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In ALL, INTROSPECTION by Stephanie Klein20 Comments

in my birthday suit right now, watching Linus chase the best toy I ever could have found: a fly. He’s chasing it around the apartment, his little cleats click on my hardwood floors, and I’m laughing into a cry. I love my dog, my family, my friends, and my life. 29 doesn’t feel old, but it feels scary. I want babies and a husband. I want more than one child, and after 35 years old, it’s like asking for a deformity. I want healthy babies and a real marriage. It’s not everything, but it’s a birthday wish just the same. Relax, it’s not what I’ll wish for when I blow out my candles and smear icing on my face… cause then it won’t come true. Whatevs. Still, it’s not so bad cuddling up with the love of my life, sleeping in my crotch, beneath the covers. I love Linus. I hope I get flowers today. It’s not a hint; it’s just one of those it-shouldn’t-mean-anything-but-it-just-does wishes. I can’t help it. Ahem, have you seen my DVD collection lately? Oy, indeed. I’m 29 on the 29th of September; that only happens once. Then again, so does 30 on the 29th… ah, something to look forward to. Right.

Come celebrate with me and all my "offline" friends this Saturday night, October 2, 2004 at 10:30 pm. Pop Burger, (9th Ave. b/w 14th and 15th streets), New York, NY. How can any bash with the word "burger" in it be bad? Yum. I’ll be there with all the girls… including my outrageous sister whom about, apparently, I never write enough. Seriously, you’re all welcome. Go ahead, follow suit and name drop; it’s encouraged. Say it with me, "Stephanie Klein… she’s feeling fine at 29." Rage.

Comments

  1. I turned…*oh shit, I just broke a nail* on September 1. I will say this about getting older…. it gets better!!!! Trust me on this… the best sex is yet to come. (sorry for the pun *L*). All your wants, worries, thoughts and ideas will be an iota of a thought tucked away somewhere in your brain space, and you'll find yourself saying "fuck it!" a lot! I digress…

    I hope you get flowers… a big bouquet of beautiful flowers. I wish you a most wonderful, enjoyable and happy birthday! Savor it, love it, roll in it.

    Buon Compleano Stephanie!

  2. LOL. When I introduced my friend to your blog, she browsed through a few entries and said, "aah, clearly a Libra". Whatever indicated that (I never asked) I don't know but I'm sitting here laughing at her accuracy. Happy Birthday! Only five weeks to go before this Scorpio hits 33. :-(

    My German Shepherd likes flies too. He's good at catching them though and is very sadistic. He bashes them until they can't fly anymore, rips their wings off and watches them walk around the carpet before finally stamping on them. Summer is a nightmare though when you've got a 45KG dog (5ft 9in tall when walking on his back legs) slamming into windows, furniture and more delicate objects. The occasional wasp has been known to calm him down though. ;-)

  3. Happy Birthday, Stephanie! Would love to be able to jet out to NYC to celebrate, however, I'll be at a wedding. Have a fantabulous time and just enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.

    Sending you a mental boquet of brightly-colored exotic flowers as beautiful as you can imagine your way! Happy Birthday!

  4. Birthdays come and go. For f***s sake, its just a number! Age is a state of mind as I see it.

    Any way Happy Birthday!!

  5. i bet you weird/lame poster "Tom" shows up to Pop naked and drooling. You should hire security.

  6. Happy Birthday!

    I'm a fairly new reader of your site…but it's always great and entertaining…

    I turn the big 3-0 in April…but who cares…men get distinguished as they age, right?

  7. Happy birthday! Wishing you an incredibly happy birthday and a great year to follow! And one day your dreams will come true. You will get all that you wish for! Until that day, enjoy being you. Because you are truly amazing!

  8. Happy 29, Stephanie! I hope it's a day of wonder and delight and that the year to follow is one of your best yet.

    We Librans (I turn 28 on 10/12) have a year of ecstacy ahead – it's written in the stars. My boss, who's into astrology, says Jupiter is moving into our moon, which means utter out-of-control contentment and happiness. So cheers, and let's make it a year for the record books!

  9. Happy 29, Stephanie! I hope it's a day of wonder and delight and that the year to follow is one of your best yet.

    We Librans (I turn 28 on 10/12) have a year of ecstacy ahead – it's written in the stars. My boss, who's into astrology, says Jupiter is moving into our moon, which means utter out-of-control contentment and happiness. So cheers, and let's make it a year for the record books!

  10. Sorry for posting twice. Got confused by the new commenting feature.

    Have a great day!

  11. Happy happy happy happy happy happy B-day.
    Also, cuddling up with the love of your life in your crotch is not too bad at all.

    Also also…don't let these Okie doctors influence you–over 35 and having a baby is just fine.

    Went through that w/my wife–almost killed the "specialist." Our baby was slated to have Cystic Fibrosis, water on the brain, 8 legs, 4 arms, 45 heads, a cleft palate, and Carrottop's face.

    None of it was true. She was the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life.

    Feck the OBs!

  12. A very happy birthday to you! I'd never think you were 30…25 tops.

    Us Librans need to stick together, I turn 33 tomorrow. Well, since there's always time for a random act of kindness like flowers for a beautiful woman, one would just need to inquire as to your preferrence…

  13. Happy birthday,YOUNG lady. When I told my father I was 35 this year (he'd forgotten how old I am) his reaction was to say "half way there, then", so there's obviously no need to worry about being 29 when you can look forward to your nearest and dearest being far ruder in the future.

    I wish I could join you for the party but I'll be at a much younger colleague's engagement party on Saturday (younger and engaged, some people are so cruel aren't they)…oh, and I'm on the wrong continent – details, details!

    Have a good one; I always find alcohol nicely lubricates the gentle slide into old age!!

  14. My sister is 29, our mom is baby crazy and wants grandkids ASAP. She uses scare tactics on my sister all the time, things like "after 27 it gets exponentially harder to have kids every year". It is pretty scarey to think that my mom was my age when she had me. Anyway, Happy Birthday you fantastic source of entertainment at my crappy boring job.

  15. Some not so normal people would prefer that I attend your party nude and drooling. Unfortunately for them, I am not that type of guy. In any event, I will be celebrating my own birthday some place else in the city. I hope you enjoy your party to the fullest and all the best.

  16. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! You should be happy my friend. Good things are in the works for you. I won't be at the bash unfortunately but I'll be there in spirit. Have a drink for me.

  17. Steph,
    You are a mere pup in this world with so much of life ahead of you. You certainly don't need anyone telling you to live life to the fullest because you are already do that. But don't fret over the marriage/kids thing. THe over 35 having kids is really a misnomer today. I am 37 and my wife will be 40 in three weeks and we have two great boys, 4 yrs old and almost three months old. My wife was 30 going on 31 when we got married. And we didn't rush kids. We travelled and enjoyed ourselves then had our first when she was 36. Wouldn't change anything either. And one last thing. "Tom" is a great guy. I know because I am not only a good friend of his, but also his financial advisor. Make sure he is at your party on 10/2!!!

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