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two week followup with the vag

May 25, 2012


Heading now to the reproductive endocrinologist with my mother in tow. Or rather, she’s got me by the hair and is dragging me there now. Will report the findings after my 11am appointment. I wonder if this premature menopause is caused by a gluten intolerance. One of my best friends in Austin considers the gluten-free […]

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after consulting with a reproductive endocrinologist…

May 9, 2012



I’ve been talking to the universe (again). Alone in my car I’ll say, “So, universe, listen up.” Then I’ll continue, aloud, for a decent stretch, the way one would shoot the shit with a sister. Though I try to get to the damn point already, in case the universe has ADD. Since I share this […]

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head between your knees health

May 2, 2012


I was in a parking lot this morning, head between my legs. I don’t actually think this is supposed to help with fainting, but I think I saw it on the Brady Bunch, or watched my mother do it at some point. I had to pull the car over. I was on the phone with […]

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a friend visits, craving yogurt

February 6, 2012


a friend visits, craving yogurt

I have a friend visiting, and she’s awesome, all apple-cheeked and cheery. I just sang a hymn. And guess where I’m taking her today? We’re collecting the beans after school and dashing off to Yogurt-land—today is National Frozen Yogurt Day (since there’s a day for everything from bull testicles to the color blue-green)—for free fro-yo […]

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medical update

January 24, 2012


I went to the gynecologist yesterday for an annual exam. I’m 36 years old. I know my period has been fucked up for over a year now, coming infrequently. I assumed it was because of the weight loss and stress of moving. The nurse asked me what I used for birth control, and I answered […]

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rich dreams of bad things

September 17, 2010


Pregnant at least 13 weeks. The doctor tells me she doesn’t think… “Well, I suspect your sac is light.” I ask that my husband come in to see. We just want to see all these moments, every chance we can. “No,” she says, not a good idea. But I feel it. There’s something here. I […]

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advice: taking candice from a baby

June 3, 2010


she stole my baby name! My friend stole the name I wanted for my child

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sleeping with the little engine that could…n’t

December 28, 2009


I realize, of course, the implication of my title. So, I’ll set things right at the onset. This is not my attempt at creating a euphemism for erectile dysfunction, nor is it a comment on the vest-pocket penis. For starters, I can most certainly trump "little engine" in the euphemism department: "Gabe was a roll […]

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