catchin’ yankees with honey

The moving truck broke down.  Our stuff doesn’t get to Austin until Thursday.  We’re sleeping on the Aero Bed with one top sheet and an old mover blanket they use to wrap furniture.  There’s no television, no cable, no Internet.  The Suitor turns to me last night, at 10:30 PM, and says, "So what the hell did people do before there was electricity?" 
"They knit or read."  I don’t remember the last time I did either without something else going on, the radio, the television, something. 
"I have to wake up early anyway," he said before rolling over.  They had sex, I thought in our bedtime silence, and they moaned loudly, but I didn’t say it or else he’d want to have sex. Lately I’ve been too ass-slapped by the sun to think about slapping anyone else’s ass. 

Yesterday we went to a park and walked around near fresh springs when The Suitor asked me, "Do you know what we are?"
"We’re outdoorsy."  That’s when we, both in our flip-flops, decided we’d need to keep an extra set of sneakers, shorts, and bathing suits in the backs of each of our cars.  Sunblock for certain (even my scalp is burnt).  Then we proceeded to walk some more.  There was some crazy talk about purchasing a plant for our terrace.  "It’s a wonder Linus has survived," I reminded him of my ability to murder everything living which surrounds me.  "How about a bamboo area rug?"  I suggested instead.  So along with the bamboo rug and salad bowl, we toted home some Whole Foods loverliness for the grillin’.  We’re officially suburban now, excluding the 1.5 children.  Gynecologist appointment tomorrow, as I still have no period.  You’re welcome for sharing.  Speaking of sharing.  Holy shit.  I discovered something phenomenal: whipped honey.  I am not getting paid to say this.  I promise you’ll love this stuff. LOVE. I ate probably too much with my finger, straight from the jar, then drizzled mine (lemon flavored) over Florida stone crabs and steamed broccoli. You can melt it on green beans, asparagus, anything a kid is afraid of, including the doctor. Um, well.  Anyway.



  1. Get thee some SPF 45 sun block! Run – don't walk.

    Whipped honey is one of the foods of the gods – I love it on toast just out of the toaster – or on an English muffin. Yum. Good thing it's almost time to go home – I need toast with honey.

    Glad things are going well (except the evil moving truck). I'm loving hearing about Texas ala Miss Stephanie style.

  2. Oh – you must try Ginger Honey – simply amazing! So deeelish – and I am not a honey person.

    I'm totally a city girl – not a mountain girl – but i always secretly admire those mountain girls – the ones who camp and hike and know how to put up a tent. The ones who own more fleece than cashmere. They have 'gear'. I have gucci. I think it's so great that you're becoming – or regaining – your outdoorsy-ness. I need my beachy-ness back. Good for you! Looking forward to hearing more :)

  3. Not forsaking those decidedly urban pleasures, one can begin to appreciate those that come with a suburban life, which you seem to be discovering—and now, having been your faithful reader for well over a year and watching your life switch from sad days spent in bed watching Anne of Green Gables to these on a Aero Bed is, for me at least, a happy observation, and a state I think that you deserve. Even whipped honey is not so sweet as that.

  4. I've been sitting on the edge of my seat, checking every day to hear more about your new habitat. Sounds fantastic so far. I hope you're discovering some good, hearty music scenery when you're not baking under the sun. I hear great things about the night life in Austin.

  5. Whipped honey sounds delicious, especially the cinnamon. I am still trying to figure out if the lavendar honey mentioned in "The Secret Life of Bees" exists…

  6. I might drizzle some of that stuff on my job…will it make it more bearable? Or how about my bills! YES! Those are scary.

  7. I'm a redhead (hence the name) and swear by Water Babies SPF 45. It's even fine to slather on your face, believe it or not, and I'm a bit of a product queen about such things. I came home from a week in Mexico looking like I was never out in the sun at all. Which is only something that a redhead could be grateful for.

  8. Hey,

    While ya'll (native speak) were out going to whole foods, you should have stopped off and bought a little blanket….those mover ones are gross…

    Love the whipped honey though. It is Phenominal!

    Here's to Thursday!!!


  9. Ditto on the SPF 45! I'm jealous of the heat, though.

    And now I have to try this whipped honey.

  10. I don't think anything, not even whipped honey, could make steamed brocolli taste good.
    On another note, I slept on the floor the first six months after I moved away from home. An aerobed would've been a luxury back then.

  11. Flip flops? I uuh err sorta just wrote about them. Thanks for the honey tip. Glad you're enjoying your new surroundings. Imagine how much more you'll enjoy it with furniture.

  12. "and an old mover blanket they use to wrap furniture"

    Ew. Sorry, but just thinkin' about sleeping under that kinda grosses me out.

    And ditto on the SPF. I just buy lotion that comes with SPF.

  13. Thank YOU for sharing! Dinner recipe decided for tonight. Got a couple of seventeeners as of yesterday. If they don't like this drizzled honey, honey … more for me and my dog. Lotsa luck today. You're not planning to kill el gyno, huh?

  14. You went to Zilker Park and Barton Springs didn't you? I love Barton Springs when it's 100 degrees outside b/c the spring is the same cold temp year round. You'll have to go when it opens.

    Off to check out the link to whipped honey. Gawd I love honey. Yum!

  15. Raw honey is great too. Whole Foods should carry it. There's a brand that is totally unfiltered — has bits of the comb and pollen in it. Very back to nature and wholesome feeling

  16. raw honey is something to stay away from IF pregnant…

    And yes, lavendar honey does exist. I ate my weight of it in France!

  17. So jealous! Your new life sounds amazing–so summery! I think you should read tons of books, makes lists and stock up. I am so envious. Manhattan corporate life is a huge frown compared to what you are doing.

  18. where are the photos you promised of you, the suitor, linus, the house, the trees, the flowers, the sun, the breez….everything….
    … pleaaaseeee!!!!!!

  19. I'm confused. You move somewhere somewhat suburban and lament being suburban. You mock women with children yet want a child. Usually I enjoy your writing but lately…?

  20. so youre like 6 days??? doood.

    you might wanna go get that checked out!!!

    have you ever had boiled peanuts? might just be a florida thing. but I'm pretty sure it's not a New york thing…so check em out if you happen upon any (and it's pronounced) *balled* peanuts.

    good stuff. probably not so great with whipped honey though.

  21. whipped honey?! are you out of your fucking mind? you're supposed to be on a DIET. i literally can't think of anything worse to eat if you're trying to lose weight.

  22. I dunno. I can think of plenty of worse things to eat. Lard, for one, wouldn't be the best possibly dietary choice. French fries. The new Blackberry Green Tea Frappuccino I'm looking at right now with a pile of whipped cream, also probably not the best choice. 100% natural honey with no dairy, fat, cholesterol… I think "are you kidding me" needs to go eat more retard snacks… bless his heart.

  23. In fact honey is metabolized faster by the human digestive system then any other form of sugar. So kidding me is wrong in suggesting its a terrible thing to eat on a diet.

    Raw honey also has healing and medicinal properties and is totally natural.

    If you enjoy honey check this beekeeper out in Mn for some truly interesting honey.

  24. Actually, simple sugars (which honey is entirely composed of) are not a particularly great thing to eat while trying to lose weight. Lard and whipped cream, while obviously unhealthy in the long run, at least wouldn't jack up your blood sugar.

    "Although honey is a natural sweetener, it is considered a refined sugar because 96% of dry matter are simple sugars: fructose, glucose and sucrose. It is little wonder that the honey bear is the only animal found in nature with a problem with tooth-decay (honey decays teeth faster than table sugar). Honey has the highest calorie content of all sugars with 65 calories/tablespoon, compared to the 48 calories/tablespoon found in table sugar. The increased calories are bound to cause increased blood serum fatty acids, as well as weight gain, on top of the risk of more cavities."

  25. Aah…in the days 'fore electricity Edison got his groove on by candlelight, Marconi did the mambo, and Graham Bell was coveting Watson's stylish top hat. And yes…they all slept on Aerobeds and covered themselves with moving blankets.

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