intimate details


“Did you have fun at your party the other night?”

I could be polite and make everyone comfortable with the expected, ‘yes’ then forget about it. But I won’t. "Yes and no." Yes to the birthday wish and surrounding friends. Yes to the dancing and cab rides home with my closest friends who stayed with me through the night. No to the mingling and not getting enough of the QT.

You become the Mayor at your own party. There’s shuffling and smiling until your cheeks hurt; you’re busy with introductions and quips. But it all happens fast, and you worry you didn’t spend enough time with this one or that. And you can’t believe how many people showed up, people you haven’t seen, and didn’t expect to come. High school, college, work, Hamptons, Internet, summer, fall, winter, bronze, silver, and gold friends. And you’re elated, so you want to show it. But you’re all over the place, so you can’t. It’s speed dating without phone numbers.

I’m confident everyone knew how happy I was they made it out, despite my mere minutes with each of them. It’s expected. What’s not expected is feeling anxious when you’re trying to sleep that night, wondering why certain people who said they’d turn up didn’t. It’s never personal; sometimes it’s the rain, feeling fat, overbooking, or having out of town guests. Whatever the reason, you end up feeling a little sad. Reeling through the rsvp list wondering.

I know my brilliant friends did everything in their power to make me happy, from the drinks and the planning, to the fondling of my camera, and for that, I’m very appreciative. It’s not my fault I’m only a good multi-tasker when it comes to crafts and careers. When it comes to people and conversations, I prefer intimate. I mean when you think about it, aren’t your best nights ones where you really connect with people? Mine are. But I suppose there’s a time and place for intimate. On subject, despite the porn makeout room at Pop Burger, and the free birthday table until 4am at Hiro, there wasn’t even any licking… unless you count my going home to Linus.

Yes, yes, now you can.



  1. The price of popularity; all your conversations at such parties end up being reduced to "Hi, good to see you, yes it's great isn't it…" repeated endlessly, with the occasional glance meaning "Sorry, must just have a quick word with X but I'll speak to you later" thrown in.

    As for the ones who said they'd turn up but didn't, they probably didn't want to add to that conversational pressure cooker (either that or they're plotting behind your back – I'd stick with the former excuse if you want to get a decent night's sleep!).

    Glad to hear you had a good night, such details excepted. Again, shame I'm on the wrong continent/lacking the private jet to have been there. Mind you, next year will have to be a special one for the big three-O and in partying, as in all other aspects of life, practice makes perfect so that one might be worth a detour…!

  2. Happy belated birthday wishes.

    Looks like a good night from the photo's. Have to say you looked stunning. Particularly liked you in the hat – very tidy!

  3. What I really what to know is being 29 as bad as it seems? Mine's due up in a little under 6 months and I'm getting a bit edgy about it!

  4. You think 29 is tough, try 35. Ick. Looking at that in a month. :)

    I am always curious about some of the people we see often in your photos. The one dark haired pretty girl, the one blonde girl you went to Italy with. Who are they? Best friends? Chums? Stalkers who you just can't get rid of? I know, they may not want their details bandied about to strangers, but if it ever happens that you feel like telling a story about who these frequent repeaters are, I for one would love to hear it. (I know the suggestions page was days ago. I'm doing it anyway.)

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.