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watercolor marriage support

February 17, 2015

42 Comments

When I showed Phil my latest watercolor painting, finally complete, his response came first from his raised eyebrows, and then from his sour mouth. “Well, I wouldn’t spend your days doing it is all I’m saying.” The subtext for those…
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soul sisters

February 10, 2015

1 Comment

Maybe it was a thing of the 80s, or maybe it’s just a teen thing, or a camp thing, a boy girl, summer love thing, but for me, early love—not to be trivialized—can actually be heard on a mixtape. Like…
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winter vagina

January 26, 2015

10 Comments

“Winter Blues.” That’s what people call it, when you don’t want to leave your house, and it just so happens to be winter. You hibernate and wear the same clothes on Sunday that you did on Friday, and you do…
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his heart

November 30, 2014

6 Comments

On Black Friday, I sent this email to Phil’s closest people. It’s an update from the chair of the recovery room, where I sat beside Phil as he snored. Phil is out, in recovery now. There were no blood clots…
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waiting game

November 18, 2014

13 Comments

I just wrote a very long, beautiful post, and poof. It wasn’t meant to be. So here’s what I’ve got left, which was not included in the original post. I just ordered myself a winter coat online and saved over…
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surgery scheduled: health update

November 10, 2014

20 Comments

He found a lump. Back before he had heart surgery, I used to joke about Phil’s manssiere, or “bro,” his man bra that was his external defibrillator. The thing used to go off—asking bystanders to step away from the device—during…
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everything we love is on loan

June 18, 2014

42 Comments

Carol saved takeout containers, always sending people home with leftovers, yet somehow managing to amass a small architectural village behind her cupboard doors. A “mini-hoarder” my father used to tease. “What, Don? Ya never know.” When my father sat Shiva…
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put a ring on it – health updates

April 28, 2014

9 Comments

Phil got some alarming health news this week. Phil’s father died in his 30’s of a Cardiomyopathy (“Heart Muscle Disease” having nothing to do with a poor diet).  Phil has a Cardiomyopathy. Phil is 47. Phil is now in complete…
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