June 21, 2004

2 Comments

father’s day

It’s father’s day, and I’m the one who walks away with a gift.  I’ve been working on his present for a while (but it’s still not ready yet).  Dad slips me a $100 bill as I leave for the Pedro…
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June 21, 2004

24 Comments

daddy dearest

Things I learned from my father: 1. To pretend I have a small hole in the seat of my pants, to lure an innocent in closer, to then “brootz” in their face. 2. To call a fart a “brootz.” 3.…
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June 18, 2004

2 Comments

zoom

I’m not religious. I don’t keep Sabbath or go to synagogue. I might go for Yom Kippur and Roshashana, but that’s about it. And that’s mostly for the bingeing on blintz and candied meat stew. I like Christmas trees, and…
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June 18, 2004

3 Comments

manhattan beach

Thankfully Victoria’s Secret is padding. I was wearing ALL WHITE as the sky split open and cried to Dido songs at last night’s Bryant Park concert. Fans swayed, twirling umbrellas, huddling like team players, not strangers. Despite the rain, a…
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June 18, 2004

4 Comments

atheists

I don’t like talking to atheists before I go to bed. Atheists are dangerous because they take a stand not to believe. Agnostics coast. They abstain and tip 13%. Believers and non-belivers take a stance. They fold their arms, dig…
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June 17, 2004

6 Comments

milquetoast

“I’m going to the Dido / John Mayer concert in Bryant Park.” I say as I balance my dirty gin martini. “Oh. Yawn. John Mayer is milquetoast.” “Milquetoast?” I am certain when I say this I’ve lifted an eyebrow. “Yeah,…
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June 16, 2004

1 Comment

get listed

Barney’s department store says Give Good Gift. I’ve been told I give good… list. Ahem, what were you thinking? I’ve added the new category to this site, so you can access all my lists with the touch of a drop-down…
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June 14, 2004

4 Comments

sports and tits

Last night I licked my fingers a lot. Paul Katcher rescued me. He grabbed me over IM and forced me out of my apartment. Paul and I met at a blogger nerd herd fest in January. He once told me…
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