She resolves to continue to hate the word, “resolutions.” To ignore diets and gym deals. To say nothing of her teeth or flossing or bad self-tanners or SPF. To stop fighting as much by trying to be patient and more empathetic. To eat more caviar on warmed bilinis. To stop worrying about never worrying about regular hair appointments. To make more lists. She resolves to keep being herself despite the requests that she should be more positive. She’ll continue to bitch about the cold and lack of space and her fat arms, but she doesn’t care enough to do anything about it, and she resolves to stay stubborn. She’ll dig in some nicer heels this year, but when she shops for them, she resolves to do something proper with her receipt, to be more accountable with where her money doesn’t go. She’ll make some spreadsheet or work with a program that sounds like the brand name for a running shoe, and it will help her come tax time when she won’t owe too much because she’ll know how to properly expense this time ‘round. To take it easy on herself and her lover, to get to what she can do to make the situation better, faster. To eat more of the green bitter category and the Baskin’ Robbins category because life is short. To play more board games and have more suburban-type parties having something to do with scrap booking or swapping, just not keys or partners. To eat a cruller every now and then. To wear more color. To eat Grey’s Papaya while she still can. She resolves, as she does each year, to stop biting her nails, to pay attention to coincidence, to draw, to write, to cry and laugh each day. Praise more. To ask, how should I respond to this gracefully, instead of asking, why. To print her goddamn digital photos, so there’s something to show for her stupor. To make more new friends. To grow instead of run. To give up on resolving to run more. To be less afraid to express her needs and wants directly, without manipulation (in fear of being seen as too needy). To try something new each day… a new path home, rabbit, starting her day dancing, soy milk, doing something "I’d never do that!" Stepping outside her comfort zone to try to be… to try to change. Forget about the heels.