I never eat steak. Last night, at Raoul’s, I broke through never with a steak knife. I didn’t just eat a steak; I ordered and slaughtered it, along with two orders of fries with mayonnaise, as promised. It’s what I needed. The 2000 bottle of Nickel & Nickel’s Tench Vineyard Cabernet Sauvignon was a very luscious bonus. Just before leaving, the waitress handed me a glassine envelope, filled with petite cookies, sealed with a sticker. Ah, the power of the goodie bag… takes me back to Bar Mitzvahs. Speaking of Mitzvahs…
Last week I accompanied an ex-but-he’s-just-a-friend—we’ll call him Eeyore—to his company dinner at Cipriani’s. While there, I dazzled the partners of the firm with my eyelashes, witty banter, and useful food trivia (When do you use a serrated knife? What’s the difference between a fruit and a vegetable? Grapeseed oil is practically flavorless and has a higher burning point! I know, well they asked!). Personally, I was dazzled by the wine. “You must remember who makes this and email me the name in the morning,” I commanded in a whisper to Eeyore. His blue eyes looked like sea glass and made me thirsty for affection. I knew it was time to leave.
Eeyore phoned to thank me this morning. “No one can stop speaking about you. And no one can believe you’re with me."
"I’m not with you."
"Yeah, but they don’t know that. Damn, I bet they’ll even give me a bigger bonus."
"All the more to buy me things with."
"You know, Stephanie, you really are wonderful.” This is Eeyore’s favorite phrase; he says it as often as “you might as well make it a double.” I love him, despite the fact that his letting me go was “a jackass move”—his second favorite phrase.
“Thanks Dear. Did you find out the name of the wine we were drinking?”
“Uh, no. But I will; I promise.” Eeyore is good with promises as long as he remembers making them.
When I arrived home tonight, my doorman made the face. The face they make when you’ve got something unexpected, like flowers, a legendary little handbag from an au courant friend, or a case of wine!
Eeyore outdid himself… and then some. The card was not, in fact, from Eeyore but from Roo, a prospective suitor. "Just because I wasn’t with you, doesn’t mean I couldn’t bring it to you." Turns out, after I raved to Roo about the wine I shared with “a friend over his company dinner,” he phoned the restaurant, got the name of the wine “the redheaded lady was enjoying last night.” Then he phoned several distributors, and voila! Door to door alcohol damage in a day. I love New York and resourceful men.