week later to get an ICD (Implantable cardioverter-defibrillator) Bi-ventricle device, but once Natale spoke with Phil’s heart failure/transplant specialist, they all decided, the best course of action right now is for him to get the internal defibrillator with the third lead (the new bulkier device capable of shocking him should his heart ever get all funky). It’s happening tomorrow. If he needs another ablation, he’ll have to wait six months (as to not risk dislodging one of the new leads). Phil walks around the house asking what I want for dinner. "No, what do you want for dinner?" I ask. "Yeah, that’s right! It’s my last meal! I better make it a good one." "Lobster, then? I’ll make them." "Yeah, that’s all I need. Kill something in a pot, or knife it between the eyes, right before I go under the knife. Not too good for my Karma." "Tofu scramblers it is, baby!" "…" "I’ll get the wine opener."

4 YEARS AGO: Pearls

 5 YEARS AGO: Proof, The Past, Hamptons Traffic



  1. Best of luck, Stephanie. I'll be sending all the good vibes I can muster in Phil's direction.

  2. We'll think of you and Phil. Sending good vibes. Let us know if you need anything. :)

  3. Wishing you only the best. I will be sending positive thoughts your way tomorrow.

  4. Happy you don't have to wait alone. Fingers crossed and sending lots of positive energy. Hope the Tofu will be delish! ;)

  5. Positive thoughts to you, Phil, his Mom and the entire family.

  6. Good luck tomorrow Phil. I am glad someone will be with you while you wait Stephanie.

  7. I will pray for your family today. Tell him to get lots of hugs from those babies of yours and be strong. Good Luck and keep us updated.

  8. wow – Stephanie. A big cyberhug for you and and Phil. I'll probably get criticized for saying this, but I found in a similar but different situation with my daughter I kept myself distracted by "redecorating" the waiting room while I was waiting. Looked much better when I was "done."
    I don't know you but I have been in that waiting room.
    Best of Irish luck to you.

  9. I'm so sorry you and your family are going through this. Sending a big internet hug and lots of prayers your way.

  10. LOVE to you, Phil… and SK so glad you will have family supporting you. We can send all we can from afar, which all the good energy helps yes- but you need family to lean on.

    As annoying as the phrase is Phil's family sounds like 'good people' :)
    It's a little scary this is all happening so fast – the day after you met with the doctors. You can handle this.

  11. You and Phil will be in my thoughts! Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.

  12. Sending you lots of positive thoughts, virtual hugs and warm wishes that everything goes smoothly and turns out great for Phil tomorrow.

  13. Stephanie,
    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Two years ago my sister, who was 33 at the time, had open heart surgery. I know what you are going through. I know it is terrifying. He will be in good hands. And know that people across the world are thinking about you and sending good, healthy, strong vibes your way.


  14. prayers, always, and we'll be sitting with you 'virtually' in that waiting room tomorrow too. Phils mom will be in my prayers too, I hope you have comfort in each other tomorrow.

  15. Hoping all goes smoothly and this latest procedure helps. Hang in there Lady, you are strong! You CAN do this.

  16. Sending thoughts of grace and wishes for courage and luck to you both. We're thinking of your family!

  17. Stephanie, your best friend is going in tomorrow and you are scared to death. I have been in your shoes. I have also been in your shoes of being in therapy at the same time of a major surgical event. He will get through it, you will get through it, you both will get through it. Once Phil's recovery is well underway and things get back to "normal" life will get back to "normal." It will be the happiest days of your lives. Love, luck, happiness and prayers to you and your family. God Bless.

  18. It will be hard to believe in the moment but so many of us will be willing good luck tomorrow. If you get scared, close your eyes and know that hundreds of countless strangers are wishing your family luck, prayers,thoughts,energy and for the top Suitor of them all,Phil,nothing but Good Tidings. Phil may have a weak heart but that same heart he has is overfilled with love for you and his children. It is apparent in what you write. No great love is easy.
    This is just another twist in the long Hemingway tale of you and Phil. Best of Luck and all the best for your family.

  19. The first paragraph got me a little teary-eyed.

    Stay strong, my friend.
    Sending lots of positive vibes.

  20. sending my good thoughts toward you and Phil and the beans. i wish him the best and a miraculous recovery.

  21. lots of hugs to you and your family…i will be keeping you guys in my thoughts..

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