After re-reading this, I know it makes very little sense. I know because I’m squinting trying to understand my logic. I’m recording the answers to a myers-briggs test so I can take it again in a year or so to see if I’ve changed noticably. I have answered all questions and will post them in the coming days along with my "score" and analysis. I’ve done this a few times before, and each time my score is slightly different. Last year, I was INTP.
My girlfriend Dulce was ENTJ, and Alexandra was ESTJ. These two make plans for me. I show up. This year my results were quite different in two categories. A guy friend of mine whom I really think of as the male version of me scored an ENFJ score. My father is an ISFJ. My friend Derek, an ESFP, noted "It makes no distinction, however, for the difference between what one exudes and what one actually *feels*." The Suitor took the test a year ago, also, and netted out as an ENFJ (22,25, 38, 33). I find this very interesting because I consider him my complete opposite (Mr. Aries), yet he has the same score as the male me. I told him our relationship was described as "Pedagogue." Each is both the other’s mentor and student, has a parent to child feel. To which he responded, "Who’s your daddy? has a new sound to it now." He used to be funny. I used to be cute. Oh wait, I was the funny one. Just re-read the email. The who’s your daddy line was mine.
As a rule, current preoccupations worry you more than your future plans.
I have no idea. Right now, and this is somehow hard to admit, I have everything I’ve ever wanted. I’ll spare you the list. I know I’m preoccupied, know there’s too much cortisol going on around here, have the fat to prove it, (also purchased some green tea to help with it) but really, am I preoccupied about now or later? I guess later because now is great. But, if now were crap, I’d worry about now. But if now were indeed craptastic it certainly isn’t "as a rule?" I genuinely have no idea how to answer. I guess I just assume everything is going to work out in the future, so I don’t worry too much about it. I mean, really, aside from contributing to a 401k and brushing my teeth once in a while, what else is there to plan? I’ll answer N.
You find it difficult to talk about your feelings.
You feel at ease in a crowd.
Like how much of a crowd? Concert crowds are okay as long as there’s somewhere to sit. But a crowded sports bar where they really only serve pitchers of beer or hard alcohol? I definitely do not feel at ease there. I hate that shit. HATE. I also hate having to stand in a crowd, especially if that crowd is in Duane Reade. Slow people. I’m not at ease with slow people. A crowd of strangers at a party where I have to smile and be polite, no. I HATE that. I think of myself as a social being, but it really depends on who the beings are. If, for instance, they’re friends of in-laws, I’d rather get waxed without Advil. And now, the idea of a crowd of bloggers makes me itchy. Unless there’s food. Good food. Little hot dogs. I can endure almost any crowd provided they’ve got mushrooms in philo cups. I’ll answer Y.
You do your best to complete a task on time.
A task on time? ALWAYS. I’m a nerd when it comes to work. Or as my editor says, "a goodie goodie." I hand in everything right away, on time. Except, ask me to meet you for dinner or a movie, and it’s, "why don’t you go ahead and pick the seats. I’ll be there by the time previews end." Y.
You are strongly touched by the stories about people’s troubles.
Not really. I’ll cry at the worst chick flick ever, yet give me a real-life horror story, and I’ll hear the words come from my mouth. I’ll hear, "that’s so horrible," but I won’t cry. I cry by manipulation. I need music to swell and the underdog to win. This seems like something I should be ashamed of. It seems cold, but I don’t think of myself as a cold person. My answer to this question, actually, bothers me. This isn’t who I think I am. Answer N.
You are more interested in a general idea than in the details of its realization.
I don’t even know what this means. I need to break it down slowly to understand what I’m answering. Ah, clearly by needing to do this my answer should be N. Do I only care about the big idea or its granular execution? Well, I like the idea of Austin, TX, but am I ready for the burbs? Am I ready to speak to people who mention Jesus when speaking of their morning? I think I like ideas, and I care less about the nitty gritty of them. It’s why I like the idea of camping. No one mentions mosquitoes. They mention marshmallows and flashlights. I’m an idea girl. Y.
Strict observance of the established rules is likely to prevent a good outcome.
At first, I responded, "No way. You want to get somewhere, break some rules. You only live once. N." But now (thanks to a comment) I realize I mis-read the statement. Will following rules and laws prevent a good outcome? Well, it depends on the rules, right? You might follow the rules, but that doesn’t guarantee success. It also doesn’t prevent it. Somehow though, I’m anti-rules and believe training people to follow them strictly is asking for a vanilla world. It reminds me of my favorite Harry Chapin song, "Flowers are red," where a young boy colors flowers all the colors of the rainbow until his teacher scolds, "flowers are red!" and has him draw only red flowers. It makes me sad. Answer Y.
Often you prefer to read a book than go to a party.
Okay, I don’t know about good book, but tonight, for example, 4 different people invited me out to play. Some to parties. Some to dinner. Some for happy hour. And I’m sitting home, with my makeup on, heels fastened, jeans tight. And I’m not going anywhere. I’d rather sit inside alone and think about reading a good book. Maybe I’ll watch a bad movie and pick up a book I’m mid-way through. Answering Y because it’s not just tonight. I do this often. I don’t know why. Sometimes it takes too much energy to smile at people. I’d rather sit at a bar alone with a good book and fall into easy conversation with a couple as they wait for their dinner table.
You tend to rely on your experience rather than on theoretical alternatives.
Yes. Only I know me. Only I know how I’ll feel, if I’ll be able to sleep at night, despite what anyone theorizes.
It’s difficult to get you excited.
It only takes a cook book or a creative project, and I can hardly sit still. N.
You rapidly get involved in social life at a new workplace.
I never get involved. I’m so anti-social in work situations. More than canned tuna, I hate office politics. I want no part of a work life.
It is in your nature to assume responsibility.
No. No. And No.
You frequently and easily express your feelings and emotions.
You often think about humankind and its destiny.
No. I wonder what my role in life and the universe is.
You believe the best decision is one that can be easily changed.
This is tough. I think a good decision is one that lasts. Being married or pregnant should not be easily changed. That’s what I see in decisions, the points where we take a risk and jump, knowing we can’t turn back. That’s a leap; it’s not necessarily "the best decision." I think making a decision, in and of itself, is picking a direction without having to go back and change it. N.
You are a person somewhat reserved and distant in communication.
I have a blog about my life. Please.
You prefer to act immediately rather than speculate about various options.
I weigh everything and rarely act impulsively, unless it’s to do with love. When love is involved, I’m impulsive. When jealousy is involved, I act first, and cry later. Mostly though, in life, I measure options. N.
You trust reason rather than feelings.
I could write a book about this. I have very strong feelings and have the capacity to feel things deeply, but I’ve learned that sometimes these feelings are completely irrational. So I question what’s really going on. I sabotage because of feelings. I also trust mine, despite how many times I’m left crying. I trust my gut instinct more than anything reasonable. I’d rather be wrong than wish I’d acted. N.
You spend your leisure time actively socializing with a group of people, attending parties, shopping, etc.
Surprisingly, no. I spend my leisure time alone. In book stores. In a bar with a glass of wine. Cooking at home. Watching movies with a pile of books by the bed. Drawing. Doing writing exercises. This is my life.
You usually plan your actions in advance.
No. I make lists sometimes of things I have to do. Deposit this. Sign that. Go to gym. Then I ignore most of it and do what I want. I rarely plan anything. I find the nights where I look like shit, without any makeup, sans shower in ugly clothes and sneakers tend to be my best and most memorable nights. Okay, forget the sneakers. That’s just pushing it.