putting your foot (and finger) down

"Baby, where’s my external hard drive?"
"Oh, I spoke with them today. They said they tried to recover your stuff, sent it out to a specialist, and they couldn’t. So they’re–are you picking your nose?"
"I’ve got a crusty."
"If it’s not already on the UPS truck, it’ll take two to three days. Are you still picking your nose?"
"I think I pushed it up there, and now I can’t reach it." After some silence I add, "Does it disgust you that I pick my nose in front of you?"
"It’s not a question of disgusting. You just don’t have to do it."
"You don’t have a boogie in your brain, so you wouldn’t know, now would you?"
"I’m not having this discussion."



  1. sometimes you just gotta pick, blow all you want it's hanging on and you HAVE to go get it. funny funny

  2. Gross, really. I wouldn't pick my nose in front of anyone (although I do it alone).

  3. I love posts like these – patches of conversations. I've been reading yours for a couple of years now. You and some of my other friends inspired me to start a blog.

  4. I hate crusty boogers! Sometimes you just gotta go after 'em, no amount of blowing into a tissue will do.

  5. I know Stephanie, some times you just have to pick! Hopefully without an audience.

  6. I love the fact that there is no indication about which lines are whose, but you can just tell.

  7. Haha.
    I love picking my nose..it's so satisfying!
    Thanks for giving me a laugh this morning :)

  8. You remind me of my hubby who is so comfortable with this kind of romance that sometimes I get so grossed out. While he's very comfortable around odors, snot, mucus, and grabbing food out of my plate, I'm not.

    I do have a question for you: Sometimes you say that you need romance to stay alive…and I do believe that passionate romance from the beginning does die away with a certain intimacy. It's not sexy to see my hubby spit out a ton of mucus or just spit and then want to get it on.

    I'm not saying that I don't believe that gross intimacy is also special, because in some ways, I do think its special.

    But which do you prefer? Do you need to have that intimacy of buggers, snot, and mucus with your husband because of your authenticity (totally acceptable) or do you prefer some of the passionate romance from the beginning to stay afloat? Or do you think both can coexist peacefully in a marriage because of the strength of your bond?

  9. Perhaps that could be a new medical condition. "I believe she has Boogie in the Brain, sir. If I had a nickel for every time I saw one of these senseless cases. It could all be stopped if people were just taught correct picking technique. Oh, the humanity."

  10. Carolina, is my BF your husband's brother?? ha ha. My BF is really grossing me out lately — he starts to kiss me and then has to stop to burp because the air gets trapped or some crap like that. Then he wonders why I turn him down for sexy time. And don't even get me started on the clipping of toenails when we're watching TV or the butt scratching — after which he won't hesitate to reach elbow deep into a box of Wheat Thins. What I put up with in the name of true love :)

  11. Please email me your address so I can send you some tissues. I'm in debt up to my eyeballs, but I will go further into debt to help two more people be brought up thinking fingers should not go into noses.

  12. I'm anxious to see Stephanie's response to Carolina's comment/question. Just this past weekend, I had to have a conversation with my guy about him not being romantic enough with me. I feel as though because I'm his "buddy", maybe the romance and his desire to woo me is not as strong. We are best friends, spend all of our time together by choice, I fart and burp and do all of that stuff with him, and although I haven't crossed the "boogie in the brain" line, I don't think I'd be embarrassed if he caught me digging for gold.

    And all of this has raised the question that if I am his buddy, can I also be the romantic sx goddess that wants the candles and the oils and the kissing and the cuddling and all the girly stuff. He loves me just the way I am, and sees no problem with the way things are, actually enjoys when I let one rip, BUT… is it possible to be passionate, romantic buddies?

  13. Hilarious! I would totally do the same thing in front of Boyfriend! Oh wait, I have…

  14. Hahahahah! Carol's comment made me laugh with her parenthesis.

    My kid's poop doesnt gross me out but his boogers sure do.
    However, I do pick my nose and it does feel good, and I do roll the booger between my fingers into a tight, hard little ball and throw it at the wall. I like the way it sounds when it's hitting.

    Do you poot in front of him? heh

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