drivel

In ALL, DRUNKEN BLOGGING by Stephanie Klein50 Comments

There are some really sorry lame-ass people out there.  This kind of behavior is usually seen as rudimentary, childish, really.  But I can’t help it.  It shocks me, still, that there are people out there who devote their time and energy into hating me.  A sport, really.  How unhappy must you be with yourself?  The only person I’ve ever bashed is Tony Danza.  I beg you to defend, yet I still regret it.    He’s sweet enough, I know.  But it’s so much easier to knock someone down than it is to create your own success.  It’s the easy way out.  So really, I’m rarely negative, about anyone except for myself, or my suitor.  Anyone in any type of relations knows there will be faults thrown at "the other," even those we love.  Isn’t that the point?  We hate in others what we hate in ourselves.  This isn’t news. 

I’ve just come from the Da Vinci Code, questioning.  "Why on earth was that movie ever produced?"  Well, it would make money, I thought.  People bought into the book.  It’s creative, I continued.  "Recreating history is all well and good, but to what extent?  I mean, what was the message?" 

"I’ll speak with you about it tomorrow.  You’re being annoying," The Suitor said as he navigated 2222 (Bull Creek Road), in the dark of night.  I gripped the side of the door.  It’s a windy road I avoid at night.  He was avoiding me.  I would have gone down on him, would have given him anything before those words escaped.  Then, after brunting his terse reply, I folded into myself.  He went to hold my hand, and I recoiled with my body, pulling my hand toward me, but my voice offered more: "What are all those cars doing parked by the side of that cliff?" I asked.  It was the official change of subject that just went by.  And in it, he’d forgotten my withdrawal, because in my voice, I was asking for more of him.  It’s what we are capable of.  Turning things.  When we’re ready.  The story we want to tell. So this Mary Magdalene was the ticket, the important code we should keep?  When we look to what the man has to say, we’re looking too hard?  Women matter more?

I’m sitting beside our bed, still in my going out clothes.  He’s in bed, a white undershirt and pink striped boxers, shorts I’d given him for a holiday.  He’s folded into our bed, with a remote and my dog, who is now our dog, but really, loyal to me, more.  He thinks he holds everything in that button, on the remote, thinks it’s in his hands, that fate.  But it’s me.  I matter just as much.  And I have a memory that folds beyond him, to all that threatens and weakens him, to a life of hims that came before.  It amazes me how powerful each of us think we are, when really there’s so little we decide.  We’re animals, surviving, in the pupils and nerves of what we cannot fake.

Comments

  1. Does The Suitor read your blog? I know my husband couldn't find mine if it landed onto his head in the shape of a blow-up doll posted with my address right across the tits.

    Just wondering what he thinks of Greek Tragedy? (Didn't you meet through the blog, and can you direct readers to that beginning encounter? I never read it)

    I just picture you tap-tap-tapping away in bed, trying to move your pup closer to your side to prove it's your dog and not his, and not speaking to him, yet he knows you're writing about the non-fight (because the guy usually thinks it wasn't a fight while the chick is fuming for days) you both just had and he can read all your thoughts tomorrow…

    I wonder sometimes if my husband took the time to read my blog, would he be unsure of who he married, or would he say, "Yep, sounds about right!"???

  2. You withdrew your hand, then made up for it with an engaging comment so as to avoid getting into an argument over your withdrawal. Another time you may have withdrew your hand obviously so as to get in the fight.. Depends on the mood, right?

    God, I marvel over that shit all the time. Here I've been married two years.. and you think that at some point, those tiny games end, but they never really do.. It's always a tennis match, a volley, back and forth, whether we know it or not.. it's like blinking… it just keeps happening. Continual mood assessments, decisions on how to respond to our partners moods.. shall I indulge his bad temper and play the optimist or should I lob my own negativity his way because I can't muster the positivity..

    And the beat goes on…

  3. This post seemed sort of confusing and all over the place, until I saw the tag for it. I hope you had a good night, and I hope people stop devoting their lives to hating you and perhaps focus this misguided energy into something far more charitable.

  4. Let me start this by saying I am a fan, but…

    What people hate about you is your personality coupled with your success, Stephanie. People read your blogs and want to kill themselves when they find out you have a book coming out and a potential TV series down the road. They hate that you have money because you posted your diary online. I don't think they would hate you for your success if you were more likable…it's just you have the ability to really rub people the wrong way, so your haters hate you more for being that type of person and successful.

    Quite frankly, you can be a snob at times. You come from a privileged background and you wax about summers spent at camps that cost thousands of dollars to attend. While no one says you haven't worked for some of your success, you still have to admit that you have led a privileged life and it's not all your grit and determination that brought that privilege to you. You're not a pull up the bootstraps kind of success story to most of us.

    Most of us work very hard and still can't afford the restaurants you frequent. I make a good living but I know I'll never spend a week in the Hamptons and get to do Italy in the same year. I can't afford those kind of luxuries.

    I go from thinking you're very deep and moving to thinking you're a vapid idiot. I'd say it's 50/50 on when I dislike you vs. when I like you…but you still hold my attention. I tend to think you're a very good writer although when I decide I don't like you I don't read your whole post.

    That said, I like this post. It's honest and you show your vulnerability…although it's not really likable at times. Either way, it's insightful.

  5. 2222, aka Bull Creek, aka Koenig Lane, aka The Death Road that Terrifies Me Too, Especially at Night.

    You write pretty.

  6. You know as well as I do, when you have a page online, EVERYONE will see it and not everyone's going to love it, but when they reallllly care about you, in a good way or not, they'll show you.

    "love you or hate you, they're still thinking about you"

  7. Bashing Tony Danza. That is the worst thing I have EVER read. Tony Danza is like a sweet little puppy begging for a biscuit.

    You know, Stephanie, I really liked this blog before I read that you bash Tony Danza. I admired you for your book deal, the television series, your brilliant photography…etc.. I still can't help but love your hair, but that's another story.

    All of this took effort, a ton of hard work, luck, a huge bottle of Infusium, and support that you cultured from keeping friends, family and solid people around you. So how could anyone hate you for that? Jealousy/envy/self-hate. Yes/yes/yes, all of the above.

    I was willing to hurdle all of these feelings within myself, about you, but really about me… until that Tony Danza comment.

  8. Ok, I know I risk the wrath of your army of sychophants, but I need to set the record straight.
    You put yourself out there Stephanie, you have made a lot of money from this – its a 2 way street, and people's disapproval is the price you pay for your extremely privledged lifestyle – you get to sit by a pool while you do your job for gods sake! You are perfectly happy to reap the rewards from blogging, but you gotta take the good with the bad – if you don't like it, don't do it.
    Complaining about people who are mean to you is disingenous – like those celebs who are more than happy with the money and privledges their status affords them, but don't like the press intrusion -it's the price you pay – you know that before you get into it.

  9. I know all about what you get when you make your life public. I'm still allowed to complain about it from time to time. The more people who have access to you, the more you'll know they love you, the more you know they hate you. I'm well aware. I can bitch about it, though, especially when drunk.

    And my Tony Danza comment is about REGRET. I regret being mean-spirited about his show a long time ago. I should have kept my mouth shut.

    Now, as for my work-ethic… please. People have this wrong. So listen. I was working in advertising, full-time, then working nights (when I wasn't stuck at the office) photographing events for the press. So between shooting red-carpet events, shooting art for the hotel gansevoort, and shooting pro-bono for Lincoln Center YPS, and keeping a VP job in advertising, I kept a blog, but much more importantly, I took writing classes and worked for SIX MONTHS on a book proposal. I took photography classes. Plural. I invested in myself. I didn't happen upon anything. So, I didn't just blog and then wake up with a book/tv deal. People forget that. I work hard for the things I want. I know others work hard too. I've been fortunate. I'm lucky. I'm also very thankful.

  10. "What people hate about you is your personality coupled with your success, Stephanie. People read your blogs and want to kill themselves when they find out you have a book coming out and a potential TV series down the road. They hate that you have money because you posted your diary online. I don't think they would hate you for your success if you were more likable…it's just you have the ability to really rub people the wrong way, so your haters hate you more for being that type of person and successful."

    G – do not presume to speak for the rest of us who read this blog. Your statements show that you resent the success of someone you do not know and have never met. You are claiming that Stephanie is not "likeable", yet you don't know Stephanie. You claim the Stephanie is a "snob" because she writes about her upbringing and her life — why do you assume that anyone who's parents were able to give them some of the finer things in life is a snob? You are claiming that much of Stephanie's financial success has something to do with this "privileged" background — do you honestly think that a publisher or tv producer would put insane amounts of money on the line based on Stephanie's social contacts or vacation destinations?
    "hate…kill themselves…snob…vapid idiot…". My goodness, G. Work on the self-esteem issues.

  11. I'm sorry that people are such jerks. I don't understand it. I have had my jealous moments of you, but not in a mean spirited way. More of in a, she has the life I would love and she has the best hair, kinda way. I randomly came across a blog of a person who had said something nasty about me and then I found she had said even worse things about you and admitted to frequently posting nasty and occasionally fake comments on here. When I read the rest of her blog I realized she was an unhappy person who couldnt get a book deal and was really frustrated and jealous of you because you did have one. I dont have a book deal, but instead of acting like a jackass about it, I read you for inspiration, and because you seem like someone Id like in real life. Plus, if anything, you showed me how to tie a scarf into a shirt when I asked you. I love scarves as shirts! This is too long, but as an aside, I did this in Sax, with a 400$ scarf, over my shirt to see how it would look and thought I would get in trouble, but instead caused a small sensation with the sales people because they said they never thought of it and would use that angle to sell more scarves! Anyway, to hell with Stephanie bashers. Ignore them.

  12. As Stephanie's book editor, I can testify that no one has a better work ethic. I often accuse her of being a goody-goody because she never misses a deadline, never complains, and always gives 100%. You don't have to agree with everything she says–that's what free speech is all about, people.

  13. I don't "hate" you, but I often think you young. That's not a criticism; I was once young, too.

    It's just that sometimes when I read you, I feel my age and realize some of the things I've learned that came with it. I bet in future years when you read back, you will see your youth as well. I bet we all would if we had kept journals.

    I think for those of us who are many years past where you are, some of your points come across as typical for your age: extrememly self-assured but rather naive, pretty much par for the course. Some of us are able to see that and be amused by the universal nature of youth. Others seem to have lost any patience for youth and all it brings.

    Personally, I'm just glad you aren't wishy-washy. I think you make mistakes pretty often (but no more often than most people your age), but I respect the way you jump in with both feet. You seize life (and sometimes choke the living hell out of it), but you are never vague about what you are feeling and you don't back down and temper the senitment the first time somone looks at you sideways.

  14. Hear, hear Bobette. People go to camp on scholarship all the time, just like people going to college on scholarship. I don't know Stephanie either but to assume that she led and leads a privileged life is way off base. I could assume that Stephanie knows how to make all the right connections with the right people and that she does "pull up her bootstraps" to obtain the kind of success story most of us only dream about. Am I jealous? Do I hate her for having the wherewithal to accomplish all that she has? Hell no, it inspires me to push myself to do more to be more. Money isn't everything either. At the end of the day, you have to be happy with who you are. To me, Stephanie seems like a very happy person. You go girl Stephanie and continued success and working by the pool and going to Italy and the Hamptons in the same year (maybe even the same month), and getting married and making babies!

  15. relationship survival depends on one thing: dispensing of the personal ego. if both parties realize that communicating real feeling and real thoughts are more important than childish "tomorrow i will communicate how i feel today" bs.. i truly feel for ya steph.. i was stuck in a relationship for a few years were my "other half" would never say anything.. bottle it up and then blow.. manic ? your suitor needs to get over himself and start by giving you a thousand smooches a day.. flowers every other and nights dedicated to a wonderful romance..

  16. I'm guessing about 90% of the posters in here adore you, and maybe 10% don't. But all that is meaningless. The people who adore you know almost nothing about you. The same goes for those that hate you. The readers feel a part of your life, since that's what you post. But 100 words every other day is a miniscule part of your life.

    Taking today's post as an example. No one knows what precipitated the argument between you and TS. Maybe you gave him crap the entire day. Maybe he gave you crap the entire day. Even best friends don't really know what goes on inside a marriage, simply because they only see one side. So the fact that some in here like you, and some don't, is meaningless.

    But, TS should never have passed on the opening you gave him to change the subject. I'm betting that that is how about 99% of arguments end. You start discussing something new, you forget about the argument, and then you let the natural attraction bring you back together.

  17. "It is to the credit of human nature that, except where its selfishness is brought into play, it loves more readily than it hates." ~ Nathanial Hawthorne.

    The selfish people have a crappy work ethic when it comes to embracing all kinds of wonderful human spirits.

    Cheers, Steph.

  18. i agree with G in every possible way. I really think that Stephanie and a lot of the readers are living in a complete dream world where "problems" are weight-issues and how hard it is shooting red carpet events. come on! are you REALLY using that as your cred? must people would give anything to be able to have those jobs.

  19. You know, thing that always amazes me about the negative comments is that you rarely see any that are based upon Stephanies writing. They are almost always petty and mean spirited and directed towards Stephanie the person. It is sad, really.

    Look at it this way Stephanie, if they are slamming you, they are leaving someone else alone. Not much in the way of relief from it, but it puts it in a different light.

    Much continued success Stephanie, I for one believe you have truly earned it. Please do not let the haters shadow your thoughts about writing what you feel or cause you to second guess, it would truly be a shame. I find your views, feelings and opinions quite refreshing because they are REAL and not culled to gear to the masses in hopes of popularity.

    Keep on keepin' on…and please, bring on the book already! ;)

  20. OK. I've got to say this. First, I'm a big fan of people expressing their opinions, both positive and negative, in theory of course, because everyone would ideally have nothing but glowing praise when I post on my site, or Stephanie posts on hers, etc.

    But with an open forum comes great vulnerability, and oftentimes a slew of nasty words. Some people are jealous. Some are hateful for other reasons. I've been hated just because I reminded someone of someone else. To be blunt, it sucks. It's hard not to be liked. It's exhausting to be judged. But even more, it's hard to keep a blog that is expected of so much. Keep it fresh, entice readers, keep it positive and keep it real. So when one gets bashed on her own ground, and for a post that wasn’t even egotistical, it’s tough to see. This is a place that Stephanie created. For herself, sure, but also for us. For free entertainment, for a conversation starter, for an inspiration, whatever.

    And it’s hard for some people to get, but the blog was only a myriad of projects that brought Stephanie to where she is today. I know a blogger or two that has been jettisoned to success, and while the shiny polished ideal is that it happened just from posting, that couldn't be further from the truth. It takes PR skills, rejection, multiple jobs, laborious book proposal writing, chapter after chapter getting sent out so people can bleed their red pens all over it, and working the room and events when you want to be home on the couch watching reruns and eating quesadillas. Now I'm not saying that the fruits of all this labor are not utterly fabulous in many ways; the bold-faced names, the parties, even a decent check for once—these are all great things, and lofty goals many of us have. But I think this stuff takes a lot of work that isn't visible to the naked eye, and needs to be acknowledged.

    And for once, you'd think, that we could actually be happy for someone. Someone who has been called every name in the book, someone who wakes up to a full inbox not from friends checking in, but oftentimes insulting rants, or even worse, gold-digging and money grubbing requests from "friends" that come out of the woodwork.

    Yes, because of the great things that have come, I believe Stephanie doesn't expect anyone to feel sorry for her. Certainly not, she worked damn hard, and still works damn hard to live a good life.

    But for people to come on here to sling mud–that's just too much. Come on, people who make something from nothing should be models for the rest of us on how work and determination pay off, not a platform for soap-box monologues that say because she was able to afford some nice scarves along the way, she doesn't deserve it.

  21. Frankly I think the people on both sides of the SK fence take themselves (and this blog) way too seriously. It may seem like Stephanie is the center of the universe (and I suppose for some of you more…obsessive types, she may be) but the truth is most people have never heard of her.

    Not one person I know (and I know many – most of them in the arts and publishing) has the slightest idea who Stephanie Klein is – nor would they be interested to find out. I don't expect that will change much – even after the book comes out.

    No matter how it's gussied up (and I do think the book design is genius, Stephanie) Straight Up & Dirty will never be anything more than chicklit. So why get so worked up about it?

  22. Steph,
    What is that makes you 'ok' having your life in public… I want to know where the strength come from. I can not tolerate people gossip and judge about me with little info& assumption they've got. I live in a city where small community of Japanese are hungry for gossip. I find myself paranoid by those people. I know I have no control over what people say, I can only change my attitude. But it's been so hard.

  23. My opinion is that if you discuss something in a blog, and you allow comments, then it's open for discussion. That said, however, the comments about your weight or appearance are mean, petty, uncalled for and say a lot more about the person making the remark than they do about you. I would delete those kind of remarks if I were you.

  24. The darlings have had this question before – "why does ___ hate me? I've done nothing to them." I explain over and over – some people are haters. They hate you because you're beautiful. They hate you because you're smart and talented. They hate you because you live in a nice house, in a great neighborhood, surrounded by a family who loves you unconditionally. They hate you because you're doted on and adored. Maybe they don't live that life of privilege. Few people do. So instead of hating back, feel compassion and pity for them. Continue to be nice to them – because to not be empowers them and brings you to their level.

    A tough lesson, but then it's a tough world – especially for the haters. Be strong and put good out into the world cuz that's what comes back to you.

    I think you are doing amazing things Stephanie. Cheers to you. (Lifting my cup of tea to the computer).

  25. Stephanie thank you for sharing with all of us. What we think, good or bad, we are still here reading. Your contribution is what is important.

  26. Oh my god, what is with people assuming that the reason people dislike you is cos they're jealous – that is such a base Paris Hilton response. Most everyone has lots of successful people that they like and admire.
    No, using jealousy as an excuse is a pretty easy way of avoiding looking at yourself and believe it or not, you provide plenty of other reasons for others to dislike you:

    1. Your total self-absorption – I know this is your personal blog, and you can write whatever you like, and blah blah blah, but there is lots going on in the world around you, and you NEVER seem to have anything to say about any of it – which is narcissism to the point of creepiness, and I think a lot of people find that really off-putting (I laughed out loud when I saw that the book cover you picked was the one with dozens of pics of yourself – of course it was)

    2. You seem to lack a lightness of touch or any kind of humour about yourself – you take yourself way too seriously (again, it goes back to the self-absorption). There are other blogs out there that are just as, if not more, successful than yours – Dooce for example – but these bloggers do not get nearly the amount of personal attack that you do, and I think its cos they've learned a thing or two about self-deprecation.

    3. The way you never seem to take any type of criticism on board – you put yourself out there (my guess is because you thrive on the adoration you get on these boards) but can only take it when the millionth person writes the same banal shite – "beautiful post stephanie" (mind you, your fans are also “devoted fans of INXS – ‘nuff said)

    4.Your writing has an air of desperation about it – a real need for approval from others. You can just tell that you Google yourself all the time.

    6. This one is not really your fault, but I think people get really fed up with all those adoring fans, defending you regardless of what you say or do, and praising whatever you write, as if it is the word of god – sadly for you I think you have to bear the brunt of peoples frustration with some of your commenters.

    I know that I don't know you personally – and I could be way way off the mark in my analysis – but I'm just calling it like I see it, from the stuff that you post.
    I am not disputing that you have worked hard for what you’ve got, and respect for possessing the ability to write in a way that keeps people wanting more.

    You have many staunch defenders – and that is cool – they're entitled to their opinions (and this post is just mine), and I am sure instead of taking any of this on board, you will ignore, which is totally your prerogative, but please remember that people who diss you are not necessarily jealous – maybe, based on your writing, they just don’t like you. The same way lots of people who read this blog obviously think you’re the bees knees – they don’t know you either but are allowed to adore you .
    Is it that hard to believe that some people won’t adore you, not cos of envy or anything – just cos they don’t like what you have to say?

  27. No insult intended DssCAN, but honestly, can a person who knows to use the proper spelling of prerogative not type out the word 'because'? It makes your whole comment look trite.

  28. 2222 is called many things, but not Bull Creek Road, despite it crossing Bull Creek. You can find Bull Creek Road near Mopac and 45th Street. As for people not liking you, I don't really know. I saw you at Central Market once and you looked a bit high strung for my taste, but maybe you were just excited to be here in Austin.

  29. Bobbette–Actually I have met Stephanie several times in real life over the course of many years and here's my impression — she's hard to like.

    There are some people in this world who are so in your face and just trying so hard to be noticed. Stephanie is one of those people.

    I am positive Stephanie has a wonderful heart. I have no doubt that when she feels something she feels it deeply…but she does kind of just stomp through life.

    I don't hate her because I read her and understand why she is insecure and how she's just looking for love and happiness…but just because someone's heart is in the right place doesn't necessarily make them likable.

    She asked a question in her post as to being shocked that people take the time and effort to "hate" her. I don't hate her, but I don't see her as Oprah either. I think she's lucky and that's not a criticism. I just see her as a woman with self esteem issues who led a pretty privelged life with as many ups and downs as most of us have and used her talent to write and commuincate to work out some of her shit. That's not a bad thing, it's just what she is.

  30. Your blog is your business, this is very transparent. (That Q&A from a couple of days ago was clearly an audition, for what, Jane?).

    As soon as readers realize this, the better, the haters hate you for posing and maybe then they will stop and finally get it.

  31. "Brunting"? This is not a word. Perhaps you meant "absorbing"?

    Make that …

    7. Stephanie, you need to work on basic writing skills. Passive voice + made-up words = remedial writing classes.

    M. DICTION- READ THE TOPIC…

  32. DssCan,

    You really need to get a life. Stephanie is who she is. All this obsessive hate towards her does no one any good.

    Much love.

  33. I just had to post because Mystery Girl's comment made me laugh so hard:
    "Not one person I know (and I know many – most of them in the arts and publishing) has the slightest idea who Stephanie Klein is – nor would they be interested to find out. I don't expect that will change much – even after the book comes out."

    Is that a criticism? Ooh, that must sting! People that Mystery Girl knows DON'T know Stephanie Klein!

    Tell me, Steph, how will you continue to live, knowing that?

    PS – I know many people too, but I have not yet surveyed them about their knowledge of Stephanie Klein.

  34. "Brunting" should be a word, especially to the drunken who bear the brunt of their own burdens come morning. Ahem.

  35. ditto to Love … and just because i love inxs, that does not make me banal, DssCAN … stop judging people. why do people think that all blogs have to be social commentary or political opinions!? why can't they just be streams of consciousness and let it be.

  36. DssCAN doesn't seem to be a big fan of counting either. It's not just spelling that's more difficult than criticizing, hmm?

  37. g- EMAIL ADDRESSES ARE MASKED HERE TO PROTECT COMMENTORS FROM SPAM

  38. "I'm rarely negative" Are you serious? I have read your site. You reflect negatively on all sorts of people and things, in this very post, a paragraph later you are negatvely sarcastic about the DaVinci Code.
    I think that in a majority of the posts you are negative. Very little of it has a feeling of bouyancy, most of it leaves me feeling your discomfort with seemingly everything.

  39. mp –
    as someone who has worked in one of "those jobs" that most people would "love to have" i can tell you that advertising and photography are fun and glamorous for the first week or two and after that it is any other career. yes there are cool perks depending on the company, but that is about 2% of the total package, the other 98% is hard work. you don't get a jobs shooting red carpet events and designing major ad campaigns by sitting home and wishing.

    as for tony danza, have you ever seen "the soup" on e, HIlarious!!

  40. It all comes down to the medium. We watch tv and because we don't have the outlet to write the comment, we give a little slack. conversely, here when someone is consistent, writes, asks for nothing, opens wounds we all feel, make us think, get angry, laugh, etc., we feel the right to chime in on them personally. Get over yourselves people. Every comment here is full of assumptions that would probably take Stephanie Klein hours to show are inaccurate but why do it. Just let the misinformed vent based on nothing. Be happy you have a voice here. Why no thank you or congratulations to Stephanie for that? How much $ has she asked from you? None, you say? then accept the blog for what it is. Don't like it, don't read it. Create something of your own for once. Accept that most people won't like it, care about it, eat it, see it… Walk in someone elses shoes before you judge.

    Oh, and shut up already.

  41. 1. The impression that you are out of touch, for me, comes from some earlier posts making fun of delivery boys, maintenence men, or anyone else in a service position, especially if they are of a different race. I've read posts where you make fun of accents. Not cool, not enlightened, and doesn't do much to establish that you are in touch with very much other than a narrow slice of rich New York (and now Austin).

    2. You are the beneficiary of good timing. Had you been late to the blog game there would have been no book, no TV deal, and far fewer readers. Someone else would have beaten you to the punch. Hard work counts for something, but sometime good timing is even more important. If Greek Tragedy started from the beginning today someone else would have already taken your place as the lay-it-all-on-the-line female blogger.

    3. Who is anyone kidding that your privileged life didn't contribute to your landing a book and TV deal? Your divorce, abortion, and re-entry into single life wouldn't have attracted the attention of publishers had you been Stephanie Klein, checkout girl. Judith Regan isn't in the business of publishing tell-alls from poor girls from the projects. There are plenty of poor people with your exact story, minus the nights out at clubs, shopping sprees, and dinner parties. You fit a desirable demographic. Stephanie Klein minus the "fabulous" life would still be toiling away in relative anonymity.

    I think what irks people is that you don't seem to address the impact luck has had on your life. Hard work? I'm sure it took a lot of time and effort to put together a book proposal, but hard work does not guarantee success. What it boils down to is that for someone who so frequently talks about brutal honesty there is the feeling that you aren't all that honest. With us or with yourself.

  42. There was a time when I loved to criticize you and what you wrote and thought, but then I realized that it came from something like resentment, and you know how easy it is to convey resentment in this anonymous venue, how it can sometimes seem like sport. MY bottom line is this: I have become a semi-devoted reader, for whatever reason. You are interesting and you write crazy things and I've got your blog as a Favorite, one I check nearly every day.

    Hate the playah (and Tony Danza).

  43. "We're animals, surviving, in the pupils and nerves of what we cannot fake."
    Now, see, that's beautiful. That's what you do best. Your descriptions of observed detail, and your ability to take everyday states of mind and give them dignity shows talent. Your early blog entries have sentences like this in spades. Sigh. If only you did more of that… but then who am I to dictate?

    Re: hating you. I comment negatively when I think your posts are particularly shallow or callous. And there have been a few of those. Generally, you're a good writer. And whether you deserve your success more or less than others, well, whatever.
    And generally, as far as "who you are," I detest this tendency to deify or destroy you. I know people that know you, and they have both good and less good things to say. I think you are what all of us are, sometimes shallow, sometimes deep, you try to be caring and do the right thing, etc. No one is all good or all bad. Shades of grey, people, shades of grey.

  44. I like visiting here every few days to see what you (Steph) are up to and hope to read something fun, or insightful, or whatever.

    But lately I seem to quickly skim your writing and go right to the comments. This is my fault, I think, for being drawn into the schadenfreude-inducing comments section. It says more about me than it does about you or your fans or your haters.

    Note to self: read what Klein has to say and move on. The comments section feeds what is negative in me. Read Klein, yes. Read comments, no.

  45. I appreciated your candor and hard work. I've met you a few times and always walk away with how sincere, caring and open you are to meeting people who think they know you. Can't wait to know the whole story when the book comes out.

  46. i think that, with creativity and the courageousness to live your life publically, come the haters. there will always be people who look at a painting and say "i could have done better in 3rd grade", but secretly wish that they could be half as talented.

    if i didn't enjoy your writing, or your slices of your life, i would not come back each lunch break to see what's new with you, some stranger whose blog i came upon one day while work-place procrastinating. i would move on with my life and read cnn.com instead.

    as for your success … rock on, girl!

    honestly … i don't deny anyone their successes in life … okay, maybe paris hilton, but other than her! i am a devoted fan of inxs … the old inxs … and while i think that the band sold out in finding a new singer, i do not deny that singer his success. it takes a lot for anyone to achieve what they consider to be happiness … and pissing on that is just rude.

    i look forward to buying and reading your book … i look forward to more tales of austin … i look forward to your point of view. and screw those who think otherwise. :)

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