Lately I’ve been obsessed with Psychology, though I suppose "obsessed" isn’t the proper word. Interested. I’m nearly tempted to begin reading my old college text books, if only I had the time and space for them, here in my small one bedroom life. I’ve been told by a man once that he wouldn’t date anyone who had anything to do with Psychology. "They’re all nuts," he said. Then I told him it was my minor. We toasted and he dates me still. Another MID felt the real crazy women were always half-Jews. "You’re the least crazy one," he qualified as if it was some concession. And yet another MID believed (and don’t scream at me for this for the love of God) we choose the ones we date based on the femininity of their race. He named races on his fingers. Black. Indian. White. Asian.
"What about Hispanic or Native American? I mean, there are other races out there, ya know."
"Yeah, yeah. Shut it Klein and just work with me here. It’s a theory not a thesis at this point." So I stopped questioning and listened as I rolled my eyes. This wasn’t the kind of conversation I wanted to have on a hungover Sunday."That’s the order of race as it’s mapped to masculine features. Men will typically prefer dating women who are more feminine than they are. So as a white guy, I’ll typically only date other white women and Asian chicks, and younger women of those races tend to be seen as more feminine than older ones. That’s why men also typically are attracted to younger women, while women are attracted to older men. Not old old. You know what I mean." I did? "Stephanie, I’ve been with all types, but those are the ones I prefer. Yes, before you go and yell at me, of course there are exceptions. Of course there are very feminine black women in the world. But the ones I’d be attracted to would have more feminine features. Yes there is a lot more to the science than race if you then account for the proportion of her body, but that aside, it comes down to race as it relates to masculinity and femininity. "
It got me wondering about the idea of femininity, what makes something a feminine feature? A dainty little Asian giggling beneath an umbrella? Perhaps the new Nike advertisements emoting confidence with our more ample features are working to combat the stereotypes. I fcuking love those ads. They don’t just emphasize learning to love what you’ve got. They make scraped knees and broad shoulders something to be achieved, for the love of femininity.
"It works for women, too. They typically only want to date someone of their level or more masculine, so as a white woman, you have more attractive options than I do."
"Did ya ever think I have more attractive options because I don’t think the way you do?" Talk about crazy.