fear of contradicting yourself

I’ve been doing so many interviews lately my head begins to spin.  What if I answered that question differently the last time? Will my answers come across as self-help rather than memoir?  Are interviewers trying to pidgeonhole MOOSE as a "how not to be a fat teen" book?  I know it is all in my head, but that’s what makes me me, so deal with it.  The prize for stupidest question came from someone the other day.  The line of questioning went as follows-

Interviewer-  How much did you weigh at 13 years old?

Me– I was 165lbs and 5’2" 

Interviewer– How did you get that big?

Me- I ate three bowls of cereal instead of one

Interviewer– Stephanie, how could your parents afford all that food?  It must have been incredibly expensive.

Compare and contrast:

NPR Radio Interview(Audio)- Worth a listen!!

Torrid Stores

Woman’s Day

Dallas Morning News

DivineCaroline

The Forward

Austin American Statesman

Newsweek

Woman’s Day NEW EXCERPT

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COMMENTS:

  1. this is my favorite quote. one i'm cutting and pasting to my own private blog, to remember:

    I hate the idea, and you see it on talk shows all the time, that you must be miserable because you’re fat. You must be trying to stuff a hole in your life. It’s just not the case. The thinnest I’ve ever been in my life, I was a miserable psycho. Then the times I’ve been most at peace with myself, generally just happy and everything is going along well, [I was heavier]. I don’t want people to get turned off by [my moments self-loathing]. I hope people give it enough of a chance to realize that that’s not the message in the end. It’s about recognizing who you are and who you want to be and to be confident with what you’ve got. You only live once. Because, one day, I promise, you’ll look back on who you are now and you’ll say, “Why didn’t I realize how awesome I was?” That is key. When you’re easier in your own skin and you’re confident, you make a difference in the world. You do positive things and you’re easier to be around. Don’t let other people tell you who you think you are. At the end of the book, I do come to the conclusion that we see ourselves so much more harshly than others see us and that [you often] come across a great, passionate, amazing woman that you know—whether you see her on TV, whether she’s the girl next door—and you say, “God, she’s so amazing!” And she can be plus-size, she can be a fat girl. Whatever! If we can see ourselves as successful, we’ll be successful. '

  2. I'm only a few chapters in to the book, and I can't help but wonder how you have such an incredibly close relationship with your dad now. In the book, in your early years it seems he said and did very hurtful things, things that affected your fundamental being. I'm guessing your mother as well, but it seems you have a best friend-esque r'ship with your dad. How did you later negotiate between the two experinces of having your dad tell you no one likes a fat girl and being best friends? Granted, he's your father and you'll always love your parents because they do the best they can, but it must have been difficult, no? Just wondering.

  3. I'm only a few chapters in to the book, and I can't help but wonder how you have such an incredibly close relationship with your dad now. In the book, in your early years it seems he said and did very hurtful things, things that affected your fundamental being. I'm guessing your mother as well, but it seems you have a best friend-esque r'ship with your dad. How did you later negotiate between the two experinces of having your dad tell you no one likes a fat girl and being best friends? Granted, he's your father and you'll always love your parents because they do the best they can, but it must have been difficult, no? Just wondering.

  4. OH MY GAWD! Yes. Those $1.89 boxes of Frosted Flakes must have bankrupted your parents. That's how my family ended up on skid row.

  5. Incredible. Was he/she serious? I'm taking off work at my bar to come to the Miami reading. Love your writing.

  6. I'm so happy to have come to see you yesterday at Border's. You are a great public speaker and an inspiration to me. Oui! Merci :)

  7. I listened to your interview today with Krys Boyd and I enjoyed it so much that I had to look up your website. Love the Blogs and I can't wait to read the new book. All my best, a new fan.

  8. That NPR interview is well done. I so love NPR. You should do All Things Considered.

  9. MOOSE is amazing! Thank you for writing it. Really makes me feel less alone.

  10. Loved meeting you today! I started reading Moose today, and I got sucked into reading it for hours.

    Hope the Dallas reading went wonderfully.

  11. In each interview I think you come across as thoughtful. It must be tough to think of answers that aren't drawn out or boring.

    Loving MOOSE!

  12. The amount of things you do makes my job as a brain surgeon seem like a vacation.

    Can't wait to meet you in Miami.

  13. It was great to see you again! The reading was great, and the chocolate was fricking fantastic. Blake had fun in the back watching Abigail and Lucas. :) They are such dolls!

  14. "Interviewer- How did you get that big?"

    That cracks me up but good. Like asking of a recently deceased 98-year-old, "What did he/she die of?"

    Um…being 98?

  15. You should have given the interviewer the look you gave Phil in the donut video!

    Looking forward to seeing you in Miami.

  16. One question I'd like to know is how long does it take to write a book like MOOSE and if it was easier or harder than Straight Up And Dirty?

  17. Not to be all down on this party, but it would absolutely have been an issue in my family if I had eaten three bowls of cereal rather than one. And it would have been a *financial* issue. No one was making me watch my weight; no one ever said the words "men won't ever love you if you're fat"; and no one ever, EVER tied my self-worth to my appearance. Or to money, for that matter. 'Cause we didn't have any money, for starters!

    Just my perspective. That kind of consumption–even in the story about cereal, which seems small and trivial to you and others–can be an issue to others who are not as well off.

    Congrats on the process, completion, and release of your second book. It must be a truly, truly amazing feeling.

  18. I'm enjoying MOOSE so much more than STRAIGHT UP & DIRTY. You are dead-on with your descriptions of the late 80s trends and fashions in the NYC suburbs.

  19. Great interviews Stephanie! I went through each.
    I am just diving into Moose. Your writing as always, is engaging! (Hard to put it down. Why-oh-why do children have to be fed so often. It's interfering with my reading)
    ;-)
    Um, by the way, there are still the occasional late night forays into the kitchen where I will down 3 bowls of cereal.(CoCoa pebbles to be exact.)I pay for it the next morning with the stomach ache. And an almost empty box of Cocoa pebbles.

    3T

  20. Stephanie,

    As a mother of overwight daugter(she is almost 14, 5'2" 155lb) i'm trying to find a camp for her. Do you have any suggestions?
    What do you think of Wellspring Camps?
    She actually eats no 3 bowls of cereal, but 1 box a day.

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