smell it

"Smell it."
"I can’t hear you."
"Oh come on, just smell it."  Silence.  "It’ll make me happy.  Please?"
"No."
"But it’s torture taking these vitamins.  Just smell it, so you know what I’m going through here!"

You can, anyone can, actually gag, I am certain, just from the smell of my vitamins.  They are so terribly potent.  The silver lining in my pool of bile?  I actually have long nails.  It’s shocking if you know me.  I can’t stop scratching or tapping on things.  Look, pretty.  Oooh.  Nails.  Clickity click.  Now smell my vitamin!!!!  It’s like the entire town of Bedrock in one pill, but the non-chewable dinosaur kind. So not like the bright purple Betty Rubble I got growing up.   

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COMMENTS:

  1. You are so right! They are the most horrible nasty things, but your hair and nails will never be better!

  2. Sitting here at my desk, at work, in Johannesburg, South Africa, reading about your grand night last night. Almost in tears at how everything's turned out for you. Its like you're living a movie.

    I see your dear dad in one photo. Why none of The Suitor? The Main Man.

    I am patiently waiting for my copy of your book to arrive at my front door.

    I send you great affection from
    Sunny South Africa

  3. Those vitamins smell worse than a backed-up cesspool. Puky plug dug-up by Dino. Upchuck everything. Even the vitameatavegamins. The signs still remain favorable for Pebbles & Bam Bam.

  4. I had really awful pre-natal vitamins, so I asked my OB for a prescription, and the RX ones I got had literally NO smell.

  5. UGH…I SOOOOO know what you mean! Its hideous! What I wouldnt give for a Betty or Fred!!!You know, Try the Chewable pre-natals…they are a little bit better!!!

  6. A friend of mine just told me last night you're actually supposed to start taking these before you even conceive *gag*….while giving me meaningful looks. I just got back from my honeymoon two weeks ago, will people please STOP THE BABY MADNESS :-(.

  7. It's your pregnancy super senses — that's the only reason you can smell whatever the rest of us couldn't. Not a single one of us even make a face when we sniffed the vitamin. Do you have other super powers, too?? ;)

  8. i had the same problem -natalle makes a rx version that was developed for people who had problems keeping them down. it worked for me!

    i also take mine at night, after dinner, which seems to help

  9. Vitamins are stinky in general. I hate taking them. Sometimes I eat my son's Scooby Doo vitamins which are jsut like the Flintstones ones. Do you find that you are getting "smell-sensitive" in pregnancy? I had a friend who couldn't stand the smell of carrots during her pregnancy. It grossed her out and made her puke. The human body is weird and amazing.

  10. Stephanie…those pre-natal vitamins are Mother Nature's way of inuring you to the future smells of baby poop, formula, and spoiled breast milk. Compared to those smells, the vitamins are like a bed of roses.

  11. Hmmmm. Thats weird. Mine have no smell. How is it that I dont smell a funky smell!? I thot pregnant women could smell everything! Apparently not, i have just learned.

  12. You've got to be ridiculously sick of all the unsoliticed pregnancy advice (and I've posted one tidbit already), but I HAVE to give you one more: Have you asked your OB about not taking the vitamins? I actually lost weight in my first trimester, not because I was puking, but because I just couldn't stomach eating. She told me to stop taking the vitamins, eat very, very healthy and take folic acid. And once I was over the nausea hump, I got back to the vitamins, and my baby girl turned out more than perfect.
    You're probably close to down with the nausea, but I can only imagine that it's been twice as bad for you!
    Congratulations!

  13. Here's a little secret: the beautiful "hair, nails" vitamins that they sell at GNC are just as good as the pre-natal ones (basically the same stuff) and are way easier to get down. I'm not a doctor, of course. . . but it's a thought.

  14. You may want to ask your doctor is you can take the Flintstones in place of your prenatal. I took them with my first pregnancy and I'm taking them with this pregnancy (I'm 12 weeks) too. I tried the regular prenatals with this time around (again!) and they made me so sick the doctor told me to get off them. He has me taking 2 Flintstones a day. Good luck!

  15. I remember not even being pregnant yet and getting sick from those damn horse pills.

    I took my pre-nates about 1/2 the time during my second pregnancy. Completely ditched 'em by my third.

    I have very shitty nails now.

  16. Did I just inadvertently stumble onto babycenter.com?

    Please don't become yet another interesting woman with lots of interesting things to say who all of a sudden ONLY wants to discuss being pregnant. Yes, it's wonderful / a miracle etc., but such details are not as riveting to everyone else as they are to you. I'm pregnant myself and couldn't imagine reporting to people on the smell of my prenatal vitamins. A bit here and there, fine – but if this blow by blow account of your pregnancy continues for its duration I think I'll take a break from your blog and check back in about 9 months to see if your writing gets interesting again.

  17. i haven't been keeping up on your blog, so i wanted to send you a belated congrats, mazel tov! (on both the book and the pregnancy, of course)

  18. Taking the vitamins at night before bed when your tummy is full will not make you nauseous. I couldn't take them during the day without feeling ill.

  19. I feel so selfish. I will truly miss your blogs once you're living the life of mom with twins. I just visited my friend with twins yesterday. Her life is completely different now, as yours is bound to be. I'm enjoying your book, and your writing about the pregnancy… hopefully I'll be knocked up soon too, we've been trying 4 months. Can't wait for all of it.

  20. Hilarious! I force my co-workers to smell my vitamins! They gag and I laugh histerically. Mine smell more like urine than anything else, and sometime I can't believe I actually take them, but the benefits are amazing. My hair is actually growing, and just like you I have beautiful nails that I love, clickty click back at ya. Definitely worth the awful smell and highlighter pee.

  21. Just got my copy of your book in the mail today. It is beautiful!!!! I want to hang it on my wall! I haven't started reading it yet, that will be for the train ride home tonight. Can't wait!

    -Sophie

  22. I am a very tired woman this morning. I couldn't sleep so I started reading your book and then completed it at 5:30 this morning. I cried, no, sobbed during parts of it because I recognized myself in so much of your writing.

    You give me hope Stephanie Klein. Hope that I will find my best self and a Suitor of my very own who will love me for being me, just like Philip loves you. Vomit and all.

  23. Thanks, jess, but even if you've never taken a vitamin for yourself, it's essential that you take them for healthy prenatal growth when you're pregnant.

    Stephanie, I thought I'd be the last one giving you annoying pregnancy advice, but take this in the neutral spirit it's given- my doctor has me on prescription Citracal prenatals. They're big, but they smell like vanilla. Believe me, it's the only way I could possibly choke a big vitamin down.

  24. Stephanie, write whatever you want – UTI, TTC, REA, SEX, DATING, WEDDINGS, GOSSIPPING,
    EAVESDROPPIMG, – doesn't matter to me. Your slant on life and how you view yourself in and out of context is what is appealing about your writing. As for the smell of the prenatals and pregnancy having an effect on your smelling abilities – I can say that there are many vitamins, antibiotics and other medications I have taken over the years and at various times had to stop taking because of the smell. If it stinks – my nose will smell it! :) Congrats on the fabulous turnout and the book release – I've already passed my copy on to my girlfriends as required reading!

  25. LOL, I love the comments from people who think a blog should cater to them and their interests, or even those of all readers as a whole. Hello, you stumbled upon this blog, and you can choose to read it or not. No one should edit their own thoughts or feelings just to suit someone else's tastes (there's a term for that: selling out). Honesty, in and of itself, is delicious.

  26. So true, Sar and Jody – this blog is like chatting to a girlfriend, about all of lifes aspects, both the important ones and the less important ones. Of course you are filled up with the baby-issue now, Stephanie – if you weren't, you'd be odd!
    Keep up the good work – I have only just found this blog, but I truly enjoy it!

    Love from Denmark
    Kirsten :-)

  27. Ditto…

    I have been reading for almost a year now and enjoy every post! Thank you giving us a glimpse of your life. I feel sorry for those who choose to read this blog and then criticize you or your writing…they must have such an unhappy life to say such things!

    Also, I pre-ordered your book on Amazon and it still hasn't arrived! I am patiently waiting…

    Much joy to you, the Suitor and your growing babies

    I ASKED ABOUT THIS AT THE PUBLISHER AND THEY THOUGHT PERHAPS THERE WERE OTHER THINGS IN YOUR ORDER THAT WERE DELAYED AND YOU REQUESTED ALL TO BE SHIPPED TOGETHER. PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT HAPPENS.

  28. As a male fan of this blog-I agree with Sar Jody and Kristen. As a reader of this blog you make the choice to read this work of art. People complaining about what Stephanie writes are just like the people who complain about what is on TV but continue to watch it.

  29. I agree with Ann. I realize this is your first baby (that you'll be keeping anyway) but women have been having babies for a long time. This stuff is boring.

  30. The "original" blog to what it is now is a complete 360 – I still value your talented writing, but miss that fun gal running around Manhattan. You have likely lost a lot of your past readers (think, those who like to watch Sex in the City), but will gain a new following (think, those who watch The Learning Channel's Baby Story).

  31. I switched to Prenate Ultra, which I think are now called Prenate Advance during my first pregnancy. They were still horse pills but had a vanilla scent….much better. No reason to suffer. Ask your ob for something different. Congrats!!! You are so cute.

  32. I'm not sure what people expect Stephanie to write about…do they still want to hear stories about her hanging out at Bungalow 8 last night?? It seems to me that she's always just written about her life and musings on what she happens to be experiencing that day…these days it happens to be pregnancy and book tours (and sometimes wedding planning, love those posts !).

    One thing I admire about about Stephanie's writing (and photography) is that a lot of the subject matter IS pretty mundane, but she looks at seemingly boring things in in a different way and is able to eloquently express them so they become interesting or beautiful or entertaining.

    And I totally agree with Kirsten, if she weren't writing about pregnancy right now I'd be worried!!

  33. Uggg! I hate the smell of vitamins. My ob let me take Centrum chewable for my last pregnancy. They didn't smell and they tasted so much better. You might want to see if you can take those plus a chewable is so much easier to take than those huge prenatal monster vitamins.

  34. ask your ob for a script for citracal. I started taking them after my trader joe's prenatals literally made me barf. my ob/gyn's wife can't swallow pills and she munched on flinstone vitamins during two healthy pregnancies. the only reason I went for the grown up version is because I would eat too many of the flinstones if given the chance. remember atomic fireballs, too. and congrats on the success of your book!!

  35. Ohhhh, I was sooo sick from my prenatal vitamins. I switched to Flintstones but that ended up a mistake, as I got anemic toward the end. Prenatals are loaded with the extra iron while kiddie ones go light on it because of the risk of poisoning.

    So my advice? Eat lots of meat! And beans!

    Congrats on a fabulous night in New York with the book signing.

  36. I have an issue with vitamins for that very reason – i cannot stand the smell. It makes me gag. The only vitamin i can take is the chewable fruit flavored C – they're tangy and sour and have no vitamin taste whatsoever.

    Urf – just thinking about that smelll…and they're not event the prenatal kind.

  37. Not to stray off-topic, but when are you coming out here to LA for a reading? I only recently discovered your blog, but I've been hooked ever since I found it. Your website doesn't give much info as far as dates and locations for your appearances outside of NYC. Could you post that info, perhaps?

  38. Just started reading your blog, wow. I can relate to what you said about blogs being the perfect place to asess your life and vent.

    After reading Mimi in NY I had preconcieved ideas, but I think sometimes writing a blog that is all about you, is necessary in order to learn about yourself, where you're going and who you want to be.

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