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autumntinis and nightingale droppings

Sun, Sep 21, 2008

food porn

martini

The other night while out at The Range with the girls–only in Texas is a rooftop bar called "The Range"–a few rounds of "Pineapple Upside Down" shots found their way to our table. This makes for an excellent girl shot, but one cannot consume such full-sized sweet drinks without an insulin shot nearby. With summer now officially over, it’s time to get the autumn drink on. I know ordinarily this consists of mulled things, or even maple syrup red apple martinis, but I’m on the watch for something new and am most willing to be a Guinea Piggy. I have to admit that one of the benefits of the ‘burbs is getting porch drunk and ordering curbside pick-up from the Cheesecake Factory (though, not in that order). Tonight while ordering, I noticed that they totally rocked the summer addition drink list with their Asian Pear Martini, but it does beg the question, who drinks at the Cheesecake Factory? Seriously.

PINEAPPLE UPSIDE DOWN SHOTS
Absolute Vanilla Vodka, Hazelnut Liqueur, Pineapple Juice, splash of Grenadine (sinks to bottom and looks like a cherry nipple)

ASIAN PEAR MARTINI
Absolute Vanilla Vodka, pear, sake and passion fruit

Now, aside from a few adult beverages to enjoy the Emmy Awards, all I really need is nightingale droppings for a facial and an Ambrosia Judith Ripka bracelet for my world to be complete. Or would applying Visine to an aggravated pimple get the red out? I pushed way too hard and am suffering the popping consequences. It looks as if there’s a bit of raw food on my cheek.

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36 Responses to “autumntinis and nightingale droppings”

  1. Lola Says:

    This has nothing to do with this post, and I know it's silly but..

    Today, while walking in the bookstore, I saw two children's books side by side.. One said, "A is for Abigail" and the other said "Everyone Poops." My first thought? Stephanie Klein! Too funny (at least for me) ;)

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  2. Sallie Says:

    "I have to admit that the Cheesecake Factory rocked the summer addition drink list with their Asian Pear Martini, but it does beg the question, who drinks at the Cheesecake Factory? Seriously."

    You, apparently, to know about that drink. I've had a drink there, too, while splitting desserts with friends. Am I missing something? Is that "just not done" among the fashionable or something?

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  3. Chelsea Talks Smack Says:

    I love drinking in accordance to season! I'll have t try the Cheesecake Factory martini…..I suppose it'd be a nice place to drink, good lighting, you'll definitely have a "table"….. and there's FOOD. lol.

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  4. T Says:

    Are you kidding? You HAVE to drink at the Cheesecake Factory or you'll want to blow your brains out between the screaming kids and 90 minute wait. ;-) Better question- Who DOESN'T drink at The Cheesecake Factory??

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  5. Jessie Says:

    Especially since they put little to no booze in those expensive cocktails.

    I recommend befriending the bartenders.

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  6. Bill Says:

    CF is not for drinking. It's for eating oversized portions, for having the cheesecake first so that you have room for it and you can decide on the regular food later, and for having someone roll you to your car afterwards because you're too full to move.

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  7. binaross Says:

    I always drink at the Cheesecake Factory. It's a habit I formed while living in the Valley of LA, where there is so little to do that even Dr. Dre hangs out at TGIFridays.

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  8. mommy2 Says:

    Speaking of yummy things, I had Lady M's mille crepe cake today. Delish! Thanks for introducing me via email to Derek. He was very helpful in both dispelling rumors and helping me feel better about this unfamiliar environment. On a side note, do you know any good grocery stores on the upper East side? I went to Butterfield today, but there isn't much selection.

    FROM SK: Grace's was my grocery store of choice, considering my location at the time. Truthfully, it's all quite expensive, but for something special head to Eli's. Sundays are fun at Vinegar Factory. Derek is the man.

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  9. AJMick Says:

    Ugh. Cheesecake Factory. I just don't get it.

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  10. jean Says:

    the bracelet is way too much – you are so much more interesting than that.

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  11. Colleen Says:

    That bracelet is INCREDIBLE!!!! (so is the price)
    However, using bird poop to wash my face is just… I don't know… just. can't. do. it.
    Perhaps I'm not refined enough. Calling it 'nightingale droppings' still means birdshit to me.
    I think I'd rather just buy the bracelet and exfoliate my face with that. Stones are as natural as bird droppings, no?

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  12. kim Says:

    That nightingale stuff sure is intriguing, I really wonder if it's truely used or just a hoax. I'm heading for Kyoto in a month, will see if I can find out there.

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  13. Carol from SA Says:

    That bracelet is gross. And WAY too old for you.
    Yuck

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  14. nh Says:

    Cheesecake Factory? No self-respecting foodie I know would eat there willingly or more than once. Also, I agree with Carol from SA about the bracelet. It is icky, just like the food at Cheesecake Factory. As for 'the range", I am envisioning some bar with a tidy shopping mall parking lot.

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  15. Julie Says:

    Er, I drink at Cheesecake Factory. Sour apple martinis, they're pricey but delicious. You sound almost snotty in this! I hope you meant that question because of their desserts and not because you think it's classless. Drinks aside, speaking of CF- they need to bring back the open face hot turkey sandwich with mashed potatoes. Mmmmmmm…

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  16. Julie Says:

    Oh and to bring down the redness (and close the pores you were picking at) hold a cold rag (icey if you can stand it) over where you've pinched too hard. It's what I do when I've picked and pinched too much.

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  17. Mr. R Says:

    My wallet was stolen once. The only charge on my credit card? Two rounds of cocktails at the Cheesecake Factory.

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  18. Sara Says:

    A better pear martini to try:

    Grey Goose Poire
    Amaretto
    Simple Syrup
    Lemon Juice

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  19. annie Says:

    seriously. the Cheesecake factory is gross.

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  20. SWFlower Says:

    nh: seriously, you need to move on because obviously this blogger annoys you. Why always rain on her parade? If you don’t like her or her choices or whatever, read elsewhere.

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  21. beth Says:

    I don't know how anybody drinks anywhere in the burbs. Having lived in NYC for nearly all of my post-21 life, I'm completely spoiled by the abundance of cheap taxis. I'm always too worried about about the drive home to indulge when I'm visiting the suburbs (or even Boston or LA, for that matter). I'm definitely not what you'd call a "heavy drinker", but I'm paranoid enough not to risk driving after any more than one cocktail. Porch drunk seems the only way to go, honestly.

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  22. A Says:

    If you want interesting and crazy delicious seasonal drinks, go to FINO and ask Bill Norris to make you something. He is an artist with the booze. Seriously. Yum.

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  23. thecoconutdiaries Says:

    I concur with T. You must saddle up to the bar for a few frozen glass cocktails to forget that you just waited 45 minutes and are about to pack on 2,500 calories for the deliciousness that is the Spicy Cashew Chicken and Oreo Cheesecake.

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  24. Barbara Says:

    At $28,800 that bracelet is definitely not "a little thing of beauty". But Ripka's mother evidently taught her well.

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  25. KarelK2 Says:

    Asian Pear Martinis sound wonderful…I'll have to try the recipe! (I can skip the cheesecake as I'm partial to Carnegie Deli's with that fabulous cookie dough crust, don't you agree?)
    We're headed to Austin in about a month and would appreciate some hotel and live music venue suggestions. We love the blues, country & rock. We plan on taking the Friday morning ACL studio tour at UT – is that worth it?
    From everything we hear about Austin, three nights is too short but you take what you can get…

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  26. leigha Says:

    on the subject of odd facials I would like to share that I was pooped on by a bee while laying out at the pool yesterday. Didn't know if I should be grossed out or start smearing it around.

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  27. ashley Says:

    I LOVE LOVE peartinis!! try The Daily Grill @ The Domain….they mastered them!
    as for carol form SA: im just baffled at the mean, ignorant comments from readers. its like if youre so turned off by her posts and what not STOP READING! everyone has their own taste and fashion sense….but NEVER in a million years would I tell my best friend let alone a stranger that her piece of jewelry was gross! so rude!

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  28. kate Says:

    mmm…cheesecake factory…shrimp blt sandwich. good stuff.

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  29. LC Says:

    Dang. That Pineapple Upside Down Shot. (writing it down)

    The absolute best thing I've ever tried for zits – tea tree oil. Smells awful, but I've been using it for years and NOTHING else compares. If your skin isn't super sensitive, just dab a little bit on the zit before bedtime. You'll be amazed.

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  30. LC Says:

    I actually like the bracelet, which is unusual since I don't really like jewelry, particularly gold jewelry. "Oh, I wonder how much it is?" And then I crapped in my office chair. :) It IS beautiful, though.

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  31. laur Says:

    i think the bracelet comment was tongue in cheek – the fact that it was paired with a ridiculous beauty product made from bird droppings – seriously, who would pay for either of those? you guys don't need to defend SK's choice of jewelry b/c this was clearly a joke!
    i don't understand the people getting all worked up defending the cheesecake factory. that place is quantity, not quality. it's expensive, over-hyped, and just not good. i personally take my calories and my cash elsewhere.

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  32. Sara Klein-Kapell Says:

    Stephanie – I know I havent been in touch in forever. Bar Bar Bar was the story of my life for a good three months.

    Anyway….go to nordstroms and get Mario Badescu drying lotion. It hurts like a b**ch but works.

    Love and Shana Tova.

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  33. Eleni Says:

    Foodies can like the Cheesecake Factory just like fashionistas can adore Target.

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  34. GEG Says:

    Even if the reference to the nightingale poop was a joke, it is quite commonly used here in Japan as face care. I'm fairly sure the "real stuff" is quite expensive though, so perhaps there is a lower poop content in that $15 bottle on eBay.

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  35. Crystal Says:

    i recently had this yummy drink at a $2 happy hour in san francisco- i highly recommend:
    The Jade Cocktail
    Vanilla Vodka, Melon Liqueur and fresh lemon, lime and pineapple juices .

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  36. Jasika Says:

    As a bartender, the Pineapple Upside Down Cake is definitely on my repertoire. When ridiculous people ask me to make them "anything" (don't ever do that if you're over the age of 17, btw). I think about giving them whiskey but always give them Pinapple Upside Down Cake. Its delicious and EVERYONE, I mean EVERYONE loves it.

    Cheers*

    And I'd drink at McDonalds if I really needed a drink.

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