Stephanie Klein's Greek Tragedy

you got to co-or-din-ate!

This PR material (above) landed in my inbox this morning, and I couldn't help but think of John Witherspoon's bit in the movie Boomerang. Is it just me, or would this outfit make his mushroom swell? David Alan Grier…

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private benjamin moments

At Island Burgers & Shakes: "Yes, I'd like a side of cottage cheese with some celery please. Oh, and then kill me." It was a rock bottom moment. A lot of people speak about bottoming out, getting to that…

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were you born ready?

Cheesy confession: I opted IN to receive inspirational daily quotations. It was from a low dysfunctional dieting moment, no doubt, where I was ready to do whatever it took... even if it took me to the intersection of Velveeta and…

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family tree project

In third grade, we were charged with decorating the hallway outside our classroom with a mural of the solar system. Girls all but yanked each others' braided pigtails for a chance to place Saturn. For whatever reason Saturn just seemed…

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balance is bullshit

Jen Lancaster, Stephanie Klein; photo by Luc Van Braekel What amazes me most is that we used to do it. In high school, we managed to balance AP English with AP Economics, with calculus, with AP art and AP…

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oscartini’s and cry babies

I have plenty to post, but you're gonna have to wait for it. I need to collect myself, defrizz, hydrate, and sit with the thoughts. I need sleep. We all screamed and wept like little girls when Sandy…

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high low holidays

Shopping drunk in a Marshalls was my high point. I’ll admit it; my step wasn't the sturdiest, and when I faltered—wiggling out of my winter coat, dumping it into my cart—I thought, Total 'let's watch the hidden camera footage' moment.…

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oops is the best part: what’s your holitude?

It’s that time of year when I want to change my ringtone from Default to Deck The Halls, or, more accurately, to my favorite holiday song of all-time (sorry Santa Baby): Silver Bells.  It’s the season of holiday party invites,…

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are you happy?

I have a word document on my desktop titled, "Thanksgiving."  It doesn't list all the things for which I'm thankful, though maybe it should.  Maybe Thanksgiving is the time of year for resolutions.  When we give thanks, even listing…

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truest stages of rejection

It's the worst when you allow yourself to get excited. You begin to plan a future wrapped around this one hope. It's really happening! And then, someone takes a furry turd and smears it on your corduroys. And dammit,…

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