being her

In ALL, DATING & MATING, MARRIAGEby Stephanie Klein25 Comments

other stephanie klein woman

It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes I think I should be everything I fear. I should step out from everything I am and try on what other feels like. Be that type of woman. The type I’m not.

I’ve heard advice given from weight loss to love about pretending. Pretend you’re already thin. When you think you’re already there, you’ll begin to eat like a thin person. Behave like you’re deeply in lust with your man, can’t get through a day without sneaking to the bathroom to get off. "Be the change." So it would follow that if there’s something that intimidates you, someone you can’t imagine being, you should at the very least play at it. Be the other woman.

Sometimes, I think Phil could finish this sentence, "No, way. Stephanie is NOT the type of woman to ever…" He doesn’t put those limitations on me. I do, not often, but I do. We like to think of ourselves in a certain way. I want to be one of those people who can cook a month’s worth of meals on a weekend, proportioned, frozen, reheat instructions on the freezer label beside the date. One of those people who have a suitcase packed, ready for anywhere, toiletries included. A Real Simple of a life, with a wrapping paper armoire. But that’s never the other woman. That’s safe; that’s planning. It’s not passion.

I’m challenging myself, for the month of February, the month of amore, to be the other woman. The wig’s going to be optional this year (If you haven’t tried this before, you should! I would do it again, but now that Phil knows I’ve done that for another guy, kinda takes the fun out of it, so I’ve got to get creative!)


      1. For a while, I thought I was the only one who noticed the white elephant in the room…thanks Annabelle for reaffirming the nipple exposure. This could be an ad for a summer dress catalogue, or a swingers convention…

        1. Well Stephanie obviously knows this, since she’s read these comments and has replied to others. Maybe this is the woman she’s trying to Be! :)

        2. I disagree! That’d have to be a pretty big nip to extend that far into her cleavage! I think it’s just a weird shadow.

  1. Your aspirational life is based on a magazine that is essentially a catalogue? That is you to a tee.

  2. My girlfriend needs to read this. Guess sending her this post would make me kind of a douche, huh?

  3. What if your husband doesn’t want the other woman? I guess this is an exercise for you about you more than anything, but it seems weird to me. Maybe it’s just the phrasing and maybe you’re taking about the typical, trying to be a better person stuff. I think I’m confused.

    1. Author

      I think it’s both. I want to be what I admire, what I wonder if I’d have the guts to do. Be the change. Be the fear. It’s also fun and exciting to mix things up, even if he doesn’t want “the other woman.” It’s the idea of it, the fun spirit in which it’s meant. It shows that you want to be playful, light, that you’re open. That it’s for you, both of you.

      1. I totally agree with SK…My husband got me a Santa Outfit
        for Christmas from Victoria Secret – the Hat and the Skirt with
        the Garter Belt and socks to go with it. When I tried it, I was
        scared and it felt weird for like a second or too…but I got
        so into it..It was a turn on for me to try to seduce him with
        something I almost never do. Needless to say the sex was great
        and I would do it again in an instant.
        I’m considering this outfit for valentine’s day:

  4. How do you really go about doing this? “Being the change” when you’re single and already dreading V-day?

  5. When it comes to the boudoir… I completely agree. There’s nothing a man likes more than a little bit of change and ‘being someone else’ in the sack. Unfortunately, a full day with two little kids leaves me too drained to shift gears and summon the alternate personality.

    All other desires of change are really just fleeting for me. I go to other people’s houses and admire their decor, or how everything is in it’s place. I admire the absence of dustbunnies and the abundance of perfectly coordinated everything. I wish for a Viking stove or for a bigger more ‘adult friendly’ living room. The thoughts linger for a day… maybe.

    Then one son looks at me and says something sweet while the other one (the infant) smiles and drools. Despite the chaos that is my life, the mess, the ‘to-do’ list that goes on and on, I’ve got two, great sons. My oldest (nearly 4) is well behaved and sweet as pie. My best time is spent changing their lives and I wouldn’t have it any other way. So, for now…the decorating of my entryway and dining room (which were painted some six months ago) can wait.

  6. LMAO, that was the first thing I saw, too! I think all the silicon/saline prevents her from feeling the breeze to realize she had a nip-slip.

  7. Oh the irony of you embracing being the other woman when your dick of a wasband betrayed you. I seriously love this blog, but you shock me sometimes, not always in a good way, but this time, I think you’re onto something.

  8. there is no nipple there. it’s probably a shadow. at the most, a teensy bit of areola, but even that’s a stretch.

  9. You guys are cracking me up! Ok, here’s what I see: No nip, no weird shadow and her dress is pale blue, not white!

    1. I completely agree! I even was like HUH, are my eyes broken?! Glad I’m not the only one who disagrees!

  10. I guess comments are off in the next entry about this. I am intrigued by this idea, but I’m keeping it as an ace in the hole for later….While “window” shopping on tonight I random came across these and it made me think of becoming the other woman without a total transformation:

    I originally saw the peacock design and was intrigued, but this one is more rock-a-billy and fun.

  11. Ms., you are correct, pale blue, (or snow white) white bra, push up, cotton, probably half cut.

    The shadow you see is, nipple.

  12. yup! I see no nipple and that dang dress is blue! That would be one hell of a nipple if it stretched out that far- well maybe if she’s had kids cause mine got ….. lmao

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