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10 years ago today, before marriage or twins, 10 years ago to this exact day, January 20, I made the decision to start a blog, naming it Greek Tragedy on a whim, because really, no one thought of titles or blogs then, and to begin one, you must fill in a form, where you’re asked for a title. I’m partly Greek, and there was my complete rejection from all of Greek life in college, where I was singled out as the one and only woman no one wanted in their sorority. So, why not? I’d start a blog where I could write about all of it.
In 10 years of writing a blog, I’d say there’s probably 3 years worth of stories, and the rest is trying to find the motivation or inspiration to tell them. There were periods where I refused to write about my marriage, without saying as much, because it only gives people more to throw shit at. In 10 years, though, I’ve finally learned how to deal with the trolls–not, as convention would dictate, by “not feeding them,” but by feeding them foil-wrapped kisses, or simply by pressing “delete.”
Sometimes though the trolls show up in my fingers in the form of self-doubt, hoping to beat the anonymous words of cowards to the punch, and in doing so, my writing isn’t as authentic. It’s defensive. I hope the next decade brings more words of authenticity, cyclical in nature, back to my raw true state. And I wonder if I can find my way to write about the less dramatic moments, about the people, places, and things which bring me the most joy. The books and preening and recipes and art projects and photography make up a lot of the “non-story” material on this Greek Tragedy blog, as do the fun lists and writing exercises, which I plan to do much, much more of in the years to come. I’ve given Straight Up Advice, shared He Said, She Said videos, revealed a healthy dose of food love, and disclosed some gift guide direction, all whilst requesting restaurant and hair salon recommendations. And mostly, I’ve gone back… remembering moments, wondering if I could’ve held them for longer, using my writing as a medium to stretch time and live longer in the ifs, without forcing myself to accept the past as just a story that needs to be retold in a way that will make me feel better about my present.
The stories that mark these 10 years range from dating and mating to breakups and breakthroughs, from marriage to miscarriage, to premature labor and NICU nights to emergency illnesses: heart surgeries, brain surgeries, and premature menopause. And across these pages, I write about friendships and endships, a plan to handle ’em both, the new ones that must accommodate the new labels we wear: new friends now that you’re in the suburbs, in Texas, in Florida, in New York, in marriage, in pregnancy, single again, married again, new mom friends, the friends who knew you when–your memory friends, your give-get friends. I can’t say which part of my blog I enjoy writing most, but perhaps more than any of it, I appreciate and really savor the times when you write to me. I find that your comments and feedback guide me because I want to tap into what others might be experiencing, so we’re not all living it as separately as it feels that we are. Thank you for sticking with me for all this time, for sharing posts on Facebook, for directing friends here. For expanding the heart of this blog and becoming a family, thank you.
Happy Anniversary, Greek Tragedy. I’m so proud of you, all of you, just as you are.