the oscars has the word “scar” in it for a reason

Don’t you just love Ellen?  Yes, yes I do.  "But some people really don’t like her," my mother insists.  This cannot be so.  How can you hate on a girl who likes to dance and talks to the animals?  Oh yes, I just said "hate on a girl."  "Yeah, but she didn’t make me laugh." I don’t care.  I love Ellen because she’s always nice, mostly always.

A small part of me wishes I were watching the oscars with my friends in New York, with sushi, watching the snowfall, pouring too much wine,  bashing the outfits.  The bigger part of me is happy to be here, speaking to Linus, whispering in his ears that this is the last award show we’ll watch together. "And would you look at that, baby?" I say to him as Jennifer Hudson appears on screen, during the pre-show, in her techno-mod what the hell? silver shrug, "she looks like the one black Jetson."  And Cameron Diaz looks like she shopped at Cache.

As for the montage on writers, it made me feel inspired, as if I were watching Finding Forrester or Wonder Boys, or strangely enough Good Will Hunting (even though it’s not about writing at all).  It made me feel better seeing all those actors (playing writers) crumpling up their own work.  See, I’m not the only one. Now, along with everyone else, I’ll have to see Pan’s Labyrinth.   "Is that, who is that Stephanie?" My mother interrupts after seeing the screen pan to Jerry Seinfeld.  "Oh, I know, Nicholas Cage, right?"  And then I recall the opening montage of nominees thanking their mothers.  "It’s the guilt," they say.  "I’ll be in big trouble if I don’t remember to thank my mother."  I love this.  I love when nominees play the love card, using their final thanks up, raising words to those who raised them.  To my beautiful wife, who really, tolerates me every day and moves me, inspires me, and supports me.  I think those little pieces of paper should just be banned.  No more lists people, just always remember your mother.  And my favorite part is always the dead people.  I love watching the montage of the dead.  Mr. Furley is almost as good as Ellen. 



  1. I take it that your mom is in town. Isn't it great to have your mother around? When I was a teenager, I would scream at her that I hated her, that I would never be like her. Now, she is the only person who I would trust (with the exception of my husband) with my daughter. She knows my ways, which are her ways. We both bandage boo-boos, grill cheese sandwiches, and make hospital corners on beds the same way.
    I am my mother's daughter. Dammit.

    In years to come, I hope you, your mom, and Abigail have traditions all to your own. :)

  2. I used to despise Ellen. I don't know why now..but now, I love her. I think she is so damn funny. What the hell is wrong with Cameron Diaz these days..that hair has got to go. Loved Reese. She looked beautiful!

  3. Yes, she dances and talks to animals, but she's also an unapologetic lesbian, hence some people really dislike her. Glad your mother's there.

  4. I've been a fan of Ellen's since seeing her for the first time on HBO back in the early 90's, late 80's.

    I was sad for her when they cancelled her first show and she cried at her press release, with her mother by her side.

    I was ecstatic about her getting her own show again, and even happier as the ratings grew, and she proved how invincible she is.

    She's always come across as such a good person.
    I might have been one of the few but i loved her hosting the Oscars and I hope she is hosting next year too.

    Reese looked incredible, Leo was so fucking hot.
    Jennifer Hudson looked like she was fake crying when she accepted her Oscar.

    Ryan Seacrest was pretty funny at the pre-show on E!

    "Wang? Oh yes lots of wangs here…"


  5. Coming out of lurkdom to agree with you. I love Ellen. I find her warm and funny. Now Rosie, that's another story.

  6. The whole time I was waiting for the montage of the dead. I don't know why I like that, but I do.

    I half-wished I was watching on the phone with my ex-best friend. But, then I realized she is my ex-best friend because we grew apart and we stopped watching the Oscars on the phone a few years ago.

    Cameron's dress looked like stuff people wore to my 7th grade middle school graduation in 1987. She has no boobs and could have wore a dress with a scandelous neckline and she picked that strange flappy thing. Her hair was a mess too and made her face look fat- although I liked the color.

    I love Ellen. She's genuine.

  7. Here's the thing about Ellen – she's funny and it's at no one else's expense – not many comedians can get away with that. She just doesn't pick on folks, even when they deserve it. And she's a great humanitarian, has done a lot for New Orleans, etc.

    I was really torn between wanting Alan Arkin and Eddie Murphy to win, wishing the Academy would allow for ties when they've got amazing performances. I absolutely loved Little Miss Sunshine and have watched the DVD several times since receiving it as a Christmas gift. If you haven't seen it, do – you owe it to yourself.

    And I don't think Jennifer Hudson was fake crying. I think she's just taken aback by all the accolades, but she deserved the Oscar – her performance in Dreamgirls was amazing. I am glad, though, that she lost that horrifying metalic shrug before she took to the stage.

  8. Oh thank goodness someone else liked Ellen last night. They NY media is just bashing her today, saying that she was too "G Rated" and that she was completely upstaged by Jerry Seinfeld. They are also RIPPING her outfits. Whatever. I thought she held her own nicely.

    Cameron's dress – come on girl!!! Work with us! Take the sun-kissed CA look like Reese is, and run with it! (The Cache remark had me cracking up though-so true!)

    NY misses you too, but maybe you didn't miss the snowy mess that was our night last night, and will repeat itself tonight. Do me a favor, and look into the Austin music festivals – South by Southwest, and there's one more whose name I cannot remember. They are supposed to be really great, and I would love to see you and the family running around taking pics of that!

  9. My favorite part of the awards shows is bashing the outfits! I especially liked watching Jay Manual on the E-network get catty about Jessica Beil's 80's prom dress. That guy is my gay soulmate.

  10. oh my, Stephanie, it makes me tear up everytime you mention giving your dog away. Before my son was born, I had a cat that I'd had for many years. Everyone told me to get rid of him, that he'd hurt the baby…you know, etc., etc. You might as well have told me to get rid of my first child. We kept the cat and for the next 3 years they learned to get along. I think in all that time the cat scratched my son once, when he pulled his tail a bit more than playfully. We lost that cat just after my son turned 3 and I vowed not to get another animal for a long time. I bet you can guess the next part. For the Christmas after his fourth birthday, my son got Mommy a new kitty. He looked just like the last one and at the time was the last thing I thought my heart needed. I cried for days every time I looked at the little fluffball. But, then I saw how much my son loved him, my heart began to soften. It is now nineteen and a half years later. I divorced my son's father the year after we got the cat. My son graduated from Wake Forest University last May and is now working in the DC area for the Discovery Channel. And Mom? Well, I'm still here in NC, with the sweetest little friend sleeping in my lap every night. Yes, the little cat outlasted the husband, the emptying of my nest and is giving me more love and companionship than I could ever have imagined when he arrived. Love finds a way to make things work.

  11. Cameron Diaz is just busted. She always is. I was so surprised when the commenters said she looked daring and beautiful. I thought she was one of the worst dressed with her too sunkissed skin. And Jennifer Hudson? What the hell was up with the jacket? I mean you're winning an Oscar, you don't wear the club presents eighties night jacket.

  12. Ellen is awesome, a very easy person to watch on TV. The oscars were good this year, glad to see you had a moment to sit down and enjoy them.

  13. I like Ellen from the time she was first on a Fox show as a secretary. Her next show was even better, until it became a weekly re-run of Ellen looking for the perfect gf, and then no one watched. Once she realized that no one cared about her orientation, she came back better than ever. IMO, only her and Billy Crystal can host a show as big as the Oscars. I remember her hosting a NYC show that had been canceled twice. She came on and said, 'welcome to the 52nd, 53rd, and 54th showings of the ???, followed by "I am Ellen Degeneres, the comic formerly known as the lesbian". You knew right then that she was back.

  14. I like Ellen too, but sometimes her halting delivery can get annoying. Overall, I thought she did a good job. As for her being an unapologetic lesbian, I don't think anyone who doesn't like her for her orientation would be swayed if she apologized for it.

  15. Ellen DeGenuine. I agree. I waited for ameximals to translate. Nay. Herd them yawner acceptance speakers. Butt. Who gives a hoot? I did. Snips, blips, b/w, color presentations of writing, editing, photography, sound, adaptation did it for me this year. Anything but the usual suspects — trailers of nominated films. E'd out. One word had my teenager race out of her room. Myspace.

  16. Ok Cache is I know cheesy, but it can have some nice high-class looking dresses ocasionally. I think Cameron is just such a ditz and her face is too puffy to carry the lovely artsy dress she had on last night.

    For anyone who cares, Pan's Labrynth is probably, for the past 20 years of my life, the best movie hands-down I have ever,ever,ever seen. Some told me they thought it was violent, but I cried each time it won an award last night– and if it wasn't for that damned German movie, it would have won Foreign (that's Ok he was hot the german who accepted it). I told my mother I'm naming my firt-born Guillermo if it's a boy because of the director/ writer's unbelievable, unimaginable, imagination. I cannot even describe, in clean coherent concise words, on this blog comments, what a moving piece of art that movie was. I hope some of you see this movie. Run Run Run. I still cannot stop the wonderful feeling I have from it.
    (ps I watch tons of movies, review everything, I am not someone who goes to the movies 2-5x a year, plus I don't love love fantasy/ children's elements in movies).
    Mi amor Guillermo!

  17. Pan's is amazing. I was forced into watching it. But after it was over….my gut wrenched for hours. Which was a good sign. Really inspired me to get back to the business of writing.

  18. Hey Sandi, there is no need to mention Rosie on a thread about Ellen. We don't care if you prefer the less threatening lesbian talk show host over the other one.

  19. JoeyB – The name of the show Ellen was on where she played a (man crazy) secretary was called Open House. She was hysterical then, and she still is. As someone else said, her humor is never at anyone else's expense.

    And, yes, Jennifer Hudson needs a stylist, but ya gotta admit that it's pretty impressive; she went from losing American Idol to winning an Oscar in a NY minute. However, I have to say that she looked like she came thisclose to having a wardrobe malfunction while she was singing in that red dress.

  20. Oops – think I lost my post. I'm going to try again here.

    LOVE LOVE LOVE Ellen. She is genuine, kind, funny and just a joy to watch.
    Loved the dresses on Reese, Gwyneth and Celine Dion.
    Agree with Julie about Leonardo – He is ON FIRE!!
    Agree with y'all on Cameron Diaz – hate the hair, hated the dress and not really too fond of her. She must have hated that Jessica Biel looked so hot – as always.
    And although I loved the Balenciaga that Nicole Kidman was wearing, WTF is the deal with her eyebrows??? She looks like a freakish alien. Check them out here:

  21. I'm glad I'm not the only one who enjoys the memorial montage. I always get this little pang in my chest as I watch and clap along with the hundreds of celebrities in the audience. And there's always at least one person who I didn't know had died…this year it was Peter Boyle (of Young Frankenstein and Everybody Loves Raymond). I'll miss the cranky old guy!

  22. i don't have a tv, and i didn't see the oscars. but (!!!) i happened to see a picture (online) of sasha baron cohen at the event. all i can wonder is, how did such a fine-looking man pull off such a dorky-looking character as "borat?"

  23. Pan's Labyrinth is a great sleeper…I'm so glad that anything but Little Miss Sunshine won for Best Picture… Ellen was the best part of the show.

  24. I love(d) EllenDG. Show is amazing. In the Netherlands though, they prefer showing the Tyra Banks show instead of Ellens' talkshow. ???HUH?? Whazzup with that? Think Tyra Banks is one of the few talk show hosts that doesn't understand it's about the guest telling the story, not about the hosts' experiences…..sidetracking.

    Clint was cute getting that last line wrong. Shame.
    Leo is SO yummy. What's with the slick comb back though, no no no!

    Go see Pan's Labyrinth, am-aazing!

  25. I love Ellen. I think she's probably a delightful person all throughout her life.

    Hands down – the most beautiful woman there – Nichole Kidman. Good lord – the woman is absolutely breathtakingly stunning. And the dress….to die for!

    Cameron – brown hair – ick.

    Gwyneth – stunning – yucky color dress. Would have been better in red. Or black. Or pink. Or green. Or…you get my point.

  26. Love love LOVE Ellen. Thank you for your comment about Cameron Diaz and her dress. Why have all the "fashion experts" loved it? It was hideous and her hair was worse.

  27. Oh, and the best thing about Ellen is seeing her with her "Mama". Her mother is so supportive of her and they obviously love each other very much.

  28. I read on that Eddie Murphy "stormed" out of the Oscars shortly after he lost to Alan Arkin. I truly hope that isn't true, as I'd like to think someone of his age and stature would be the bigger man. Besides, you have to know that your chances of winning are somewhat limited – getting nominated for an Oscar means you're up against the best of the best.

  29. I feel you on this post, two-fold – the love for Ellen (she IS genuinely nice, isn't she? I mean I don't know her but I love that she dances anywhere she goes – I wish she had done a dance routine) and the love for the dead people segment – my husband loves that. he was wondering where it was, hoping they still had it, because: "It's important to honor those people". So presh.

  30. this has nothing to do with the Oscars, I just didn't know where to post it…your blog ruined the book! I started to read about Abigail and Lucas half way through the book! I was reading the future while in the past, very strange! So now I finished the book, is Stephen Phil? But the gravestone? That was so meant to be!

  31. I've loved Ellen since she was a receptionist on a real estate sitcom…many moons ago. Can't remember the name, she was the best part of the show.

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