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Peashoot_2 Photo taken this morning…more on my Flickr page>>

He’s happy and home now.  Smiling, cooing, cute in a way I’ve never seen.  More active, interactive, and joyful.  I’m happy in those moments, when I’m beside him, witnessing just how okay he is, how normal, what a baby.  But when I’m driving or in a cafe writing I remember the last time he giggled.  He was happier than I’d ever seen him, flirting with the nurses at the doctor’s office, the day before he needed emergency brain surgery.  So I don’t know how much comfort I can take in his happy.  I’m scared of what’s inside, of all they don’t know. 

He’s going back to the hospital this Thursday, where he’ll be sedated for another spinal MRI and lumbar puncture.  By Friday morning we’ll have a better idea of where things are.  Compare films and fluids.  Numbers.  Sizes.  Cells.  Have things stayed the same, settled down, or progressed?  To biopsy this obstruction would be very invasive and not without a significant host of risks. They still aren’t sure what we’re dealing with, or what if anything is done about it. 

These next few days are a reprieve, my chance to get some writing done.  My chance to enjoy my son before I return to full-throttle worry mode.  My chance to return all the extraordinary emails I’ve been receiving.  My chance to gather all the information and send it for second opinions, hoping someone will know exactly what we’re dealing with. 

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COMMENTS:

  1. I am so happy that you and your family can once again enjoy Lucas at home! My prayers are still with your amazing family. Stay strong!

  2. I hope all goes well later in the week. I have been checking on here obsessively.

    Enjoy him- thats what you both need.

  3. Stephanie,

    I just wanted to let you know something. My husband and I have recently decided to start a family. Believe it or not your blogs, especially recent posts concerning lucas have really helped me. Your endless love for you Son, your strength at times of hardship have been encouraging and heartwarming. You are a fantastic mother, and I can not wait for the day I have a family of my own. I have a fantastic husband, and reading of yours & Phils partnership makes me smile. I know that this might seem like such a stupid thing to say to you, but you are blessed. Enjoy a few days downtime with your family. Much love from the UK.

  4. I for one do not want to hear anything from you until the end of the week because I want you to spend every second with the beans and Phil! Go……………breathe easy………laugh with your little ones and enjoy this time together outside of the hospital!

  5. Welcome Home Lucas! Have been and will still be thinking of you and your family–I admire your strength…enjoy the week and your wonderful family.

  6. I am so happy for you guys and continue to send you all a big supportive HUG! You will get to the bottom of this! Don't worry! You've come this far. With your determination and smarts Lucas will be out of the woods soon!

  7. So happy to hear he is back home with his family. Healing thoughts and positive energy coming your family's way.

  8. Stephanie,

    Lucas is going through a lot, but why does it not come as a surprise that someone as strong as you produced a baby as strong as he is?

    As always wishing you and your entire family only good things…. there is strength and numbers and you have a lot of people thinking about you.

    Enjoy these smiles and the time to write, or get sushi.

  9. that's great stephanie! so happy you're able to enjoy the next few days home with lucas. definitely stay strong and enjoy your time together.

  10. i am SO glad you are able to have him at home!! take this time and rest. i know writing is good for you and i am ocd about checking for updates, but enjoy this time. all of us here is your cyber corner understand!! i bet his sister was glad to see him too!! i hope she has been holding up ok. lots of love and prayers from fort worth!

  11. I am so glad you get some family time at home for a few days to rejuvenate for later this week. Makes my heart melt knowing he is smiling, laughing and cooeing for you. ENJOY!!!!!!!!!

  12. I am so happy that he's home. You all must be so happy to have him there. Enjoy your time, the little things that we all probably take for granted from time to time. I hope that they can give you some answers this week and that they will be good ones. Ones that make it all better. Sending love and well wishes from OH…

  13. So happy to hear that Lucas is home and happy. You all deserve this time to enjoy each other. You've been through so much lately. I hope you'll take some time this week to relax and sleep and maybe even take some new pictures. Good luck on Thursday. And, btw, how is Abigail? I hope she's better too, and what she had was just a diaper rash and a run of the mill stomach virus. You had enough on your plate. Sending positive thoughts, as always…

  14. First of all, man, that is one handsome boy you have there… (-; Wow.

    Secondly, since you already mentioned you are googling, check out Skullbaseinstitute.com (Los Angeles) and search for arachnoid cyst on their website.

    Best wishes to Lucas and family.

  15. What a beautiful boy! The picture with Abigail is precious. May they bring you infinite joy, and as few worries as possible. Keeping my fingers crossed for Lucas!

  16. Oh Stephanie, your babies are beautiful. The one of Abigail touching Lucas' head is precious. He looks so healthy and strong. Thanks for sharing.

  17. Wow Stephanie (and Phil)
    I"m still so sorry. You are in my prayers. That cute little booger, he's a fighter! There WILL be a doctor who knows. There WILL be an answer. They WILL fix it. He WILL be fine! Here are happy thoughts, joyful vibes, prayers and air hugs.
    God bless you all.

  18. I hate my job so you're updates do distract me. :) But I have to agree with Lisa and Stepheney on this one; take a break. Enjoy your beautiful son and daughter and Phil. We'll be here when your angel heads back to the doctor's office.

  19. Such sweet pictures. You really capture their personalities. I'm sure they were so happy to be together again. Sending good vibes your way.

  20. Hi, just wanna send you some hugs all the way from Sweden. I'm thinking about you, Phil and your beautiful babies and I hope things will get better as soon as possible.

  21. handsome guy, that Lucas! i love how different he and Abigail are from each other in looks. beautiful pictures as always, Stephanie, of beautiful subect matter–you and Phil really do make some gorgeous bebes!! continuing well wishes and prayers for you guys, i hope you have a productive yet restful week.

  22. HOORAY! this officially made my day – thanks for sharing the pics and the good news about happy Lucas. thoughts and prayers are still surrounding you, miss stephanie tara klein. :)

  23. This pic almost made me cry. As I've said all along, just take it one day at a time. He's such a pretty baby, Stephanie.
    He really is. Looks so much like a little boy.

  24. Look at that sweet angel baby… Seeing pics of your babies just makes me happy. He looks lovely, and healthy, and strong, and alert and pink and perfect. I know it's hard to not wait for the other shoe to drop.. know that we're all still sending you good thoughts and praying for you all.

    And I agree with Stepheney above.. screw us! :) Take some time and nibble on those sweet little cheeks!

  25. It made me smile today when I saw just how much your babies look like you. Also, the tone change in your writing was comforting today. I'm glad you're doing a little better.

  26. The pics make me so happy are releived in a way. Happy for you to have a moment of peace. I really am thinking and praying for ya'll. one of my best friends has twins, barely older than yours – also boy & girl. It just hits close to home for me, although I know I have no idea. I admire and am floored by your strength and grace through all of this. Supermommy.
    Special request, if it's not too much trouble: would love a post on the little ones' reactions to one another when they were reunited. :) twins are so very pecial…

  27. Stephanie, Download Ben Harper singing "Beautiful Boy" by John Lennon, i thought of your sweet son when I heard it.

  28. im glad to hear things are getting better. He looks great, you can really see in their pictures that their bond is pretty strong.
    I think Lucas resembles your dad a lot. i'm sure he's happy.
    good luck to all of you.

  29. Oh, thank G-d. Thank G-d you get a bit of a break and some time to enjoy the beans. Still keeping you in my thoughts and hoping for more definitive answers – but so, so happy that you have these few days of peace and each other.

  30. What a beautiful picture of Lucas.Thinking of you and your family during this time. Although I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through, I just want you to know that I am also sending you and your family love and positive thoughts.

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